abnheel

I am headed to bed, but this is something I recalled as being something that bothers me frequently. This might not be the forum for it, but I'm not sure where else to post it.

There are times where I feel that I need to revisit painful experiences from deployments overseas. For example, not deployments to Afghanistan, but places where I can go back with my wife (Korea, Kosovo, etc) and view where some of my pain originated.

An example would be a base in Korea where I was when the September 11th attacks occurred. While it was morning in the States, it was evening for us. Then there is Bosnia and Kosovo. All of these places are peaceful now, but I find myself afraid of revisiting them. There isn't a reason why other than my emotional well-being was sacrificed for what I believed was necessary.

If you are former military, I'd like to get your opinion on what I'm thinking about.

Itchy

Retired military here, and you are describing PTSD to a T. Whether you tag it survivors guilt or whatever, we all have a little of it even those who never fired a shot. We can feel as badly about what we didn't do as well as what we did. Since you are on these forums dealing with that is part of the 12 steps (Especially steps 2-7) insofar as letting go to your higher power, and but in this case some additional counseling with specialists in PTSD is what I would do. If you are retired or out of service the VA has a lot of very good counseling in those arenas, and you qualify as long as you didn't get a dishonorable on your DD214.

Why do you think some of the warriors from Japan, Germany, and America meet as friends many years later because they shared the same experiences, just from different sides?

Good luck! See several counselors if the first doesn't click with you.