Stevie1

Have you tried cognitive behaviour therapy?* I have a friend who had great luck controlling panic attacks with various visualization and breathing/yoga type exercises...she went to a therapist who specialized in that sort of thing.

Where to start...I guess it depends on where you live and what your resources are. Last time I went looking for "brain cootie" help I had two choices: a medical school with a comprehensive psych program and a large clinic that dealt with everything from addiction to mood disorders to neurological/brain trauma issues, with therapists and docs trained in various disciplines on staff. I went with the latter because they are close and quite affordable. However, med schools often have clinical trials available, something to look into.

We're not supposed to offer medical advice here...it seems that your issue is more about controlling anxiety than alcohol. But if you want to avoid chemicals, avoiding the chemicals in alcohol would be a good start.

*Edit - I see you're planning on trying that. I think that's a good plan.

sk8man121

I'm looking forward to CBT; I think it's going to be very helpful. Perhaps a visit to a pdoc wouldn't hurt either.

At least I'm tackling this instead of self-medicating like I did for years. That has me feeling good.

MemphisBlues

S8M -- Very good progress. No doctor here, but from someone who went through severe benzo withdrawal and who has obsessively read everything I can on the subject, marijuana could have dampened the benzo withdrawal symptoms. Remove the pot, wham, benzo withdrawal again. That's jut my theory. And your stint with Xanax could have kick-started further withdrawal symptoms..

Now that you've given up weed -- which I relied on for years to curb my anxiety -- maybe the benzo withdrawal is cranking up again.

Regardless, congratulations on your determination. Here you'll find people very wary of mind-altering chemicals, period, and alcohol is a major one. That one or two beers gets me concerned. Maybe you're one of those aliens -- normal -- who doesn't need it, can control it, can use your "will power'' to keep it in line.

But for me, I would have to ask this question: What was your pattern of marijuana use? If it was daily, even though many believe pot isn't addictive, maybe you, like me, smoked it in an addictive manner.

And for me, pot was addictive. And for me, along with 20 milligrams of Klonopin every day, it was the salve for my anxiety.

And on top of it all I poured booze.

You're young. Many people wait decades before getting to where you're at. Then again, many had the resolve you do only to lose it as the years brought more pressure and more anxiety. CBT is the way to go. For others, it's getting in touch with a power greater than themselves. For a lot of folks it's both.

Regarding antidepressants, many here -- like me -- have found that they contribute to anxiety. If what you're going through is benzo related (with withdrawal symptoms that were masked by pot use) it does get better with time. But the paradoxical aspect is a stickler -- it doesn't want to go away, that anxiety that comes back harder than before we ever relied on benzos.

I have nothing against doctors. They've saved my life. But a GP will whip out the prescription pad in a heartbeat, but you have to live with what the drugs do to you for the rest of your life.

Good luck. Keep coming back.