just want to introduce myself!
 

Hi my name is Laurie and I am new to SR.
Just a little about myself -
Have been drinking for 32 years and my doc has just advised me to stop. I have liver problems...also he thinks peripheral neuropathy in both arms and legs. I have been walking "like a crab" for the last 16 months but have had a brain scan which says my brain is ok!
I have managed to stay off the booze for 29 days and starting to see the light of how much better my life has become.
My situation is.... I would like to continue with drinking but only twice a week. Started off last night with 3 double whiskeys and felt so relaxed that I had, come home again! Now tonight, have managed to control to 3 again but WILL NOT DRINK TOMORROW or the next five days.
Has anyone here been able to go back to drinking again safely after a health scare??
My family and girlfriend have begged me to give up but I think, why should I?? ..I am 57 now, and life is so short, why should I be deprived of my relaxation from a hard day at work. (and the ups and downs of daily living
Am I on the right track?
Your thoughts would be much appreciated.

If you have liver problems, you are most definitely NOT on the right track.

My former husband was diagnosed with EARLY cirrhosis after almost dying during an acute withdrawal, and he was told he'd be fine as long as he never drank again. I did a LOT of research on liver disease, and learned that once liver damage has occurred, you are risking death from the disease unless you stop entirely. Not everyone who drinks heavily will have liver damage--just as not everyone who smokes gets lung cancer. Liver damage is nothing to mess around with.

I, too, was able to "control" my drinking on an occasional basis, but I wasn't able to do it on a consistent basis. I also have a touch of neuropathy in my hands and feet that I believe was caused by drinking--two years later it persists. I think it will never go away. But I think it, too, would have progressed if I had kept drinking.

And the "no brain damage" is a big YET.

I think you are playing with fire if you keep drinking. I'm not a doctor, but your doctor has told you to stop. Why not ask your doctor whether it's OK to drink once a week or so? I have a feeling I know what he or she will say.

Welcome Laurie!

I understand your thinking that you work hard, deserve to chill, life is short, etc.

The problem is that alcohol wants you dead. It doesn't want to just soothe you after a long day or help you celebrate on special occasions.

It appears that way, but its goal is to get you dependent on it, then slowly get you alone and isolated and then take everything from you.
The fascade of the control game is part of the process. I have yet to meet anyone who's been successful at controlling alcohol once their drinking has become a problem.

The drinking problem process has already begun with your health and it seems from your family and GF's concern as well.

My alcoholism counselor told me that the reason why you don't see many people in their 50's in recovery is because they've resigned themselves to the fact that they're too old (ie, life is short). You're never too old to take your life back and make it your own.

If you lived to be 80, would you want to look back on the 23 years you have left as fulfilling by drinking and furthering your health problems? The progression only gets worse until you're left with nothing.

You've been given a wake-up call, Laurie. Please answer it. So glad you're here with us.

If I could finish off your sentence, life is so short, SO MAKE EVERY DAY COUNT.

Best wishes for a speedy recovery from your health issues

Hmmm, your doctor has advised you that alcohol is poisoning you and you should give it up, but you want to reward yourself after a hard day by drinking something that your doctor has told you is killing you, so you come to a sober recovery forum to see if its ok to continue drinking? None of this adds up, I think you already know the answer to your question.

I hope you stay here, learn, and stay sober.

Btw, 3 double whiskeys sounds like a lot to me for an in control, normal drinker.

A liver problem, I'm not a doctor or a medical expert, but if I had a liver problem, I do know that drinking is not going to make it any better. For me, drinking would be a way for me to die.

I myself have already tried managing and controlling. Found out that by controlling, I was only out of control. I to understand about life being so short. I was 56 when I stopped drinking and for nearly 10 years now, I have enjoyed life a lot more for not drinking.

My thought used to be, how can I live and enjoy life withoujt drinking. Now that I think of it, clear thoughts because I'm sober, I wasn't living a life and enjoying it when I was drinking.

As an alcoholic, my thoughts were always to continue drinking and I had many excuses why I should. I wasn't willing to give up my right to drink.

Harry

Sounds like you might want to use your sober time, however brief you plan for it to be, to find other ways to 'reward' yourself that wont kill you. I used a lot of excuses to keep drinking, too. I was being so narrow minded.. but I didn't really know any better. I have no idea if alcohol was causing me health problems, I'm sure that it was.. but I will say that I've never felt better than I have since I've been living sober.

I'm not sure why you're here, we're not too good at supporting active drinking choices. Three doubles? That's three times the 'moderate drinking' amount for men... and a lot of liquor!

Maybe for the 5 days you're sober, you'll find some good stuff here to inspire you. Or you wont, and you'll keep drinking and destroying your liver, which is of course your choice.

I said "I wont drink tomorrow" for so long, it almost killed me. Until I started saying "I will not drink today" did things begin to turn around.

Hi Laurie and welcome to SR. It is a great support. Please do a search on the forum for "alcohol moderation" and read others stories. I think it could be helpful to you.

Your sentences seem to contradict one another. Your life is better, but you want to drink 2x per week? Don't get me wrong, I get it and have been there myself. For me it was the alcoholism talking.

I wish you the best for a happy and healthy life, and we are here to help you.

:wink3:

Laurie, if you have liver problems you need to stop drinking. I'm in the same boat. I've had elevated liver enzymes so my doc sent me to a liver specialist. Had a liver biopsy this Tuesday. Thankfully very minimal liver damage, no cirrhosis or fibrosis but I have mild inflammation. Mine can be reversed if I live a liver friendly lifestyle, no alcohol, exercise, proper diet, take my supplements and drink plenty of water. I must stop drinking or it could lead to cirrhosis. Trust me on this, you need to do the same. It's very tough. All of this is new to me. I just found SR this week and plan to stick around here for support. Choose life Laurie.

You will not control your drinking. First it will be 2 days/week then 3 then 4....! If you already have liver damage the only "reward" you're gonna get is a slow, painful death!
DUH!!!!!

You're right, Laurie - life is short, but don't you think alcohol will shorten it even more? I really can't add to what everyone's already said (and after all, it's up to you as far as what you choose to do), but I hope you can hear how your post must sound to most of us here. Just a little quote for thought:

Welcome to SR Laurie
I think you already knew the answers...

I don't know anyone, who having crossed that invisible line, could then go back and 'control' their drinking (3 doubles btw is in excess of moderate drinking standards).

I also don't know anyone who'd rationally make a decision to keep on drinking if it exacerbated health problems...

Life is short. Don't make it shorter Laurie.

Congrats on your 29 days - if I was you I'd go back to that.
D

Welcome Laurie - thanks for sharing your story with us. I was determined to never have to give up drinking all together. For decades I played with it, and it almost destroyed me. Alcoholism is a progressive disease - as HumbleBee said, it's goal is to kill you. If you have liver damage you've most likely been abusing for a long time, even if you don't consider yourself an alcoholic. Your body needs to heal & try to repair itself - there's still a chance that can happen.

My attempts at moderating failed miserably. I tried every trick in the book to make it work. Just drink beer, just drink on weekends, or holidays - all roads led to binges and blackouts. I'm not saying you were ever that type of drinker, but if you've been drinking for 32 years, your body has been badly damaged in many ways. Please reconsider and give yourself chance to get well & enjoy the life you say is better without the booze.

Welcome, I just joined last week, but I'm done drinking. I choose my life and my sons life instead. It is up to you, but you asked.
STOP STOP STOP STOP atleast try please you are slowly killing yourself.:ring

Hi Chassey -

If you are an alcoholic, then moderation won't work.

You are in a life and death situation here. If you weren't alcoholic, then knowing that you had liver problems would certainly make someone abstain.

Given that you aren't willing to abstain, that should tell you something.

And therefore, you can't drink. Circular logic I know, but it is what it is.

Let us know how your moderation plan works this week. Be honest with yourself. Alcohol is cunning, baffling, and powerful. I wish you well.

Chassey7
 

I would like to thank every one who replied to my message.I have taken notice of your replys & doing my best to beat this DEAMON. Kind regards Laurie.

I dont think that anyone who has a problem with alcohol can ever drink safetly again.

I think everyone here knows how you feel at the moment, you are scared for your health but cannot imagine a life without drinking.

I have first hand experience after having given up drinking for a full 3 years, I slipped back into it 3 years ago after some personal problems telling myself that I had proved I was not an alcoholic and would be able to handle it safetly NO NO NO! i am now the same old drunk I was before I stopped. (Read my post titled "I made a big mistake")

I am now on day 3 of not drinking again and this time "deep breath" I will not go back.

I hope you can find the courage and strength to give up altogether, I feel great this week through not drinking and am keeping a diary everyday so that If I do feel the need to drink then I can read about how good I feel when I dont drink.

Good luck,

God bless

Welcome Laurie!
From your post I get the impression that you did not think you had a problem until very recently due to health issues. It takes normally some time to digest that the problem exist and that we cannot control our drinking. I do understand you want to control your drinking if this is the very first time you have quitted.

Stay around and read. It will help you know more about very bad relationships with alcohol and you may want to give a second thought to the fact that even if you manage to control your drinking, you are better off without drinking because your body cannot take it anymore.

Good luck

Hi Laurie, welcome to SR. 3 yrs ago my liver was failing due to a prescription drug overdose I was denied a liver transplant as there was "evidence of alcohol abuse" I was told I was going to die and the "kindly" nurses explained in detail to me what death by liver disease would be like (I'm not a good patient and after 5 days of me pulling out tubes and such they were fed up with me) as they explained it it is just about the worst way to die as it is slow and very painful. With medicine they were able to repair the hole in my liver and I was told I could occassionally have 1-2 drinks but that my liver was weakened and I might not get a another chance. I have no doubt that I could go out today and have just 1-2 drinks and I also have no doubt that in time that 1-2 drinks would be 1-2 bottles. I quit drinking at 50 and the past 3 yrs w/o alcohol have been the absolute best years of my life, I'm now healthier, happier, and in better physical than I was when I was 40. Listen to your girlfriend and family sounds like they love you and want what is best.

I'm new to SR too. Just joined this afternoon after Lurking around as a guest in the different forums. Really good support and info here.
Those are really good posts to Laurie and to anyone else who is thinking the same way.