Day four, now day one.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 44
Day four, now day one.
Hey all,
I had made it all the way to day four, doesn't seem hard to most, but I was really proud. And now I sit here, on day one again. I suppose you've figured out that I failed.
July first came along, and I lost my nerve. I gave into temptation. Luckily however, I stopped at four drinks. I was happy that I was able to stop at all. Anyhow, I feel as though it was all a huge waste. I hated the way it tasted, I hated how it made me feel but most of all I hated myself for screwing up yet again.
Today I woke up thinking, it's not the end of the world. I'll just hop right back up on that horse. That's exactly what I did. I played a long 2 hours of tennis and then a few games of badminton. I feel better than I did before, because now I know that I'm not missing anything. Now, I know that it'll make me feel worse, not better.
I'm sorry I let everyone down, and I am sorry that I let myself down. I suppose I am just writing this to say sorry. I've given advice to people on here and now I feel like a huge hypocrite. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I would give anything to take it back, but I just can't. So now I am going to prove to myself and everyone else that Dianna CAN do it.
Here we go!
I had made it all the way to day four, doesn't seem hard to most, but I was really proud. And now I sit here, on day one again. I suppose you've figured out that I failed.
July first came along, and I lost my nerve. I gave into temptation. Luckily however, I stopped at four drinks. I was happy that I was able to stop at all. Anyhow, I feel as though it was all a huge waste. I hated the way it tasted, I hated how it made me feel but most of all I hated myself for screwing up yet again.
Today I woke up thinking, it's not the end of the world. I'll just hop right back up on that horse. That's exactly what I did. I played a long 2 hours of tennis and then a few games of badminton. I feel better than I did before, because now I know that I'm not missing anything. Now, I know that it'll make me feel worse, not better.
I'm sorry I let everyone down, and I am sorry that I let myself down. I suppose I am just writing this to say sorry. I've given advice to people on here and now I feel like a huge hypocrite. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I would give anything to take it back, but I just can't. So now I am going to prove to myself and everyone else that Dianna CAN do it.
Here we go!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: New York
Posts: 35,731
SURE you can do it! We're all behind you. Like they say tomorrow is another day. Glad to hear you picked yourself up and are starting again. Be proud of that and not your backslide. We've all done that......too many times to count.
Also please don't feel like a hyprocrite your advice was sincere and came from your heart. Just cause you slipped up doesn't negate you good intentions.
Your in my thoughts and prayers. Hold your head up and show this awful monster you can beat it!
Also please don't feel like a hyprocrite your advice was sincere and came from your heart. Just cause you slipped up doesn't negate you good intentions.
Your in my thoughts and prayers. Hold your head up and show this awful monster you can beat it!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: England
Posts: 90
'I had made it all the way to day four, doesn't seem hard to most, but I was really proud. And now I sit here, on day one again. I suppose you've figured out that I failed'
No need to beat yourself up.....you should be proud that you tried, and if you have given advice and encouragement to others, that act of generosity is not lessened because you faltered on your journey. Sometimes your role is to give sometimes you have to take. I hope you are motivated to keep going. Failure would be letting a lapse make you give up altogether. Best wishes xx
No need to beat yourself up.....you should be proud that you tried, and if you have given advice and encouragement to others, that act of generosity is not lessened because you faltered on your journey. Sometimes your role is to give sometimes you have to take. I hope you are motivated to keep going. Failure would be letting a lapse make you give up altogether. Best wishes xx
Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: My world
Posts: 379
Been there, done that, rather not wear the T-shirt, but I do have one.
Don't beat yourself up too much, you did the best thing and got straight back on the horse. And another thing: Very brave of you to tell on yourself.
Don't beat yourself up too much, you did the best thing and got straight back on the horse. And another thing: Very brave of you to tell on yourself.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,380
Many of us had falls, Dianna - it's just like learning to walk the first time.
Look at what happened and why, look at what you could do better or what you can add to your recovery...then draw a line and move on
D
Look at what happened and why, look at what you could do better or what you can add to your recovery...then draw a line and move on
D
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
One nice thing about time is that we can put the past behind us. You found out that drinking again really isn't worth it, and it may very well strengthen your resolve in the future. No one's perfect and as much as it hurts to have to start all over, give yourself credit for stopping right away! 
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 44
Thanks guys for being such a great support! It means sooo much to me to have friends here, who can understand and encourage! You've all made my day SO much brighter, you have no idea. 
We can do this, all of us, and we're most definitely worth it!
All the best and be SAFE!
xo Dianna
We can do this, all of us, and we're most definitely worth it!
All the best and be SAFE!
xo Dianna
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 780
Originally Posted by Dinamic 
Hey all,
I had made it all the way to day four, doesn't seem hard to most, but I was really proud. And now I sit here, on day one again. I suppose you've figured out that I failed.
I had made it all the way to day four, doesn't seem hard to most, but I was really proud. And now I sit here, on day one again. I suppose you've figured out that I failed.
Wandering Student of Life
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: MSP MN
Posts: 126
Dina,
Think of it as just another page in your recovery book that you're writing.... one page/day at a time. Your mind sn't going to let you forget about your slip any easier than ink would vanish off a page - and that might make you feel a slew/variety of negative emotions. But that's okay! Just don't forget to step back and re-focus on the bigger picture: your novel: Dina's Epic Recovery.
Welcome back, and don't beat yourself up. I'm so glad you got yourself to stop at 4 drinks!!! Best of luck and positive vibes your way for this holiday weekend!
Blessed be,
WW
Think of it as just another page in your recovery book that you're writing.... one page/day at a time. Your mind sn't going to let you forget about your slip any easier than ink would vanish off a page - and that might make you feel a slew/variety of negative emotions. But that's okay! Just don't forget to step back and re-focus on the bigger picture: your novel: Dina's Epic Recovery.
Welcome back, and don't beat yourself up. I'm so glad you got yourself to stop at 4 drinks!!! Best of luck and positive vibes your way for this holiday weekend!
Blessed be,
WW
Persevere, Never give up!
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Stellenbosch, South Africa
Posts: 882
Not so bad, i am sure its all a shock to your system, but you were open and honest and thats what counts, first step to healing. If we don't at least try, how do we know we can succeed? and if we fall, we dust ourselves off, pick ourselves up and move on. You can do this !Thinking of you..
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
