eremc08

Here I am.. again! I tried to keep coming on here but with taking care of the kids and the house and all their sports.. I just have NO time to do it.

SO.. I'm going to make a better effort this time and come on here whenever I need to, no matter where I am. (there's always my slow a** phone)

Day 1 for me today. It's a rainy gloomy day, which is kinda how I feel right now so it suits.

Hello everyone and I'm glad to be back! Just hope I'm back for good this time.

Anna

Welcome back!

I'm glad you are committed to your recovery.

It's SO important to make time for yourself, even for a few minutes, to focus on you and your recovery.

Draciack

Welcome back

Kjell

It's important to never stop trying for sure!

I had a few "false" starts myself and they were horrible. One ended up with a dui charge

Looking back, after each relapse...my best thinking came up with "I'll try harder", which ultimatly never really worked as I never really changed who I was. See..the same me will drink again...maybe this is true with you too?

My recovery really picked up when I got involved and actually participated in my own recovery...what a concept!

AA, SR, and outpatient therapy changed my life and gave me the tools to change who I was. I'm now sober for almost 10 months.

I beleive I found a solution to my alcoholism. I hope this post helps you to find yours too.

eremc08

Thanks! I'm going to get more involved in my recovery. I don't think I really gave it my all last two times. The first time I did but then thought just one drink would be ok.. Boy was I wrong!

I need to stop fooling myself. I have to put my life into recovering and just know that I can't drink, not even once. I have to live a non alcoholic recovered life from this day on.

Kjell

I just noticed your signature and man(!) - that really says it all.

I was told that if I put my recovery first, everything thing else would fall into place and that has been my experience thus far.

NEOMARXIST

For me then truly accepting I'm an alcoholic was crucial in me staying sober and still is. I have no shame in referring to myself as an alkie or addict. It helps me to always remember it as there is booze two minutes walk away and costs less per litre than bottled water in UK!! So I need to know that I'm an alkie and druggy on a daily basis and have no shame in that.

It then goes so much deeper than that and is where the real work starts of working on the underlying causes and problems and also changing your attitude to be positive, healthy and full of gratitude. This is where practicing a recovery program of some form really helps.

For me then I only drank until it was all gone or I was unconscious so moderation was never in my vocabulary to be honest.

Recovery for me has to be practiced in my daily life and indeed is a new way of living and thinking. If I slacked off in my recovery then I suspect it wouldn't be long until the old alkie ways would slip back in again. I believe it to be a daily reprieve along similar lines to what is written in the BB of AA.

All The best, Peace

least

I hope this is your last Day One.

eremc08

Thanks everyone! This is really helping me get through this tough day 1. I'm very grateful!

ChangeIsGood123

Welcome back. The time that you spent drinking, come here instead! Day one will turn into day two, etc etc etc.

grateful2b

Erem, I am glad you are back!

Fandy

I guess I will ask THE question...what are you going to do differently this time? how will you focus on your recovery, what is your plan?

eremc08

I'm going to come here everyday, no matter what busy things I have planned that day. Take it one day at a time, and I'm not going to let myself fool myself into thinking I can be someone I'm not. I can control not drinking, but I cannot control moderate drinking, or drinking at all.

Fandy

do you recognize your triggers? (mine are not sleeping and heavy stress, my worst time i would want to drink are between 3AM-7AM on a weekend if I couldn't sleep.)

eremc08

Stress is always going to be there so I need to find something else to replace the alcohol. Dinner time when everyone is home and the boys are running around while I'm cooking makes me drink.. I used to have wine while cooking..

nytecomm

Happy first day! You can do it. Easy does it!

bellakeller

I am really glad you made it back here. I have to put recovery first in my life otherwise I'd lose everything else. That means even putting it in front of my kids and husband as a priority. What a weird concept for me to grasp but so far it's working one day at a time. I no longer have to drink in front of my kids or sabotage my relationship with my husband as long as I first don't drink.

SSIL75

Welcome back! I was wondering about you the other day, actually. Good to 'see' you.

eremc08

Yes, I need to make this a priority. Which will be hard for me because I always put my kids first.

Harry01854

Welcome back eremc and hopefully you can move forward from here. I really can't add anything more than what others have shared, all I can do is repeat. I have to admit though, repetition helped me a lot. The more I heard it, finally it sunk in.

It is very important to do something different this time. Pretty evident that what you had done before didn't work. I realize that just living life is pretty hectic and gets pretty chaotic at times and of course can keep us busy. But it is important, very important, to put my recovery before anything else, including my wife. Without recovery, everything else disappears anyway. That's what alcohol will do, erase everything and everybody we love.

Just do it for today, one day at a time. Coming here to read other's experiences can give you hope. Sharing your own experience can and will help you and can also help others also.

So keep coming and whatever you do, "just don't drink."

God bless,

Harry