My story of hope
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 1
My story of hope
Hello everyone,
This is my story of how allowing myself to become dependent on opiod medication changed my life.
I had been going through physical withdrawals of opiate pain medication for several days now, and am out of the woords for the most part. The past few weeks of my life have been hell on earth, but also a blessing at the same time. Reading every ones posts have helped me through this difficult time that I felt nobody I really know would understand... or would I dare to share it with for that matter. With that said, I wanted to share my story of success in hopes that it will help someone else that has experienced or is currently going through a similar situation.
My background:
29 year old male. Self sufficient, good career, and used to have zest for life and friends. No history of drugs use, w/ the exception of a few sporadic instances of smoking pot in high school... nothing after that. I had all ways felt that drugs not my thing, distanced myself from people who use them.
How it started:
I had my appendix removed and was prescribed hydrocodone (10/325) for pain as needed. Thankfully, the procedure now days is minimally evasive and the pain associated with the operation was tolerable. I was given a (2) ten pill prescriptions which got me through the days after surgery. They worked like a charm, I didn't even need to get my second prescription filled. I bounced back quickly, and even went to Vegas a few days after surgery.
After returning to my regular life, I started to notice my back problems that had always been somewhat noticeable had gotten progressively worse, to the point where I could not sleep from the constant discomfort and pain. To find relief, I tried every over the counter remedy you could think of from patches, creams, and pills. Started doing stretching, and going to a chiropractor. Then, one day a little light bulb went off in my head.... why don't I fill that prescription for those pain pills from my surgery and see if they do the trick. They did. I was able to get to sleep with no problems, and when the pain got really bad one of those pills would make it better within minutes. It was the answer to my problems... no more pain! My quality of life shot up 100%!
The pills lasted me a couple of weeks, because I took them sparingly, only when I couldn't take the pain anymore (usually at night time when the pain is preventing me from being able to sleep) Once they ran out, I knew I needed to see a doctor. I went to multiple clinics and was told the same thing... pulled back muscles. I did my research and took the steps to try to heal them. I applied heat/cold packs, worked out my back, stretched constantly, and even considered taking up yoga and workout tapes with my g/f (I never did more than a few times as the pain made it too difficult to do). I was prescribed all kinds of muscle relaxers and pain relievers (none opiate). I couldn't stand the way the muscle relaxers made me feel, and none of the pain medication seemed to be helping. It was getting rather discouraging... I was 29 and feeling like a 60 year old. I was desperate for answers, as I was beginning to worry it would start to take a toll on my ability to work, and the wonderful relationship I had with my g/f who I had been dating for more than a year and a half at the time. I wasn't as enthusiastic about being physically active because of the pain, and I began to shy away from doing strenuous activity and even going out for that matter. I joined a softball team and couldn't even make it through the practice... much less actually play in the games!
Finally I found a doctor that was actually interested in finding the root cause of the pain. She sent me to get an MRI on my back and sure enough, it wasn't pulled muscles. I actually had 6 herniated discs, and a spine facet that was pinching a nerve. My back was messed up! Though some people would have not liked that news, I cannot share how much of a relief it was to find out what had been making me miserable! The doctor prescribed me some meds to help with the pain and scheduled me for a follow up appointment in one month in which we would then explore my options for correcting the problem. I was prescribed 120 hydrocodone (10/325) and ibuprofen. Finally, some relief... it was great to be 29 again! I took the medication as directed (1-2 every 4-6 hours). At first it made me very sick... to the point I almost stopped taking them. I wish I had. I weighed out the cons and decided that at least the pain was gone and I could sleep while taking them... even if I was somewhat queasy. Well after a few days I noticed that the undesirable effects wore off and I actually started to notice an increase in energy when I took them! I never experienced the "high" many people on here talk about, but I did notice that I felt like I could do anything.
Life was great for the next month or so. I had my life back. I could do anything... and my relationship was getting better. I even started to get the marriage "itch" and was taking steps to save up for a ring... just in case Life could not have been better.
I continued to see my doc once a month and got my refills. At first I could not even imagine using 120 pills a month, and sort of built up a stock pile. However, after a few months I noticed I had to increase the amount I took to get the same relief. Soon, I was taking all the pills each month. I certainly never abused my medication and never took more then the recommended dose. Like I said I never experienced the "high" allot of people on here talk about, but I started to notice that my body was needing them to function. I wish at that time I had done some real research on the medication. I am a pretty strong willed person, and if knew what I know now about those little pills I would have tossed them in the trash and never looked back. Unfortunately, I didn't as I was glad to just not be in pain.
Meanwhile, I didn't even realize that myself and the life around me was changing. You see, the tricky little thing about these pills is that they not only take away physical feelings, they also take away your emotions and motivation. The problem is that you notice that the physical pain is gone, but you don't notice that you also lose everything else. My "zest" for life diminished beneath me and I didn't even notice. Pretty soon, I was just kind of going through the motions of life, without any real feelings or motivation without me even noticing the change.
One day I decided to stop taking the medicine because I simply just got tired of taking them. Coincidentally or so I thought, I got the "flu" at the same time. I took a pain pill to help with the "flu" body aches and the symptoms went away instantly. Wow a cure for the flu... lol. I was curious about what I had just witnessed so I did a little research and googled the effects of hydrocodone.
That was when the bomb dropped. I realized that I actually hadn't had the flu at all, but I was actually going through opiate medication withdrawal. My body had become dependent on the pain medication! How in the heck did I let that happen? How could I of been so dumb to not research the medications I was taking. Man I was so devastated.. and honestly felt pretty stupid. At that time, I still didn't realize the damage I had done to myself, as I focused my research on what the physical withdrawals were like... not the other nasty attributes I had acquired while taking them.
Embarrassingly, I told my g/f what was going on and hunkered down for what I read were going to be a few days of hell. She was very uunderstanding and was not judgmental. She helped me tremendously, and even got me to get out of the house to go to the Arboretum on the third day. She allowed me to sit down and rest every 15 minutes or so, and her understanding was so encouraging. I think that was the first day in a long time that I had "real" happy feelings. I wish I had realized that was a result of me getting my mental clarity back. On day four I had to fly out and in the same day to teach a leadership workshop for work. After having 4-5 hours of sleep total for the past 3 days, that was one of the longest and hardest days of my life. That night, at 4:00am and I gave in and took a pill to get to sleep. Sleep was slowly improving the days after that and for the next few days I stayed clear of the pills, but kept them "just in case". I didn't stay off the pills long enough to recognize how I had lost my emotions, as they were very slow to come back. If I knew what I knew now, I would have flushed them (I know, thats a re-occurring theme).
Before too long I found myself struggling to cope with the back pain again and I decided to go back to sparingly taking the pills because I had to go on a long business trip to lead a project that had allot riding on it. It wasn't long before I made another appointment to the doctor and got another refill. I was back to taking them daily, and back to the malaise that came along with them.
Well as you can expect things in my life started to deteriorate. I never did anything bad so to speak, but just the general lack of feelings was destroying my relationship. My g/f got bored with me... and I don't blame her Soon she began doing things that I felt were not appropriate such as staying out late with people I didn't know... and if I tried to invite myself she would decline. I was so "doped" up that I couldn't see this coming or the reasoning behind it. I had convinced myself that she was wrong and not "respecting" our relationship... which in a sense is true... but looking back, I absolutely dont blame her! Who would want to be with some bum who just works and then wants to come home and watch tv every night? I was not the man she fell in love with.
In my mind, I was done with being treated like that. I had had enough. I had always thought of myself as an honest and caring man, and I felt that didn't need to be treated that way. Well we broke up and she moved out. Even though I was still on the medication, the break up was very hard for me. I rationalized that I was a good boyfriend, and that she had ruined our relationship.
The days after our break up I had allot of anger over the way things had ended... which was difficult for me because I am normally very slow to anger. I absolutely still loved her, so I never intentionally tried to channel that anger in a way that would be negative towards her. I can say though, looking back I was pretty cold toward her, which to this day hurts to think about.
I began to surround myself with all kinds of "friends" just to pass time. I began going out nightly, although I was again just going through the motions to stay busy. Here I am a newly single guy with girls chasing me... but I could care less. I had a void in my life, and was very unhappy.
I dont know why, maybe because I was desperate, but I reached out to God for guidance. I grew up in the church, so going to the Lord for help was not completely foreign to me, but it had been years since I had really had a relationship with my Lord. One night I broke down and prayed ... and man I prayed hard!
That was the turning point. I woke up the next day with a strong desire to stop taking the medication... which was something that never crossed my mind previously. Still unaware to how I had changed since taking them, I cant really explain the motivation to stop other than the was Lord answering my prayers
I did more research and found this website. Reading every ones posts I realized for the first time the changes I allowed to take over my life. It was a rude awakening to say the least... but it made me realize that I had allowed myself to get "lost". More importantly, I see now that I can change it.
I threw away the pills, called my new doctor (my old one moved) and cancelled my upcoming appointment. I again hunkered down for the next few days of hell that I knew were coming. I have to admit, even though I had done it before, this time I was a little anxious because I was doing it alone... or so I thought.
Day one wasn't so bad. I went to work as usual, but was drained by the time I got home. I started to have muscle aches so I decided I better go to the store and load up on the things I will need for the next few days. Then night came. That's when it hit. I had all the flu symptoms.... achy muscles, temp swings, sweats. I was able to finally get a couple of hours of sleep with the help of some prayer and melatonin
Day two I woke up with the same symptoms and now my GI tract was out of whack and vomiting ensued. I took some Imodium, loaded up on vitamins and forced myself to eat and drink. It was easy to keep it down, but I believe the fluids and nutrition helped allot. I spent the whole day in bed and the bath tub soaking in epson salts. That night little sleep came but depression sure did
Day three was the worst. Needless to say, I did allot of praying that day It took everything for me to just get out of bed to take a hot bath, which helped tremendously. Luckily, I was prepared and had bottles of water and food bedside, so I didn't have to move around allot.
Day four, wow what a difference. Things were starting to look up.. I even went ice skating breifly! (dont ask what brought than on). I began to get my mental clarity back, and even found myself laugh at something out loud. I was still drained of energy, but some of the bone and muscle aches had subsided somewhat.
From there on it is history... Its amazing that it only took three little days of physical hell to undo the imbalance that took about 6-7 months to build up inside me.
I am done with those evil little pills, and will never look back. I have absolutely NO DESIRE to take one of them again! When I say "evil" I dont mean to put a negative connetation on the pills themselves. They were just evil to me I know that many people are very much in need of pain medacine, I just dont think for me they are necessary. I am feeling better today than I have for months. I cant say that I am 100% yet, but each day is getting better and better.
I think going "cold turkey" takes an amazing amount of resolve... but it can be done! For me, it was an easy decision because I was able to see the distruction it caused my life.
I would encourage anyone who is in a similar situation to reach out to God for guidance... even if you are not a person of faith. I know the desperation this dependence can cause, so what do you have to lose by trying? I'm just saying.. it helped me
Here are a few tips to prepare yourself for the "journey". I am not a medical doctor by ANY means, but simply sharing what worked for me.
1. Stock up on good food and bottled water. I say bottled water because if I had to get up to get water, I wouldn't of drank it. Just keep large quantity bedside and keep telling yourself to drink it. The upset GI can cause you to get dehydrated, which will compound the pain. Though eating was difficult and forced, I do think it made me feel better overall. If you are on a diet... break it! I ate chocolate which has natural endorphins and it helped. Also get some bananas, the potassium helps combat the restless legs.
2. Get some vitamins supplements, and OTC remedies. Use a good multivitamin in the morning. Melatonin at bedtime helped me get the sleep that I did. Its natural and not habit forming. If you don't get bananas, get some potassium gluconate. I also found a product called "hylands restful legs". That stuff worked wonders! Ibuprofen can be used to help with the aches, and Imodium is your GI's best friend.
3. Get some Epsom salt! I cannot stress enough the benefits of soaking in a hot tub with salts! While in the tub it took away most of the symptoms and continued to do so for about 20-30 minutes afterwords. Spend your entire day in the tub if you have to! Just be sure to wash off with clean water afterwords... the stinky smell got to me when I lied down afterwords.
4. Don't be scared! I think that half the withdrawal demon is the fear of what you know whats coming. Just keep telling yourself that it will pass, and you will be better than ever when it does. In a way I "enjoyed" my cleansing. I kept thinking about how going through this pain was the best investment I could make in myself. You are worth it!
5. Keep a positive attitude. I was very hard on myself in the beginning. I had allot of feelings of shame that I let this happen. DONT! Its sooo counter productive. I realized this halfway though and it made an amazing difference when I stopped.
6. Make sure you plan a few days for recovery where you don't have any major responsibilities to tend to. I can imagine that the temptation to take another pill would increase if I was not physically able to fulfill my responsibilities. I worked on day one, and though it was difficult, I got out and did things by day four. Day two and three at work would not of been an option for me.
And there you have it! If I can do this, so can you! It was a struggle and fight to get my body back.... now I can start the fight to get the rest of my life back (and its worth the fight)!
Thanks for reading, I apologize for the length. I just wanted to share all the details, as I can imagine some of us come to the same conclusion based off similar situations. I hope that my success can help encourage someone else in need.
This is my story of how allowing myself to become dependent on opiod medication changed my life.
I had been going through physical withdrawals of opiate pain medication for several days now, and am out of the woords for the most part. The past few weeks of my life have been hell on earth, but also a blessing at the same time. Reading every ones posts have helped me through this difficult time that I felt nobody I really know would understand... or would I dare to share it with for that matter. With that said, I wanted to share my story of success in hopes that it will help someone else that has experienced or is currently going through a similar situation.
My background:
29 year old male. Self sufficient, good career, and used to have zest for life and friends. No history of drugs use, w/ the exception of a few sporadic instances of smoking pot in high school... nothing after that. I had all ways felt that drugs not my thing, distanced myself from people who use them.
How it started:
I had my appendix removed and was prescribed hydrocodone (10/325) for pain as needed. Thankfully, the procedure now days is minimally evasive and the pain associated with the operation was tolerable. I was given a (2) ten pill prescriptions which got me through the days after surgery. They worked like a charm, I didn't even need to get my second prescription filled. I bounced back quickly, and even went to Vegas a few days after surgery.
After returning to my regular life, I started to notice my back problems that had always been somewhat noticeable had gotten progressively worse, to the point where I could not sleep from the constant discomfort and pain. To find relief, I tried every over the counter remedy you could think of from patches, creams, and pills. Started doing stretching, and going to a chiropractor. Then, one day a little light bulb went off in my head.... why don't I fill that prescription for those pain pills from my surgery and see if they do the trick. They did. I was able to get to sleep with no problems, and when the pain got really bad one of those pills would make it better within minutes. It was the answer to my problems... no more pain! My quality of life shot up 100%!
The pills lasted me a couple of weeks, because I took them sparingly, only when I couldn't take the pain anymore (usually at night time when the pain is preventing me from being able to sleep) Once they ran out, I knew I needed to see a doctor. I went to multiple clinics and was told the same thing... pulled back muscles. I did my research and took the steps to try to heal them. I applied heat/cold packs, worked out my back, stretched constantly, and even considered taking up yoga and workout tapes with my g/f (I never did more than a few times as the pain made it too difficult to do). I was prescribed all kinds of muscle relaxers and pain relievers (none opiate). I couldn't stand the way the muscle relaxers made me feel, and none of the pain medication seemed to be helping. It was getting rather discouraging... I was 29 and feeling like a 60 year old. I was desperate for answers, as I was beginning to worry it would start to take a toll on my ability to work, and the wonderful relationship I had with my g/f who I had been dating for more than a year and a half at the time. I wasn't as enthusiastic about being physically active because of the pain, and I began to shy away from doing strenuous activity and even going out for that matter. I joined a softball team and couldn't even make it through the practice... much less actually play in the games!
Finally I found a doctor that was actually interested in finding the root cause of the pain. She sent me to get an MRI on my back and sure enough, it wasn't pulled muscles. I actually had 6 herniated discs, and a spine facet that was pinching a nerve. My back was messed up! Though some people would have not liked that news, I cannot share how much of a relief it was to find out what had been making me miserable! The doctor prescribed me some meds to help with the pain and scheduled me for a follow up appointment in one month in which we would then explore my options for correcting the problem. I was prescribed 120 hydrocodone (10/325) and ibuprofen. Finally, some relief... it was great to be 29 again! I took the medication as directed (1-2 every 4-6 hours). At first it made me very sick... to the point I almost stopped taking them. I wish I had. I weighed out the cons and decided that at least the pain was gone and I could sleep while taking them... even if I was somewhat queasy. Well after a few days I noticed that the undesirable effects wore off and I actually started to notice an increase in energy when I took them! I never experienced the "high" many people on here talk about, but I did notice that I felt like I could do anything.
Life was great for the next month or so. I had my life back. I could do anything... and my relationship was getting better. I even started to get the marriage "itch" and was taking steps to save up for a ring... just in case Life could not have been better.
I continued to see my doc once a month and got my refills. At first I could not even imagine using 120 pills a month, and sort of built up a stock pile. However, after a few months I noticed I had to increase the amount I took to get the same relief. Soon, I was taking all the pills each month. I certainly never abused my medication and never took more then the recommended dose. Like I said I never experienced the "high" allot of people on here talk about, but I started to notice that my body was needing them to function. I wish at that time I had done some real research on the medication. I am a pretty strong willed person, and if knew what I know now about those little pills I would have tossed them in the trash and never looked back. Unfortunately, I didn't as I was glad to just not be in pain.
Meanwhile, I didn't even realize that myself and the life around me was changing. You see, the tricky little thing about these pills is that they not only take away physical feelings, they also take away your emotions and motivation. The problem is that you notice that the physical pain is gone, but you don't notice that you also lose everything else. My "zest" for life diminished beneath me and I didn't even notice. Pretty soon, I was just kind of going through the motions of life, without any real feelings or motivation without me even noticing the change.
One day I decided to stop taking the medicine because I simply just got tired of taking them. Coincidentally or so I thought, I got the "flu" at the same time. I took a pain pill to help with the "flu" body aches and the symptoms went away instantly. Wow a cure for the flu... lol. I was curious about what I had just witnessed so I did a little research and googled the effects of hydrocodone.
That was when the bomb dropped. I realized that I actually hadn't had the flu at all, but I was actually going through opiate medication withdrawal. My body had become dependent on the pain medication! How in the heck did I let that happen? How could I of been so dumb to not research the medications I was taking. Man I was so devastated.. and honestly felt pretty stupid. At that time, I still didn't realize the damage I had done to myself, as I focused my research on what the physical withdrawals were like... not the other nasty attributes I had acquired while taking them.
Embarrassingly, I told my g/f what was going on and hunkered down for what I read were going to be a few days of hell. She was very uunderstanding and was not judgmental. She helped me tremendously, and even got me to get out of the house to go to the Arboretum on the third day. She allowed me to sit down and rest every 15 minutes or so, and her understanding was so encouraging. I think that was the first day in a long time that I had "real" happy feelings. I wish I had realized that was a result of me getting my mental clarity back. On day four I had to fly out and in the same day to teach a leadership workshop for work. After having 4-5 hours of sleep total for the past 3 days, that was one of the longest and hardest days of my life. That night, at 4:00am and I gave in and took a pill to get to sleep. Sleep was slowly improving the days after that and for the next few days I stayed clear of the pills, but kept them "just in case". I didn't stay off the pills long enough to recognize how I had lost my emotions, as they were very slow to come back. If I knew what I knew now, I would have flushed them (I know, thats a re-occurring theme).
Before too long I found myself struggling to cope with the back pain again and I decided to go back to sparingly taking the pills because I had to go on a long business trip to lead a project that had allot riding on it. It wasn't long before I made another appointment to the doctor and got another refill. I was back to taking them daily, and back to the malaise that came along with them.
Well as you can expect things in my life started to deteriorate. I never did anything bad so to speak, but just the general lack of feelings was destroying my relationship. My g/f got bored with me... and I don't blame her Soon she began doing things that I felt were not appropriate such as staying out late with people I didn't know... and if I tried to invite myself she would decline. I was so "doped" up that I couldn't see this coming or the reasoning behind it. I had convinced myself that she was wrong and not "respecting" our relationship... which in a sense is true... but looking back, I absolutely dont blame her! Who would want to be with some bum who just works and then wants to come home and watch tv every night? I was not the man she fell in love with.
In my mind, I was done with being treated like that. I had had enough. I had always thought of myself as an honest and caring man, and I felt that didn't need to be treated that way. Well we broke up and she moved out. Even though I was still on the medication, the break up was very hard for me. I rationalized that I was a good boyfriend, and that she had ruined our relationship.
The days after our break up I had allot of anger over the way things had ended... which was difficult for me because I am normally very slow to anger. I absolutely still loved her, so I never intentionally tried to channel that anger in a way that would be negative towards her. I can say though, looking back I was pretty cold toward her, which to this day hurts to think about.
I began to surround myself with all kinds of "friends" just to pass time. I began going out nightly, although I was again just going through the motions to stay busy. Here I am a newly single guy with girls chasing me... but I could care less. I had a void in my life, and was very unhappy.
I dont know why, maybe because I was desperate, but I reached out to God for guidance. I grew up in the church, so going to the Lord for help was not completely foreign to me, but it had been years since I had really had a relationship with my Lord. One night I broke down and prayed ... and man I prayed hard!
That was the turning point. I woke up the next day with a strong desire to stop taking the medication... which was something that never crossed my mind previously. Still unaware to how I had changed since taking them, I cant really explain the motivation to stop other than the was Lord answering my prayers
I did more research and found this website. Reading every ones posts I realized for the first time the changes I allowed to take over my life. It was a rude awakening to say the least... but it made me realize that I had allowed myself to get "lost". More importantly, I see now that I can change it.
I threw away the pills, called my new doctor (my old one moved) and cancelled my upcoming appointment. I again hunkered down for the next few days of hell that I knew were coming. I have to admit, even though I had done it before, this time I was a little anxious because I was doing it alone... or so I thought.
Day one wasn't so bad. I went to work as usual, but was drained by the time I got home. I started to have muscle aches so I decided I better go to the store and load up on the things I will need for the next few days. Then night came. That's when it hit. I had all the flu symptoms.... achy muscles, temp swings, sweats. I was able to finally get a couple of hours of sleep with the help of some prayer and melatonin
Day two I woke up with the same symptoms and now my GI tract was out of whack and vomiting ensued. I took some Imodium, loaded up on vitamins and forced myself to eat and drink. It was easy to keep it down, but I believe the fluids and nutrition helped allot. I spent the whole day in bed and the bath tub soaking in epson salts. That night little sleep came but depression sure did
Day three was the worst. Needless to say, I did allot of praying that day It took everything for me to just get out of bed to take a hot bath, which helped tremendously. Luckily, I was prepared and had bottles of water and food bedside, so I didn't have to move around allot.
Day four, wow what a difference. Things were starting to look up.. I even went ice skating breifly! (dont ask what brought than on). I began to get my mental clarity back, and even found myself laugh at something out loud. I was still drained of energy, but some of the bone and muscle aches had subsided somewhat.
From there on it is history... Its amazing that it only took three little days of physical hell to undo the imbalance that took about 6-7 months to build up inside me.
I am done with those evil little pills, and will never look back. I have absolutely NO DESIRE to take one of them again! When I say "evil" I dont mean to put a negative connetation on the pills themselves. They were just evil to me I know that many people are very much in need of pain medacine, I just dont think for me they are necessary. I am feeling better today than I have for months. I cant say that I am 100% yet, but each day is getting better and better.
I think going "cold turkey" takes an amazing amount of resolve... but it can be done! For me, it was an easy decision because I was able to see the distruction it caused my life.
I would encourage anyone who is in a similar situation to reach out to God for guidance... even if you are not a person of faith. I know the desperation this dependence can cause, so what do you have to lose by trying? I'm just saying.. it helped me
Here are a few tips to prepare yourself for the "journey". I am not a medical doctor by ANY means, but simply sharing what worked for me.
1. Stock up on good food and bottled water. I say bottled water because if I had to get up to get water, I wouldn't of drank it. Just keep large quantity bedside and keep telling yourself to drink it. The upset GI can cause you to get dehydrated, which will compound the pain. Though eating was difficult and forced, I do think it made me feel better overall. If you are on a diet... break it! I ate chocolate which has natural endorphins and it helped. Also get some bananas, the potassium helps combat the restless legs.
2. Get some vitamins supplements, and OTC remedies. Use a good multivitamin in the morning. Melatonin at bedtime helped me get the sleep that I did. Its natural and not habit forming. If you don't get bananas, get some potassium gluconate. I also found a product called "hylands restful legs". That stuff worked wonders! Ibuprofen can be used to help with the aches, and Imodium is your GI's best friend.
3. Get some Epsom salt! I cannot stress enough the benefits of soaking in a hot tub with salts! While in the tub it took away most of the symptoms and continued to do so for about 20-30 minutes afterwords. Spend your entire day in the tub if you have to! Just be sure to wash off with clean water afterwords... the stinky smell got to me when I lied down afterwords.
4. Don't be scared! I think that half the withdrawal demon is the fear of what you know whats coming. Just keep telling yourself that it will pass, and you will be better than ever when it does. In a way I "enjoyed" my cleansing. I kept thinking about how going through this pain was the best investment I could make in myself. You are worth it!
5. Keep a positive attitude. I was very hard on myself in the beginning. I had allot of feelings of shame that I let this happen. DONT! Its sooo counter productive. I realized this halfway though and it made an amazing difference when I stopped.
6. Make sure you plan a few days for recovery where you don't have any major responsibilities to tend to. I can imagine that the temptation to take another pill would increase if I was not physically able to fulfill my responsibilities. I worked on day one, and though it was difficult, I got out and did things by day four. Day two and three at work would not of been an option for me.
And there you have it! If I can do this, so can you! It was a struggle and fight to get my body back.... now I can start the fight to get the rest of my life back (and its worth the fight)!
Thanks for reading, I apologize for the length. I just wanted to share all the details, as I can imagine some of us come to the same conclusion based off similar situations. I hope that my success can help encourage someone else in need.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
