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Old 10-11-2010, 08:53 PM   #1 (permalink)

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New member, newly sober, help!

Hello all,

So I have been a heavy binge drinker for *this is so hard to admit* about 5 years, starting before I even turned 21. Every weekend my friends and I go out and drink, and every vacation is turned into a binge drinking fest. My husband drinks, however nothing compared to me, and he is definitely not an alcoholic. I just realized recently that I can't believe how much I can drink.... I have no control of myself. If I have just one drink, I have to keep drinking. I have had 2 or more bottles of wine in a night, and it used to be on the weekends but over the last year has been creeping into my week. I really need some encouragement, and it is so hard to tell anyone this... I've been hiding it a lot, even from my husband sometimes. Anyone have any advice or words of encouragement for my first week? I have tried to quit before, but never told anyone, and now I told my husband I am quitting so I am trying to take control.
I just feel so very anxious and tired and depressed. Alcohol is what makes me enjoy things now, and since it has been years since I have taken more than 5 days off drinking, I am afraid it might be a while until I can enjoy anything anymore...
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Old 10-11-2010, 09:01 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Hi GradStudent Welcome to SR

Detox can be tough, if you're concerned seek a medical professional.

One day at a time worked for me, especially the first month, but having a recovery program (AA for me) and a support system (AA and SR) worked wonders too.

Stick around. You'll find a lot of support here.
Jim Rohn: The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keep out the joy
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Old 10-11-2010, 09:08 PM   #3 (permalink)

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You'll find support here and welcome Many of us had that same experience of hiding our drinking or having one drink and not being able to stop. You're not alone.
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Old 10-11-2010, 09:13 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Ditto what Draciack said. The day I knew I couldn't drink anymore if I wanted to have any control over my life, I went to AA and logged onto That was over 6 months ago and I haven't had a drink since. The support I receive from both is fantastic, and I'm also lucky enough to have a great fiancee, family and friends to back me up as well.

My advice to you is to seek support and strength wherever you can find it. Also, don't think too far into the future, whether it's only 5 days or a month or a year. Just focus on not drinking JUST FOR TODAY, and do that same thing every single day. The future can seem daunting, but today is something we can handle.

Good luck to you, and thanks for joining us. There are some great people here with many combined years of experience and support to share with you.
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Old 10-11-2010, 09:14 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Telling him was a big first step. I couldnt stop until I confessed to my GF. I hid it all the time.
First week is the worse, as advised get medical attention if it gets too bad. For me, cravings and wanting got a lot easier after that week. First 10 days went real slow, but after that time returned to normal. Being tired and anxious is also normal, both caused by the alcohol. This too shall pass. Posting and reading here helped a lot. Many people also do AA or Smart or another face to face.
Keep posting and know that we are all pulling for you.

Week 15
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Old 10-11-2010, 10:31 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Hi GradStudent.

Lots of good advice here - particularly about the's best to always get some medical advice on that.

I know you'll find a lot of support here too, and a lot of understanding.
We know what it's like

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Old 10-11-2010, 10:52 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Welcome Grad! You have our support and lots of info and experience here.

I can tell you that sobriety is achievable and you can go on to live a healthy amazing life without alcohol. I see a lot of myself in what you write. I too found that I just couldn't stop when I started.

Glad you are here and wanting a healthier life now.

Looking forward to the journey.

“Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Old 10-12-2010, 03:51 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Old 10-12-2010, 04:07 AM   #9 (permalink)
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
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....Welcome to our recovery community

Congratulations on heading into a sober future
Sober does not necessarily mean boring or glum...
Each Day Sober Is A Victory!!
Joy In AA Recovery!

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Old 10-12-2010, 05:35 AM   #10 (permalink)
rode hard and put away wet
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The hiding hurt me more than the drinking sometimes. I knew I wanted to be a person of integrity but sneaking around didn't square with the person I wanted to be. If I was sneaking or dishonest in any way, I might as well be drunk because it was the alcohol dictating me; not me controlling it. So much crazy and so much effort.

Once I got sober and quit having to hide, I found so much relief.

Keep coming back.
I took month-long vacations in the stratosphere and y'know it's really hard to hold your breath
And I swear I lost everything I ever loved or feared, I was the cosmic kid in full costume dress. ~Springsteen
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Old 10-12-2010, 07:06 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Welcome to SR. You'll find lots of support and useful info here. I'm glad you found us.
I'd rather live in my car with my dogs than live in a castle without them.

Dogs may not be our whole lives, but they make our lives whole.

Don't wait for the Last Judgement. It takes place every day. -Albert Camus

Find the good and praise it. - Alex Haley
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Old 10-12-2010, 07:34 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Welcome GradStudent!

The most important thing in my life is to stay away from that first drink since it is that first drink that sets up the phenomenon of craving where I cannot predict when I am going to stop or what I am going to do. Believe me, I struggled with this and the progression of alcoholism for years.

AA seems to help me with this and I have managed to put together 2 1/2 years sober- one day at a time.

I wish you well on your journey!
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Old 10-12-2010, 08:05 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Welcome Grad ~ you are not alone. The same thing happened to me; my tolerance level heightened, weekends turned into every other day, then every day and then wine was not enough - I "graduated" to vodka.

Support is crucial in readjusting from a life with alcohol to a life in recovery. So is knowledge about how to do it.

My life was saved by the support of a licensed alcoholism counselor (LADAC) who was also in recovery himself.

It was one-on-one...he helped me understand what was going on with me and gave me the tools on how to readjust my life to one that didn't require alcohol as a crutch for stress and thinking it was the only way to celebrate.

I found him through my community rehab facility. It was outpatient; one night per week for an hour (flexible) and even on a sliding pay scale.

You'll find tremendous support here too. Glad you're with us.
I have never woken up sober and hangover-free wishing I had been drunk the night before.

Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains unawakened.
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Old 10-12-2010, 08:11 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Hello and welcome to SR grad . keep coming back you'll fine alot of help here
Faith says that tomorrow is a new day and today is the beginning of it .
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Old 10-12-2010, 10:41 AM   #15 (permalink)
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I binge drank for 30 years. Or, I should say, I started out binging. At times it turned into every day. All day, for days. But whenever I took that first drink, it wouldn't stop.

What scared me sober once, was going into mild withdrawal. At the time I thought I had it under control, because I made the decision to drink every other day, instead of evey day.
Dind't turn out too well for me.

I'm an alcoholic, and that's what alchoholics do; drink.

You have nothing to be ashamed about. Now, nine months sober I have no regrets. I had a lot of fun drinking, until it progressed where I would drink alone just to get drunk.

Believe me, it only gets worse.
Just try and not pick up that first drink. That's very important

You are certainly not alone in your problem. Many of us have been where you are.

Welcome to SR, and best to you!
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