firestorm090

I don't know if this will help or not, but I'm going to post here first to see if it does.

I have 15 days without a drink today and earlier today a lady called me and invited me to join her for a few drinks tonight. We dated before and had fun, but she wants more than I am willing to offer. Earlier I told her that I was staying home tonight and thanks for the invite. She just called again and said she's waiting and will wait till closing at 2am if I change my mind.

Here's the problem. I want to shut off this computer and go, but I know I will hate myself if I do. I'm sick inside and I know a few drinks will quiet the urge, will temporarily provide an escape from sitting here and looking at this screen while wanting to be with her, but not wanting to be with her.

It's crazy, so I thought I'd try posting about this first. I know if I go, then all is lost again, I just know that, but I want to go anyway.

Well, that's the truth and I'm not sure what I'll do, so here I sit.

Saliena

Hey Firestorm...

I didn't have THAT battle.. .but, a similiar battle this week. I went grocery shopping... and I ended up by my favorite section (the wine). I picked a bottle up... I put the bottle down... I picked it up. Walked around the store with it... my internal battle RAGING... At the end of it.. I gave up... I walked out of the store... left the food and the cart.

If you could go out and stay strong and not drink. Then I would say go for it. But, it sounds like you know you can not do that. Don't sell yourself short. You started this journey for a reason... stick to it! You can do it! If you want to I will send you my phone number. Maybe we can get each other through it. It is TOUGH as HELL. But, we have known and know it can work.

You lose your soberity when you pick up your first drink. So, go to bed... go to sleep.. and wake up tomorrow in a better place. Don't sell something as important as your soberity for something that is as fleeting and will make you feel like an ass tomorrow.

Saliena

Ghostly

Well fire, you know you should stay. You know that would be better for you. I hope you find the strenght to do what is best for you.

Dee74

Dallas
You know what will happen if you do.
Like I said that's a lot to bet...

It really is time to try something different.
Not only posting here - ring some AA numbers.

You can change your life - and make it the kind of life you want - or you can go round and round in the old one Dallas - it's up to you.

and is this the same friend from previous occasions? cut this friend free D - you're not doing each other favours.

D

LadyLuck

Firestorm,

Good thing you posted about this a couple of hours ago so you know where your head and heart were at instinctually! Now go back, reread your post, stay with your initial feeling and stay strong!

What will you gain by going?! What will you lose? You already know the answer...

Be well.

LexieCat

Dallas,

Now what kind of idiot stunt would that be?

I hope you were looking for the proverbial kick in the ass, because that's what you need when you start thinking like that.

You are looking for an excuse.

firestorm090

Thanks everyone, I'm not going to go, so I have to chain myself to this seat till past 2 am.

I think I'm thinking with the wrong head, lol

firestorm090

Oh, that's nice, her girlfiriend just called and I didn't answer. Well, time to shut the phone off.

LexieCat

Good!

Sheesh, I thought I was gonna have to come over there and get physical. Might've put you off women for awhile, anyway...

Saliena

Night Dallas... Good luck ... thanks for making the call.

mama36

Dallas...you old SOB...you know where that would have led you. Maybe this friend isn't a great friend if she just wants to drink with you and dink with you...the wrong head is right. Shut little Dallas down for awhile and work on big Dallas. 15 days is a great start...you can do this. Reading your posts tells me all of the time that you are happy when you are sober. You asked who stole your bags the other day...don't go looking for them now. Now sort through the steamer trunks and get on with this journey to permanent sobriety. I agree with Dee, ring some AA number so that you have more support and get on with this.

You can do this...we're all right here with you and from what I see above, there are many of us that can turn you off of women if you need us to.

Good night D...have a good sleep and don't forget to have some ice cold stale cheerios in the morning...it will do you good.

D.

firestorm090

Whewww, that was tough, but I made it through with all of your help. I've shut my phone off, so I'm in for the night.

It's funny how I can know all this good stuff to do, and that there's no answers in the bottle, but with one phone call which promises a initially romantic, then slobbering drunk night of passion and I'm all flipping my gills and wagging my tail like a dog in heat. That just ain't right, lol.

Thanks for saving my butt tonight. Tomorrow will be day 16, and that's hard to believe for this ole drunk.

least

Every time you resist the lure of the lies you get stronger - it's like isometric exercise for the soul. Stay strong. Push back. It gets better.

Kmber2010

Well done FS. Sometimes even when we don't have the answer....coming on here and posting and just sitting....reading responses....can help us make the right decision.

Good work!

Fandy

think about this...YOU changed how you dealt with temptation, new habit, better results!...(no one said it is easy though)...good sober thinking.

LadyLuck

Good work. Day 16 and your resolve has grown stronger. Do something nice for yourself today.

mama36

D - Happy day 16...you CAN do this you old SOB...lol

D.

Saliena

Hey Dallas!

Yeah for day 16... While I don't know what today will bring. I can say that it is made better by the fact that you didn't wake up with a headache that takes 10 days to get rid of! Call me anytime. Hope you have a wonderful weekend.

S.