day 2
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NY, NY
Posts: 64
day 2
hello all! ive been wanting to stop drinking for a few years now. gone to aa meetings in the past but never stuck with it and never could put together more than ten days sober. i have a lot of friends (old friends) who are active in aa and while that might seem like the best place to start, i feel like i need to do this on my own and get involved in a group/program that has nothing to do with my existing aa connections...does that make sense? im going to check out a meeting in my neighborhood this afternoon. for some background, i am 29, in a relationship with a wonderful guy who i hope to marry. we live together and while he is supportive of my getting sober (he's DONE dragging my drunk ass home from parties, etc.) drinking has been a big part of our activity in our time together (a year and a half). im a little nervous about how this is all going to work and ive asked him, for now, to please not drink in the house or in front of me. he is fine with that but he does like to drink and im a little worried about how this will be going forward. what the hell do we do in place of happy hour, meeting friends for drinks, etc.? argh. i know. one day at a time...
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Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 160
My partner also enjoys drinking and I have had to have that same conversation. my relationship was also based on drinking - I just drank alot more then he did. Luckily for me my boyfried (who only drank 2 cans of beer a night and was not an alcoholic) feels better for not drinking and has no desire to have one.
I am hoping that the longer we go without a drink the easier it will become to see other people drinking. I for one would struggle at the moment and will not put myself in that situation.
My mum came round yestarday and got drunk - I was only on day 3. I have not discussed my problem with my mum but felt so angry towards her. I told her on the phone last night that she is not allowed to come round my house when she is drinking. I cannot take the risk of picking up when I think how hard it was for me to achieve my first day.
Dont put yourself in a situation where you may be tempted to drink. Come on, we can do this.x
I am hoping that the longer we go without a drink the easier it will become to see other people drinking. I for one would struggle at the moment and will not put myself in that situation.
My mum came round yestarday and got drunk - I was only on day 3. I have not discussed my problem with my mum but felt so angry towards her. I told her on the phone last night that she is not allowed to come round my house when she is drinking. I cannot take the risk of picking up when I think how hard it was for me to achieve my first day.
Dont put yourself in a situation where you may be tempted to drink. Come on, we can do this.x
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: finding a home
Posts: 109
Hi Almay777, SolarEclipse,....
We are all on the same boat! I'm on day 4.....I just don't have the advise just yet to give you guys but hopefully one day I will. There's many people here on SR that can help us and care....and that's a fact....On the other hand I'm closed in my house not wanting to go out....I'm so afraid of going straight to the store once again and buying that bottle which has me prisoner......At home right now I feel safe.....I'm also having that morning graving....I don't know if it's because I'm on an empty stomach or what?...But there's a pattern...I really enjoy that morning high and that how I normally begin on a binge......I'm also hiding from everyone trying to focuse on SR & the Bible...I don't know if this is normal or what?..Yersterday I was glued to gods words.....that really helped my strength to say not today.....Begging him to allow me to find him and to lead me in the right direction....I have no idea anymore on what makes sense...But what I do know is that the minute I feel confident about my sobriety I fall again....thinking ....(I can drink just a couple)...And that doesn't take long...a week maybe.....I'm afraid! Tears......................... But we can do this!!!!!!!!!!
I once read that the beginning of the Drug and Alcoholic recoveries were isolated in a room with just a bible....for 30 days plus...and the outcome was good.....I'll find the article and maybe I can share it with you guys...............Take care
We are all on the same boat! I'm on day 4.....I just don't have the advise just yet to give you guys but hopefully one day I will. There's many people here on SR that can help us and care....and that's a fact....On the other hand I'm closed in my house not wanting to go out....I'm so afraid of going straight to the store once again and buying that bottle which has me prisoner......At home right now I feel safe.....I'm also having that morning graving....I don't know if it's because I'm on an empty stomach or what?...But there's a pattern...I really enjoy that morning high and that how I normally begin on a binge......I'm also hiding from everyone trying to focuse on SR & the Bible...I don't know if this is normal or what?..Yersterday I was glued to gods words.....that really helped my strength to say not today.....Begging him to allow me to find him and to lead me in the right direction....I have no idea anymore on what makes sense...But what I do know is that the minute I feel confident about my sobriety I fall again....thinking ....(I can drink just a couple)...And that doesn't take long...a week maybe.....I'm afraid! Tears......................... But we can do this!!!!!!!!!!
I once read that the beginning of the Drug and Alcoholic recoveries were isolated in a room with just a bible....for 30 days plus...and the outcome was good.....I'll find the article and maybe I can share it with you guys...............Take care
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Whistler, British Columbia
Posts: 222
Hey Solar
Congrats on day 2!!
My wife also drinks. But like Almay said, I to drank ALOT more than her so this was my problem not hers.
Its very easy the first few days to resent your BF for drinking and your brain is going to play tricks on you.
If your BF does support this then I see no problems in your future. But if he does not then be happy your not married with kids.
Congrats on day 2!!
My wife also drinks. But like Almay said, I to drank ALOT more than her so this was my problem not hers.
Its very easy the first few days to resent your BF for drinking and your brain is going to play tricks on you.
If your BF does support this then I see no problems in your future. But if he does not then be happy your not married with kids.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NY, NY
Posts: 64
shygirl… i have had the same problem of getting confident after a week and starting the process all over again. im scared of that too. im hoping to work harder and commit to a group this time. this is the first time ive posted here and so far im really happy with the support and reading other people's stories and just generally feeling less alone about my problem. are you going to meetings? i think that can make a difference in getting past the feeling confident/using again hurdle.
hey bcboy! yeah i dont want to resent my bf and im encouraging him to go out for drinks with friends. theres a nightly aa meeting around happy hour time right in my hood. that time of day is a trigger for me so i want to be sure im occupied somehow at the end of the workday. how long have you been sober?
hey bcboy! yeah i dont want to resent my bf and im encouraging him to go out for drinks with friends. theres a nightly aa meeting around happy hour time right in my hood. that time of day is a trigger for me so i want to be sure im occupied somehow at the end of the workday. how long have you been sober?
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
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Hi SolarEclipse,
It sounds like you're motivated to make this work!
I think that planning to avoid trigger times is really important. One of the things that helped me the most in the early days was to plan ahead and change my daily routines.
I hope you keep reading and posting.
It sounds like you're motivated to make this work!
I think that planning to avoid trigger times is really important. One of the things that helped me the most in the early days was to plan ahead and change my daily routines.
I hope you keep reading and posting.
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 587
I agree, you need to find a way to deal with live other then drinking and learn coping skills. Every time I leave work and go home, I pass the liquor stores and I just pulled in to drown my feelings telling me I dserve to relax. I am on day 11 today, but every day I go home I have the urge. As for your BF, if he really wants to be with you he will learn not to drink around you.
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NY, NY
Posts: 64
thanks sasa and anna.
i made it to a meeting today and liked it. i felt comfortable and like i "was in the right place." i dont think i can do this on my own so my plan is to "work the program". im not easy in social situations and didnt talk to anyone today but i think it was still a good start.
i made it to a meeting today and liked it. i felt comfortable and like i "was in the right place." i dont think i can do this on my own so my plan is to "work the program". im not easy in social situations and didnt talk to anyone today but i think it was still a good start.
i've done my almost
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
Originally Posted by solareclipse 
thanks sasa and anna.
i made it to a meeting today and liked it. i felt comfortable and like i "was in the right place." i dont think i can do this on my own so my plan is to "work the program". im not easy in social situations and didnt talk to anyone today but i think it was still a good start.
i made it to a meeting today and liked it. i felt comfortable and like i "was in the right place." i dont think i can do this on my own so my plan is to "work the program". im not easy in social situations and didnt talk to anyone today but i think it was still a good start.
It's been 6 months since my last drink. I'm on step 8 and an active member of AA. I think I've found a solution to my alcoholism.
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NY, NY
Posts: 64
congratulations kjell! it looks like aa is working for you. i hope to go again tomorrow...same time, same place and i might even make an effort to not slink out when its over. any advice on getting a sponsor?
i've done my almost
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
Originally Posted by solareclipse
congratulations kjell! it looks like aa is working for you. i hope to go again tomorrow...same time, same place and i might even make an effort to not slink out when its over. any advice on getting a sponsor?
After more time in the program, I switched to a permanent(sp?) sponsor and we've been working together ever since.
Keep us updated if you'd like.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NY, NY
Posts: 64
well day 2 is now day 4...went out to dinner last night with bf. i had asked when i decided i wanted to stop drinking that he doesnt drink in front of me but then as we were out last night i decided i really didnt care at all if he wanted a beer. so he had one and i had no feeling of either deprivation or resentment or temptation. so thats good!
tonight, im supposed to meet a friend tonight who i dont see often and the plan is "to get a drink" but im feeling confident that i can order a ginger ale. i might just say "im not drinking" without getting into it entirely. plan to go to another meeting today and maybe ask someone to be my temporary sponsor. im also a little nervous about the upcoming weekend. its a holiday and i will be away from saturday to monday...that means no meetings which i find to be a great support in these early days.
physically i feel good...so much more energy!
tonight, im supposed to meet a friend tonight who i dont see often and the plan is "to get a drink" but im feeling confident that i can order a ginger ale. i might just say "im not drinking" without getting into it entirely. plan to go to another meeting today and maybe ask someone to be my temporary sponsor. im also a little nervous about the upcoming weekend. its a holiday and i will be away from saturday to monday...that means no meetings which i find to be a great support in these early days.
physically i feel good...so much more energy!
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Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 160
Well Done Solareclipse - brilliant news. I am only on day 6 so we are pretty much in the same place. Try not to put too much temptation in your way too soon. I went to the pub yestarday and had a sparkling water. Although I didnt crave a drink I did feel weird. I am going to try to not place myself in too many of these situations at the moment.
Everyone on this site worked so hard just to get day 1 - day 4 is great!
Everyone on this site worked so hard just to get day 1 - day 4 is great!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NY, NY
Posts: 64
Just wanted to update this old post. It's Day 28 now! Thank you for staying strong and keeping me inspired every single day. I feel good, I look healthy and I know this is the right decision.
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