just curious?
 

Alcohol is everywhere. I walk by it every time I go grocery shopping. It's always around at family get-togethers, restaurants and sporting events. It’s in my house. If I really wanted to I could get into my mom’s stash and get blasted.

I personally have no reason to hang out in bars, but just because someone goes to one doesn't mean he/she is setting him/herself up for failure. It depends upon the individual. I know what my triggers are (and that can change depending upon my mood) so I stay away from the things that would set me off.

I Would have to agree in principle..its not the best place to hang out if your stopping drinking, for one thing hanging out with drinkers,whilst your cold stone sober..you are on a different wave length anyhow...there comes a time were you would likely feel out of sought,Alienated from the pack...and thus tempted to partake..i think..like we all like to fit in.

You know, its not bars and alcohol that get alcoholics drunk: its alcoholism. Seems all so obvious, that we try to control our alcoholism this way and that way. Do this and don't do that. At the end of the day, alcoholics are either getting into a sober way of living or they are getting back into another drinking experience. Getting sober is not rocket science. Staying sober is more than just not drinking and staying away from bars. There are no hard and fast rules for what not to do except one that I know of: don't drink alcohol. After that simple truth, its all about personal choices to do with sincerity and quality of wanting to live a sober spiritual life as we are free to choose for ourselves in our everyday life going forward. Or not.

RR

For years I worked in the hopsitality industry.

When I wanted to quit drinking....I did not want to change
jobs. I was also a bar drinker....wanted to hang
there too ...but not drink......:laughing:
Drat! that not work for me....I kept going back to drinking.

I found an office job....connected back to my God
AA friends. Step work was vital for me.

Certainly I've been to bars and restaurants that serve drinks.
Also weddings...parties and events.
I've left sober each time.....:yup:

In the book....Alcoholics Anonymous there are directions
and suggestions on how to deal with drinking situations.

I don't recommend it to newcomers at all....and I don't go to them if I have any other alternatives as they're no longer places I enjoy.

but as a musician - if I want to play professionally chances are I'm gonna find myself in a bar sooner or later.

I agree with Robby - my problem is alcoholism not alcohol or bars.

D

Agree with Dee: a really bad idea for newcomers. Like going on a diet and then hanging out at BaskinRobbins watching all your friends eat ice cream..... (only that's not a life/death decision!)

The Big Book suggests we check our motives and our spiritual condition before being around alcohol. If we have a good reason for being there (e.g., office holiday party), and we aren't on shaky ground, spiritually, there's no reason to avoid it.

I've never felt like drinking from being around alcohol, but I find it boring to be around people who are drinking. I'd rather be home reading a good book, or doing something else. I usually make an appearance, socialize for a bit, and leave as soon as I'm decently able to.

But I think it's generally wise for people in early recovery to avoid bars and drinking occasions as far as it's possible to do so, and to always have a backup plan--a way to leave if you need to, some phone numbers of sober friends you can call if necessary.

I rarely drank in bars, 99% of the time home by myself, so bars are no trigger for me since I don't go there anyway. And since getting sober, drunk people bore and irritate me but it doesn't make me want to drink. What I had to get used to was being around myself sober. I had to trust myself to stay sober, even tho no one else was in the house who would know... but I would know...

Nice to be able to trust myself again.:)

Unless they are meeting a friend and having coffee or soda instead, I don't see why they can't go. My husband and I had dinner at a pretty empty restaurant last week and the bar seemed bigger than the dining area... but I didn't even look twice at the bar. Went straight to our table and never took a second glance over. I wasn't interested. Had coffee instead. No matter where you are, there are temptations and alcohol all over. We have to be prepared to come face to face with those temptations all the time. If you know you're walking into a bar and do not want to drink, don't.

I think it is a really bad idea for newcomers to hang out in a bar but like Bambozle said alcohol is everywhere. I think it is important to learn youor triggers. One of mine is college football. Another is a casino (I relapsed twice in a casino). Someone else said to check your motives. Why would you want to hang out in a bar? If it is just to live vicariously through others then this is a very bad motive.

I don't know about every other alcoholic, but personally I avoid bars and drinking parties. I have a little over 3 months sober and I don't see myself hanging out in bars in the future. The only reason I ever went there was to drink. If a band I love is playing at a venue that is mostly a bar, I might consider that in the future but not this early in sobriety. If I have to go to a happy hour, say, after a job interview (this happened about 30 days in), I will go but I would rather not.

Ive only ever heard that in AA so...Is it wise for anyone (length of abstinance irrelevant) pre steps to go into a bar? Of course not! Is it ok someone post steps to go into a bar? They can go wherever they want...would they choose to hang around in bars? Not without a good reason because they have been restored to sanity:-)

Personally if i wanted to get drunk i can do that anytime and anywhere...would i choose to hang round in bars like i used to drink in...id go toawine bar or a nice club with seats with good friends if the occasion arose and it has but no way im standing with heavy drinkers with me holding an OJ...man i tried that so many times before and it is as boring as hell lol

Like several have already said I didn't go to bars when I was drinking why would I go to them now? My wife keeps a bottle of scotch for her in the house, doesn't have anything to do with me. She drinks her two in the evenings in front of me, no issue. My actual real friends aren't alcoholics and certainly don't hang out in bars, and most don't drink, but a few will have a single drink they will nurse all night. With them I'd have a few and finish getting my buzz on at home. Not because I was hiding anything, but because I didn't want to drive drunk or when my wife was with me she wouldn't want to stay late. There were a few from work that were binge drinkers on the construction crews and when the company held a night out we made an appearance and split as soon as we said hello to everybody, and before they started getting loud and obnoxious. And that was when I was drinking!

Besides I can buy a case for what a few drinks cost in a bar.

In retrospect, I spent about 3 months setting myself up for drinking (and using) again after 4 years clean/sober.

In addition to other factors, I started hanging with a chronic relapser. We'd go to the local bar and shoot pool, while I thought I was clever just drinking Pepsi.

Eventually 4 years went out the window.

I was blessed to make it back into recovery. Many don't.

As with most situations I think it depends on the person, being around alcohol does not tempt me at all, quite the opposite it rather disgusts me. I wasn't that fond of bars when I was drinking due to the noise/smell/gropers so I wouldn't be found hanging out there now. However, if there is a reason for going to the bar other than drinking aka good food/music then I go and it's fine.