coming_clean

I think my girlfriend and I are over....we both have the think now for a couple of days....i´ve been ginving and giving and giving. She has mostly been taking, at least how I see this. It started even before I was detoxing, but now the worst is over, i´m having so much doubt. I have met some other girl online, been speaking with her online, and I started to have some feelings for her. I was totally in shock about this, so I called up my girlfriend, telling her I want to work this out with HER, not with some other online bimbo. But i´ve just been lacking some emotional attention....what is it with these early twenty year old girls, so bloody egocentric. All they want to do is party and not care about anything. Sorry for generalizing. I´m only 26, and maybe because of my struggles with addiction and other stuff in my life i feel too mature for her. I don´t want a girl that´s only interested in drinking, lying at the beach, spending money she doesn´t have,

Anyways it doesn´t matter right now...I still hope we´re gonna make it through this somehow, but it´s her call now, she needs to take me more as I am, and get some goals in life of her own instead of leaching of me.

I´m not gonna use, altough the thought arised about twice this evening...I know this will only bring death and destruction...cunning ******* this addiction...

I´m facing this sober, and altough sometimes my hart is racing like a rocket, and I sometimes feel depressed, it´s better then not feeling anything at all.

time will tell, one day at a time....and what a day it has been...

Anna

What I know is that early recovery is a time for big changes, and that can include your close relationships.

Time will tell if things work out with you and your girlfriend or not, but in the meantime stay focused on your recovery.

Dee74

I know that I wanted to make grand sweeping changes in my early recovery too, J, and people didn't half annoy me either....

Personally I'm glad I followed advice here, and cooled my heels.

You may find that this is a storm in a teacup - but at any rate as Anna says - stay focused on the sobriety, mate....everything else should follow that priority.

D

sleepie

I like your signature, coming clean A word of caution about online "relationships": Do not engage while in the fragile state of recovery. I know it's lonely- but one is just too open to the wrong kind of people at that stage. I went through something awful with 2 very manipulative, deceitful people I met online while struggling with my drinking (I still struggle)- just focus on your health- mind and body. Take care.

Change4life

day 9! awesome!!! Not a time to worry about your "girlfriend". sounds like you might need to move on. as far as online relationships in early stages of recovery...IMO not a good idea. listen to Anna and focus, focus, focus.

sleepie

Try going to meetings, just to reach out, meet some people- and then call them when you're feeling low! I met a few people at AA and I don't have to buy into the whole program if I don't want to. I do have a sponsor and she and I meet up sometimes and just hang out, she does not push anything on me and it helps abate the loneliness. We do happen to go to the same meeting every week (My "home" group").

coming_clean

I broke off the online crap....called for like five hours with my gf. it´s better now...

mmy recovery is and stays number one...