LexieCat

Julez,

Sorry about the slip. It happens to a lot of people in the beginning, and even to a lot of people with some time in. What I think it demonstrates is that you can't just go by how you're feeling, to judge whether you are about to slip. I've had a couple of friends who got sober when I did slip--one a few months ago, and one more recently. Neither one of them saw it coming.

Anger and fear trip up a lot of people. Maybe you were feeling a little "bulletproof" after your derring-do getting through the wedding festivities.

This is serious business, and I'm glad you're back here and ready to get back down to it.

artsoul

HI Julez - :ghug3 Please do be kind to yourself and patient too. Take it one day (one thing) at a time. A few more sober days and you'll feel much better about things.

Is there anything you can do to minimize your interactions with mom for now? You're dealing with a lot of stuff for early sobriety. I still feel pretty new at this even after 4 months, so don't beat yourself up. You chose to come back here and begin again. That takes guts and honesty (so pat yourself on the back for that). What we're doing isn't easy and there's a lot of people who have fallen off and never come back. Glad that isn't you!!

alexvt

Hey Julez, Don't beat yourself up! Be proud of the 1 month of sobriety and only one day drinking. Thats a BIG accomplishment!
I did the same thing and then kind of stopped counting days and really got lost. I am back and on day 9.
Just keep posting and counting days and you'll have 2 months before you know it!

SweetCityWoman

Julez - Walk this path with me. I am on day 13 and been down this road before. Insight is good, getting back on the sobriety horse right away stops the downhill slide which is good and sharing with people here is a good decision and a brave one to admit you slipped. I bet if you search this forum for the word "relapse" you would close down the entire site! So you are now moving forward and I am going the same direction and am arms length - reach out and you will be able to touch me. I am here.

wpainterw

Julez: Sad you had to go through all that! Lots of similarly very nasty stuff happened to me when I was drinking and also when I got some years in sobriety. In the drinking years I used it as a way of explaining to myself "why" I drank. Like the very tragic deaths of my sister and her son. When I got sober, I began to realize that I could handle all this family screw up so much better when I was sober than when I was drinking. (Like the near breakdown of my relationship with my mother when she decided on her own to go to a retirement community, and, once there, was unhappy and told all her friends that I had put her there against her will- just so I could "get her furniture"- give me a break! That was sooo weird!) Her friends would cuss me out and I would put my dog in the car and hit the road. My doctor also helped me along the way but I made sure he knew I was in recovery so he was very conservative in prescribing. Anyway, as time went on I came to thank my sobriety because if it werent for that I don't think I would have made it through. After 1988 I didn't relapse but before that I was the King of Relapse.
So good luck on getting back on the track.

W.

Zebra1275

Just pick yourself back up. If you fall down 100 times, get up 101 times. Paste this into your browser and watch it

YouTube - To all of you who feel like giving up

This guy has a positive attitue and I find it kinda puts my problems in prespective.

oak

Julez,
I am sorry you are hurting.

Even with a slip, you still have the experience of being sober for a month. You learned skills during the past month and from this slip. You sound like you have lots of insight about what happened which can help in the future.

And yes- it is hard being on day one again! I'm there too. It's humbling.