bellakeller

I just have a year and some change.

meblonde

Good for you!!!

zbear23

My first attempt at recovery in 1985 started with treatment at an excellent rehab. I stayed sober for nearly 5 years. Once i relapsed, it seemed I'd never get sober again. In and out, in and out of recovery for the next five years. I was a member of AA, went to meetings, had a sponsor, etc.....but when it came to the Steps, I deceived myself into believing that I had been "fearless and thorough." I'd not yet overcome my desire to find that easier softer way, to try half measures. They availed me nothing.

Finally, beaten down enough, sleeping on the floor of a church, I had my pride torn out of me and was blessed with enough desperation and humility to reach out for help....to be willing to actually "go to any lengths" to stay sober. I stopped trying to think my way out of my insanity and delegated most of my thinking to those better able to do it...those who actually were recovered.

In the beginning of the Big Book the original AAs describe themselves as "having recovered from a SEEMINGLY hopeless state of mind and body." And I found out there was truth to the AA belief that "no human power could relieve my alcoholism." I'm not sure if I actually turned my will and my life over to "god as I understood him," but I do know I turned it over to AA...to my sponsor, home group, the Steps, the fellowship, etc.

It worked.

I haven't had a drink since 1995, and believe it or not....just as Bill wilson claimed.....my thinking has got better.<G>

But that took time...in my case, probably about three years before I was confident in once again trusting my own thinking..... because the brain heals slowly.

blessings
zenbear