headly

when |I first quit way back when - 8yrs ago

I asked myself for what? will I fall off for?

to celebrate? what I asked myself is worth celebrating that might lead me backwards in my life progression? is a new job or new car or getting married worth a celebration drink? and if I started drinking everyday again how would that help me celebrate?? a trip to rehab or a few nights of no sleep until I got over it again?

I asked myself which booze might be worth celebrating with? a real nice wine or champagne ? maybe a special whiskey ?

but the scenerio plays out the same no matter..it is not a 1 drink celebration- intoxication is always in the vision - what that tells me is my association of alcohol with intoxication is still there - the 1 drink scenerio is not me

If I were a 1 drink a day person like you hear on the news - a glass of red wine is good for you..... yeah,show me the people that can have 1 drink a day and I will bow to them-congrats !!!!!

I liked the buzz of alcohol- when I felt it, I liked it it more and more until I am in the boozed up gonna be a hangover land of 3-4 glasses of wine or close to a 12 pack after work over the period of 4-5 hours... but that is what I knew,who I was

now I celebrate with good food or sex- usually both - stuff your body needs anyways =)) :ghug3

ElegantlyWasted

Hour ride on my bike if I can squeeze it in. 20 pushups. 3 deep breaths counting to 10 as you exhale. 20 days are great; but I remember at that point I was clueless. All i had really figured out is that i really shouldn't drink, and triggers were everywhere, as my evil mind told me "just one more time". Know that the more time you put in, both quality an quantity, the better it gets. The strength you get from dealing with cravings becomes self reinforcing and begin to dissipate in severity and frequency.

coffeenut

At 20 days in I think it's normal to want to reward yourself in the same old way you always did. Coming here was a Great thing to do!

This thread is really interesting to me....because I don't think so much about rewarding myself anymore. I kinda just appreciate it as it comes.

I think it becomes less about reward and more about satisfaction?

I'm rambling, but I mean well!

Draciack

Hi Dune,

If I have a real bad craving, I like to go to the source of the trigger and break up faulty thinking. For instance, when I was around 30 days sober, I was so angry I could break something...instead I just wanted to drink and drink to obliterate the feeling.

So I broke the thought down:

I'm angry ---> Alcohol relieves anger ---> I have to drink NOW

Then I focused on that middle connection "alcohol relieves anger" and challenged it. If I drank, I'd be even more angry for picking up the drink again. I'd also be ashamed, scared, and confused. There are other ways to relieve anger: exercise, venting, and so forth.

After years of drinking, I had made faulty connections between alcohol and the benefits of drinking. I had to change my thinking and see alcohol for what it really was.

Btw, I had trouble initially with celebrations to. I wanted to hit up bars, get drunk, call up friends...the works. Then one night I realized how sad it was that I couldn't enjoy the accomplishment for the actual accomplishment. Instead, I had to amplify the feeling with alcohol. My alcohol abuse had robbed me of the simple pleasure of enjoying things without a drink.