Having trouble doing anything after 2nd DUI
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 1,410
Having trouble doing anything after 2nd DUI
I'm having a hard time doing anything after my 2nd DUI from the weekend. Most of the time I lay in bed or on the computer and look at the SC chat. Waiting for someone to talk to. I'm between jobs and my court day is next month. I feel stupid and a loser for what I have done. I was doing so well too from not drinking. Getting in shape, eat right, looking for a job and staying out of trouble. But I guess it only takes one mistake to mess everything up again.
Thanks for listening.
Thanks for listening.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: New York State
Posts: 58
Keep your head up Act. So you made a mistake...learn from this experience. We've all done stupid things...at least I have. Take the time before your court date to get sober again and show up with no excuses but a contrite heart. Truth goes a long way in recovery...but you already know that. Keep coming in here for encouragement when needed & maybe along the way help out someone else in need.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Tampa
Posts: 178
I would like to tell you not to feel down, but I would be BSing you, as I feel the same over my first dui. The guilt and sorrow and worry are incredible.
The mistake is made and now the only thing left for us is to await the inevitable... whatever that may be. As it sinks in, day after day, I come to terms that I have no control over the outcome of it. BUT I have control over making sure it never happens again.
My solution isn't to never drink and drive again. My solution (for me) is to never drink again. Why should I put driving into the formula. It was drinking that caused the problem. We do learn from our mistakes. My mistake was drinking.
Cheer up as best as you can. I'm going through this with you. You're not alone so don't think you are. We just have to go through hell. Abstaining from alcohol will teach us that we are strong enough to get through anything.
Paul
The mistake is made and now the only thing left for us is to await the inevitable... whatever that may be. As it sinks in, day after day, I come to terms that I have no control over the outcome of it. BUT I have control over making sure it never happens again.
My solution isn't to never drink and drive again. My solution (for me) is to never drink again. Why should I put driving into the formula. It was drinking that caused the problem. We do learn from our mistakes. My mistake was drinking.
Cheer up as best as you can. I'm going through this with you. You're not alone so don't think you are. We just have to go through hell. Abstaining from alcohol will teach us that we are strong enough to get through anything.
Paul
Eating protein and life.
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Just. Plain. Grateful.
Posts: 503
ACT10Npack chin up soldier!
You walk a path beset by temptation, humiliation, and regret. As you march toward the sword that is bathed and infused with your pain and sorrow but infinitely powerful, you will first fight your way to it without one.
Put on the helmet of good decisions, the breastplate of good company, and the boots of good direction.
Once you finally arrive at your sword...you'll find you no longer need it.
All the best,
Untox
You walk a path beset by temptation, humiliation, and regret. As you march toward the sword that is bathed and infused with your pain and sorrow but infinitely powerful, you will first fight your way to it without one.
Put on the helmet of good decisions, the breastplate of good company, and the boots of good direction.
Once you finally arrive at your sword...you'll find you no longer need it.
All the best,
Untox
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Wisco
Posts: 61
I am a firm believer in everything happens for a reason. In the past year, I have lost 2 jobs because of drinking but luckily, I was able to get another one rather quickly once again and I think I might actually enjoy this one but I would have never applied if I didn't NEED a job.
So take sometime to gather yourself and then go out into the world confident and knowing that you are a changed person with new goals and objectives. Perhaps this is all a blessing in disguise
So take sometime to gather yourself and then go out into the world confident and knowing that you are a changed person with new goals and objectives. Perhaps this is all a blessing in disguise
Dismember
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: The Mitten, USA
Posts: 1,641
You just gotta keep pushing. Do whatever you can with what is still in front of you. My second DUI seemed to kill off a lot of my options. My license was gone and I could barely find stable work with the massive community service and mandatory therapy that took up my day.
You can still do positive things while on probation, in fact it'll probably be a huge boost to your sense of self to keep at those things. The exercise, nutrition, taking care of your body. Get out and be involved in your community. Go ask your old, widowed neighbor if she needs any help around the house.
Personally, I was super ashamed at my second. I always believed I was truly the good kid and there I was endangering the lives of a lot of people. If that's part of the issue for you too I'll tell you this, all the good deeds you might do are just as good regardless of your legal status.
You can still do positive things while on probation, in fact it'll probably be a huge boost to your sense of self to keep at those things. The exercise, nutrition, taking care of your body. Get out and be involved in your community. Go ask your old, widowed neighbor if she needs any help around the house.
Personally, I was super ashamed at my second. I always believed I was truly the good kid and there I was endangering the lives of a lot of people. If that's part of the issue for you too I'll tell you this, all the good deeds you might do are just as good regardless of your legal status.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Sydney NSW
Posts: 343
[QUOTE=ACT10Npack;2820856]I'm having a hard time doing anything after my 2nd DUI from the weekend.
I can understand what you are going through I got my second DUI six months ago and after I got it I went and totally lost it and felt like my life now really was over that now I really had hit rock bottom. I went to rehab for eight weeks, for three out of those eight weeks my depression and anxiety and fear peaked, once my medication kicked in and I learned some skills in rehab I knew I had to make a choice either to continue living or to die. So I chose to continue living and take responsibiltiy for my mistake and face the consequences which will be on the 22nd of Feb. Please do not punish yourself more then you ought to what is done is done, all you have is the today...... I know it is hard believe me I go through it everyday. Please hang in there.
I can understand what you are going through I got my second DUI six months ago and after I got it I went and totally lost it and felt like my life now really was over that now I really had hit rock bottom. I went to rehab for eight weeks, for three out of those eight weeks my depression and anxiety and fear peaked, once my medication kicked in and I learned some skills in rehab I knew I had to make a choice either to continue living or to die. So I chose to continue living and take responsibiltiy for my mistake and face the consequences which will be on the 22nd of Feb. Please do not punish yourself more then you ought to what is done is done, all you have is the today...... I know it is hard believe me I go through it everyday. Please hang in there.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 270
My reactions changed with each one. Mystified at being such an innocent victim of circumstance on #1, very abashed and down and forever after resolute to do better on #2, shrugging off #3 as not that big a deal for a guy with a good lawyer, #4 was back to being mystified that the system would be entrapping me as they were obviously doing.
I see you're abashed and resolute.
I see you're abashed and resolute.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 1,410
I have not gone to court for the charge yet. I have no clue when I will have to go. My lawyer is still working on mine still. It sucks but I'm not worry about it anymore. I will be little bit when it comes to the date but now I'm not thinking about it. Just moving on with my life. Its the only thing I can do. I can learn from it or worry to death from it.
1000 Post Club
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Midwest USA
Posts: 2,284
Getting a DUI is a horrible experience. I'm in the long process of trying to get my license back after 2 DUI's. Everyone likes to tell me how lucky I am that I never hurt anyone. But I didn't & have forgiven myself and moving forward. I do not believe that a 1 time DUI makes someone an alcoholic but a 2nd DUI probably does. The second DUI made me sell my car, move to the big city & continue to drink to lower bottoms. Hopefully, this DUI will be a wakeup call. However, consequences do not always deter dedicated alcoholics.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Tucson, AZ
Posts: 957
When I got my second DUI I was floored, shamed and so scared. Remember, we make it so much more worst in our heads of what the outcome will be, but I knew that I was done drinking for good.
I had over 5 years sober, then had a brief 2 day relapse and have now been sober 4 two years at the end of this month. Being sober is awesome, I do not need to drink to have a good time. I do not miss alcohol!
I'm so grateful that I never killed or hurt anyone while drinking and driving. Thank you God.
You will get through this, whatever the outcome is, but you really need to quit the alcohol now, it sure isn't worth it.
I had over 5 years sober, then had a brief 2 day relapse and have now been sober 4 two years at the end of this month. Being sober is awesome, I do not need to drink to have a good time. I do not miss alcohol!
I'm so grateful that I never killed or hurt anyone while drinking and driving. Thank you God.
You will get through this, whatever the outcome is, but you really need to quit the alcohol now, it sure isn't worth it.
Snarf Snarf
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: ATL
Posts: 835
The night of my second DUI was also the last night I had a drink. It sucks that it came to that for me to make a change, but I guess I didn't pay attention the other million times that my drinking caused a problem in my life or somebody else's.
The driving restrictions for my first DUI weren't so bad. I had a provisional license to drive to school and work, so I pretty much went wherever I wanted and just figured I'd make up a story about a school or work function if I got pulled over. But with DUI #2 I got a hard suspension for 12 months, then I have to have an Interlock device on my car for 6 months when I start driving again. Of course, this is costing me a lot of money as well, since I have to go to DUI school and pay for reinstatement of my license and all that stuff.
But I'm thankful that nothing worse happened to me or anyone else, and I look forward to that day (only 2 months now) that I'm back on the roads. Like you said, ACT10N, may as well learn from it. No sense worrying or beating yourself up. Move along with life, make changes that will allow you to make better decisions, and do everything you can to make sure you never end up in a situation like this again.
The driving restrictions for my first DUI weren't so bad. I had a provisional license to drive to school and work, so I pretty much went wherever I wanted and just figured I'd make up a story about a school or work function if I got pulled over. But with DUI #2 I got a hard suspension for 12 months, then I have to have an Interlock device on my car for 6 months when I start driving again. Of course, this is costing me a lot of money as well, since I have to go to DUI school and pay for reinstatement of my license and all that stuff.
But I'm thankful that nothing worse happened to me or anyone else, and I look forward to that day (only 2 months now) that I'm back on the roads. Like you said, ACT10N, may as well learn from it. No sense worrying or beating yourself up. Move along with life, make changes that will allow you to make better decisions, and do everything you can to make sure you never end up in a situation like this again.
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