I really need to stop
 

i started drinking wine yesterday. was determined to buy only 1 bottle. but after that got my son in law to get me another, under the disguise that i would not be drinking it all myself. after that got the neighbor to take me to dinner, more wine...got home and fell & hurt my hand and banged my head...didnt get up for work this morning...i've gone to counseling before but seems like i am still drinking more than ever...i dont drink every day, but when i do i dont stop...plus the sober days in between are getting shorter so i figure i am on my way to drinking every day.

I'm glad you have decided to stop drinking and recognize that alcoholism is a progressive disease.

You will find lots of information and support here.

Welcome to SR! :hug: I too was a wino and became an all day every day drinker a lot sooner than I thought possible. It was hard to stop drinking but the effort was rewarded by the wonderful possibilities of living sober. There's lots of support and good info here. I hope we can be as helpful to you as this site has been for me.:)

the thing is i know how good i feel when i dont drink. just something takes over and i go get that bottle of wine...and wine is everywhere, in magazines, on tv, everyone is drinking wine! that's my trigger.

exactly! it seems like everyone is drinking but i also know how good i feel when i dont drink. honestly, each day feels a little better...more confident, happy, more "myself"

Hey there, and welcome to SR!

I know what you mean - when you're craving it is as if booze is EVERYWHERE.

If you want to stop, this is a great place to come - loads of people will have gone through what you are suffering now.

You can stop if you want to.

Keep posting!

TodaystheDay,
Not everyone is drinking -- wine or other alcoholic beverages. There are plenty of people who don't drink because of health reasons, because they don't like the taste of alcohol, because they are alcoholic. You don't have to drink. You can take this one day at a time and you can have an entirely new life in recovery. Welcome.
SusanLauren

thanks for the support...i think having a place to go for daily support is key

I'm in the same boat 19 days ago I trashed myself and woke up bloody and bruised. I have not had a drink since and I know how hard it is and I know how your mind rationalizes your drinking for me my head was saying but you really like it so why not drink? you had a busy day don't you deserve to relax? it's really funny how you're head is saying this 27/7 yet somehow the horrible hangover, sick stomach and sore liver,busted lip and bruises seems to be forgotten so easily. not to drink has to be in the forefront it has to be a conscious effort 24/7 but I can say it gets easier with time. I too have the urge to drink when I see it on T.V or I'm around others who are drinking so I feel for you. I wish there was a magic bullet but there's not. just take one day at a time. I started out drinking just beer /wine and ended up with a bad straight whisky habit that in the last 20years progressed to literally gallons of the stuff every week :(
keep posting your feelings do some soul searching and just stop. if you can't do it alone seek help and remember we are all on your side.
Good Luck and Welcome to SR.

my god...you are so right. i'm feeling so sick in my stomach, & my bruised hand is really hurting...and i know in a couple days it will be forgotten...even my grandchildren have told me they dont like when i drink, but i do it anyway. i'm feeling deeply depressed right now, just want to go to sleep and wake up tomorrow feeling better.

I also loved wine. After 11 days it still wispers in my ear you deserve to relax, just one lass, what can it hurt. Every time I turn on the TV and I see a commercial I get the cravings. 2 years ago I got drunk and cut my thumb on a can of tuna, I cut right trough the nerve and could not go to the emergency room. I went the next day and thank god my thumb was okay. I still have not my feeling back, but it did not stop me. I hurt people over and over, especiall the ones I care about. I sent emails and made calls to people. The next day I regreted the emails sent, however you cannot take them back.I hit rock buttom 11 days ago and since them I am fighting..... but there is hope and only if you give up trying is when you lose...... So keep trying

yes, for some reason tv, magazines, seem to use wine as a decorating technique...like it's sofisticated to have a bottle of wine on the table...i am praying that i can say i've been sober for more than a week....

it's a sad cycle to be caught up in:( listen to your body and get some sleep and be good to yourself. when you are feeling better make your sobriety #1 and be selfish about it lol that's what I did the first week it was me me me and more me I took some time off to just focus on purging myself of the poison and putting my health first and lots of soul searching. I found that once I stopped neglecting myself and being kind to me that I'm eating better getting more exercise my mind is clear and Dammit I want to live not simply exist. I am also a lot nicer for family members to be around.:) the cravings will come and go mine only lasted 20 mins at a time then it was gone and everyday that I woke up I felt proud of not giving in to the poison and ready to live another day. I made myself a list of drinking pro's and con's and hung it on the fridge and when I had the urge to drink I would read it to remind myself that there are many more con's to drinking than there are pro's it really helps me to see it in black and white.
you can do this!!

i really like your posts, as they are really hitting home with me...i did have a pro & con list months ago, but it got lost in my wallet...i think the con list is much longer now...i hope you are around this weekend....i normally have a 4th of july bbq, but am thinking of cancelling it this year, too much temptation....

Well I started with wine too. Over time it got to be everyday, and to go the cheaper route, I started buying the boxes of wine! Then I got sober for 4 years but quit going to meetings and staying in touch with my fellow alcoholics so of course I relapsed. This time I went straight to vodka. It doesnt get better it gets worse! I'm almost at 30days sobriety and I feel better than ever. If you havent tried AA, I highly recommend it. I go almost everyday and love it! It can be intimidating at first but stick around long enough and you'll see we're all the same when it comes to alcohol. Good luck!

Posts like this remind me that I am powerless of alcohol. Maybe this is true with you too?

I've been avoiding situations that are too tempting also at least until I can trust myself which in all honesty may be quite awhile. I figure I didn't get to the bottom over night so it will take a while to pull myself out of this alcoholic haze I have been in for so many years.
I personally never gave quiting any thought however I did cut back because of this person or that person never because I was ready for me that's where things changed I started drinking to get rid of hangovers bad move. I was so tired of feeling like I was on deaths door and thinking to myself that I have spent over 30 years either getting drunk or being hungover then drinking again. the wasted life is my biggest regret but I can't dwell on that I have to make the future my priority. I was a functional alcoholic lol if there is such a thing doubt it!..I would plan my life around my next binge and when I mean binge I was on a mission to drink as much whiskey as I could always fearing I would not get enough so I would stock up with enough booze that I could throw one helluva party for normal people. crazy all that booze was for little ol me why I didn't die from alcohol poisoning I have no idea. the progression of this is so sneaky it ticks me off! I have declared war on alcohol.. if you ever need to vent I will be around:) Lord knows I have been venting loudly on SR since I made the commitment to myself to be sober it helps tremendously and so far no one here has told me to shut up :)

Posts like this remind me that I am powerless of alcohol.

OUCH! give yourself a little credit after all your mind is your most powerful weapon.

Thanks, but no "ouch!" needed. My mind got me into plenty of trouble and down a deep, dark hole.

Admitting I'm powerless over alcohol has set me free.

Welcome to SR!