Getting social in sobriety
Getting social in sobriety
From my experience, it seems hard to regain social skills without the help of booze.. I have good days and then I have days where I'd appreciate it if you'd pretend I'm not there.. I miss the good ole' days where I ENJOYED hanging out with friends- without having to get F'd up first. What is your opinion on the subject?
From my experience, it seems hard to regain social skills without the help of booze.. I have good days and then I have days where I'd appreciate it if you'd pretend I'm not there.. I miss the good ole' days where I ENJOYED hanging out with friends- without having to get F'd up first. What is your opinion on the subject?
I didn't turn into a loner in one day, one week, or even one year... So it will probably take a long time to get that back, with effort on my part along the way.
I'm finding this remarkably difficult too. My good days are when I don't think about drinking and just think about being healthy and whole. This whole thing seems to start with a dark night of the soul, accepting that voyage to a new land. I have to believe that once I'm comfortable in that dark night - sobriety - that I'll find that better place (wow... that's sounding SO preachy... sorry. Those are probably someone else's words mushed together 'cause original thoughts are still difficult to form.)
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: CA
Posts: 2,977
Having fun sober hangin with friends is still new to me. When I was drinking I never thought I could actually laugh and have fun sober, in fact if someone told me that when I was still drinking I prob would've looked at them like they were crazy or something. I started isolating drinking by myself about 4yrs ago once my "normal" friends got tired of being around me since I was always wasted. I enjoy going out but sometimes still feel a lil awkward I guess.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 27
I'll find out tomorrow. Blow out Super Bowl Party at my BF's. I plan to use the largest plastic mug I can find and fill it with gator aide. I've volunteered to do the pics and videos (that should be an eye opener). But I refuse to give up this party, it's one of the biggest events of the year. My life's going to be better without alcohol not worse.
I'm an alcoholic mother so I'm lucky in a way because most of the social things I'm involved with are alcohol free or minimal alcohol. My addiction kept me out of things. So now that I'm sober I can finally fit in.
The only thing I really had to change was to try to be a little more outgoing. And now when meeting new people I don't froget their names as often. I'm in sales so I've never been afraid to talk to people, but when I was sober in social situations I used to prefer to keep to myself. So really it has been positive, because the only thing I need to do not to feel uncomfortable is to be more friendly and start conversations. I always saw this as almost a phobia of mine, but the more forced I am to do it the more natural it feels, and the more I get to know other people, and the friendly I become the more accepted I am.
It wasn't super easy, but has been an enlightening experience for me, and I am a better person for it.
It wasn't super easy, but has been an enlightening experience for me, and I am a better person for it.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 75
I used to not even be able to answer the phone unless I had something to "loosen me up" because I get so nervous talking to people. Needless to say the past month has been very difficult socially for me since I have been sober.
Being an introvert naturally makes it a lot of work to be in social situations. I can be social, but really, it makes me tired. It doesn't come naturally. Perhaps you too, are just naturally an introvert. Extroverts naturally like being with people and are energized by being with them. Introverts are the opposite.
But, have you also thought about perhaps talking to a counselor? Might help you sort your feelings out about how you view yourself and your self-esteem around other people.
Alcohol just covers up the toxic stuff. Take this opportunity to learn about yourself maybe.
But, have you also thought about perhaps talking to a counselor? Might help you sort your feelings out about how you view yourself and your self-esteem around other people.
Alcohol just covers up the toxic stuff. Take this opportunity to learn about yourself maybe.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: San Antonio, TX
Posts: 11
I am also in sales as supercrew is and I am a natural people person. I prefer only hanging out with friends and family when I am sober. I never really liked to drink with others and when I did I would try my best to watch how much I did. I liked getting wasted by myself for some reason. I never liked hearing others to tell me to slow down, it would ruin it for me. I have 2 days now, but was sober 2 other times in my life. I ind that I am more social sober than I was as a drunk.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)