LaFemme

Hi All!

I am asking for some advice on how to handle money. I am 2+ months sober now and I'm still having financial difficulties. I don't have any credit cards but I'm having a really hard time getting my money to stretch (I have no idea how I managed when I drank so much, but I know that those days put me into a financial hole).

So I've never really learned how to budget or manage my money, I've always squeaked by. I thought sobriety would have freed up so much cash that I would now be fine, but apparently I am not.

I don't know where the money is going, I don't eat out often, I don't buy clothes, I don't even have a cable bill. It's like I bleed money!

So my question is....how does one become a financially sound person? Can you take a class? Talk to a financial planner? I know this is probably something pretty easy for others, but in the past I have simply worked extra hours when I was short on cash...I don't have a job that allows that now.

Thanks!!!

La Femme.

Anna

One thing that I did many years ago, when I was frustrated about where money was going, was to keep track of every cent for a month. I wrote down every single cent. It gave me a strong framework to begin to budget.

suki44883

It's amazing how much money we spend and don't even realize it. The way I got a handle on it was to list out all my monthly expenses and the dates they are each due. Then I decided which paycheck to be put to which bills. I get paid weekly, so it was a little easier than if you have only two paychecks a month, but you can still do it. Using a Month-at-a-glance calendar allowed me to write what bills need to be paid on which payday, so I could look at it at any time and know exactly what would be coming out of each check. The most important thing is to be diligent and make sure all bills are paid before using any money for other things you don't really need right then.

Also, another thing that can help is to take the change I get and put it in a large jar. Sometimes we forget that all that change can really add up to several dollars in a short amount of time. The other day, I counted the change in my change purse and had over $12.00!! I dumped it in the jar and I probably have around $50 or $60 in there.

Jabbadabutt

Check out the site Save Money - Saving Advice
I have read many great tips from people like you and me who are in the same boat.
On the flip side, if your current employment is not cutting it, you can get a 'second' job somewhere for some extra cash. It may not be you, its just simply more expensive to live nowadays and the salary department has not reflected the inflation rate.

stanleyhouse

That is excellent advice, Anna. Lafemme you are doing one thing very right, you don't have credit cards. You cannot become financially stable carrying credit card debt. When you do start using credit make sure you pay them off every month. I would start a savings account for emergencys and credit over use so that you don't carry a balance. For retirement start putting into an IRA. Once you start setting aside money for saving you will see it add up and think about how it adds up as you spend it too.
It sounds like for the present moment you are having a hard time paying for the necessities. I am sure there is a class or financial assistance available. Many people qualify for assistance but sometimes you need to point it out to the government which programs fit you.
I've seen some of your work, you are an amazing artist.
SH

stanleyhouse

wow, Suki, Jabba and anna give way better nuts and bolts advice than me. I would do averything they suggest.

LaFemme

Thanks so much everyone!

I already work essentially two jobs, since I am always selling my art on the side...many months it brings a little extra in.

I get paid monthly which I think is part of my problem...I've always been paid bi-weekly before and found it much easier to keep things in line.

I used to have a decent savings portfolio but because of the economy and my drinking it's pretty much gone:-(

Jabba, I will check out that site.

I don't actually have that many monthly bills...rent, electric, Oil and water...and I often have to skip a month for electric or water to pay for necessities.

I really don't understand how I did it with the booze, although I think a lot of my problems are spillover from before...now I just need to get on track. I like the idea of tracking every cent...yikes!!!!

leo21

Jabba beat me to it, but yeah that website is very good and full of people who know personal finance. I've been lurking on that site for a couple years but gotta fix....me...first before tackling the finances.

I would also recommend heading to your library and check out books on personal finance, like Dave Ramsey, etc.

Fandy

you must be using your "disposable income" somewhere???

I'm with Anna on tracking all of your bills (and their due dates)...It's $$ in vs. $$ out.(kind of like dieting).

it is more difficult when you only get paid once a month and it's helpful to have a little padding for emergencies.

thanks for that website info. i will definitely check it out.

one of my "Cheap Tricks" is to pack my lunch and bev./coffee...it save me close to 40-50 bucks a week...which can be spent towards real food for both me and the pets.

Jabbadabutt

Yep - I agree. The ol' lunch out - really adds up on the wallet and the waistline. Cook more food at home (dinner) and take it for lunch the next day(s) -- works better than sandwiches which can get pretty old, fast. Nothing like something hot and tasty to hold you over. Getting paid once a month is the worst. Feast to famine in 30 days......or sooner

mama36

There is some really good advice here. Monthly paydays are hard but what I have done is put some of the money from that payday into a separate account, one that I do not have access to with my debit card and then try to forget that it is there. When mid month (or when you would normally need an extra payday) comes around I move the money back to pay for the bills. I do all of my bill paying online and as mentioned above, we put all of our spare change in a HUGE bullet casing and save it. We never touch that money except for when the kids need "hot lunch" change and each Christmas we count it up and use it for that. You would be amazed, but there is normally a nice "chunk of change" in there.

Another thing that I have noticed leaves the bank account looking better...not buying coffee on the way to work every day and not sneaking out on breaks at work and buying coffee. It doesn't sound like much, but for me that is 2+ bucks a day...60 bucks a month can pay for bread, milk and the in between stuff.

Oprah has a great money saving section on her website. I have also done a spreadsheet containing all incoming and outgoing money as well as made up a calendar for the fridge with every bill for every month on it. That seems to help.

LaFemme

I've been trying to bring lunch...now I will double my efforts. I think Janna nailed it about the feast/famine thing...I've been scrimping the last week for awhile now...then I get paid and go a little crazy.

I tend to splurge on "necessities" ie "groceries" a lot of the disposable income has been going towards repairs and items that I have put off buying for ages. My cadilitic convertor thing on my car has needed to be replaced for five months now...was going to do it this week when I realized I didn't havekthe $$$. I knowni joke about Sephora but I don't really shop there...I got the mask as a splurge.

Problem is...I don't really have a lot of disposable income, but there are people with less who can makenends meet.

I am going to start posting my art on eBay...if I could sell a few more paintings a month I would be better...at the end of the day I k ow this ishsomething I need to work on big time.

Getting sober is about so much more than not drinking...its about growing up and dealing with life! Happily, I have no desire for a drink...I realize that wouldn't help and I can't afford it anyway!!!

LaFemme

Yup to the breakfast coffee...need to buy some milk and sugar so that I can make it myself in the am.

I already know the spare change trick..I've bought more than one bottle of wine that way!

LaFemme

Oh...candy...one thing I am bad about re disposable income is books...although I have cut down a lot I haven't cut out completely. Maybe if I go back and read all the books sober that I read drinking it will be the same as buying a new book...lol!

Supercrew

It looks as if you have received a ton of good advice LaFemme. The only other ideas I might add after you did a run down and list every bit of money you spend in a month, (I did this about 6 years ago and it was eye opening, and it got me back on track), the other thing to look at if you really only have utility bills and rent would be how much you are paying for your rent. I have no idea what you make, or how much your rent is, but if rent is taking more than 25% of your income you might have an issue and might look for a more affordable alternative. Just an idea.....but the money tracking thing should give you a good idea of why you seem to be a little short in the wallet.

Antiderivative

Like others have said, start keeping records.

Additionally, put money aside every month that you get paid. I don't know what you can afford, but put $50-$300 aside a month or more and don't touch it. Preferably in an IRA, a safe interest yielding account, or a safe stock.

Force yourself to stretch your finances after you put some money aside.

Fandy

you might appreciate a "treat" more if you save for it....like someone said, $2.00 a day for coffee is $60.00 a month....i still throw a few bucks in a jar every week along with the change.

you've put the brakes on the booze and empty spending you can make a great lunch for under $2.00 at home...(salad with protein like leftover chicken and a slice of cheese), another plus is if YOU make it, you know exactly what is inside it....no nasty extra fats or weird meats....i make a microwave veggie omelette every day and place it on an english muffin with a slice of cheese or ham....and a container of microwavable soup is only $1.50 at wally-mart....along with a piece of fruit and a kashi bar it's more than enough food to have for lunch. a bag of baby spinach lasts me all week....its a great lettuce substitute.

coffeenut

Having no credit card debt is seriously awesome. Lots of great ideas to get you right on track.

I understand the book thing....but really, try the library. If they don't have the one you want, often they can get it through 'inter library loan'. You'll save a BUNCH!

wpainterw

How about medications? I've found that I save $2,000 per year by getting my meds by mail from the outfit which runs my insurance plan rather than at a retail pharmacy. Like the eyedrops which cost over $100 for 45 days supply and which are available from the insurer for about $30. It's a scandal that the drug companies jack up the price so much for the small retail pharmacies but that's the way it is.
Also let me weigh in on the side of saying "Beware of credit cards! If the booze doesn't get you then the credit cards will!". And beware of strangers calling you on the phone and offering you a "sure thing". You'll probably get a "sure thing". They'll hoover your wallet for sure!

W.

stanleyhouse

So much good advice. On a more spiritual level, when I come across something I want that I have the money for I have been saying to myself "I pass". It is not the fancy car or great bag that will make me happy, but for me it takes conscious effort to remember that phrase. It didn't work when I saw the most fabulous monogrammed wellingtons.
And lately I have been doing what someone else suggested and putting my money in ING and only taking it out to pay bills, therefore keeping the checking account very low.
SH