LookingForMe

Okay...so in my usual kidding way, is this all there is? I mean sobriety is awesome for a ton of reasons, don’t get me wrong but seriously, is this all there is?

How does one relax? How does one numb their mind to the jillion things bouncing around in it when it's 11:30 pm and you've "busied" yourself into exhaustion and/or boredom?

I've been exercising a ton, which is great and it does help but I feel like I climbed a mountain only to be rewarded with a penchant for anything with a ton of sugar in it! LOL

Ahh I guess it's all part of the process…I am a newbie (day 6). I realize I have to reprogram my brain, my life, my everything but I'm not giving up hope that an epiphany will soon hit and I'll say, "OOOOOOOOOOO I get it now!"

But until that time hits, how do you do it? How do you kick back at the end of a long day & unwind?

You’ve all held me up this far; I know you’ll give me great support & insight…thanks!!!

Kmber2010

Congrats on taking the plunge and I unwind knowing that I am not killing myself slowly and hurting others around me. Making excuses and banging my head against the wall for the things I have said and done and praying that I make it to the liquor store before my booze runs out.

It takes some time but for me my epiphany was just being sober. I am now off the sauce two months and I am blessed.

Hang in there my friend. There is no magic genie that will grant you wishes but compare each day and each minute to how it was when you were drunk. Yeah, for me I am breathing in deeper then ever in my sobriety.

Keep it going and start doing new activities and take all that booze money and treat yourself.

All the best!

Anna

I had insomnia and a racing mind long before I began to drink. Both got worse when I was drinking, and now in recovery, I still have to deal with both. I find that meditation helps. Granted it is hard to stick to it, but it does help to 'teach' your mind to relax.

blue2

I truly understand what you mean. I constantly asked myself this through my first attempt at sobriety and came up with no answer only to end up relapsing after six weeks. "Normal" life is banal/mundane, full of anxiety and irritations. Which if your anything like me was cured temporarily by using mind altering substances to dull the feelings.
However I do believe that your negativity will reduce as each day goes by, at day 6 you may still be suffering physical withdrawal, the mental situation may take a while longer to abate but it certainly will.
From then each day of sobriety will deliver more gifts than you could think possible. The ability to unwind by doing banal things like reading a book, watching TV, talking to friend will then seem commonplace.
We took ourselves down a long path searching happiness but it only delivered sadness, it's a long way back but must surely be worthwhile.

AWOL

Hi LookingatMe
Thank you for posting. Drinking is part of the "comfort" zone. As humans we become habituated to it. Daily life, like drinking, is habitual. I had a very similar mindset when I stopped drinking. What the heck do I do when the sun goes down? When the fire lights up? When the boys crack a beer? When my friend has a glass of wine? How the heck am I going to be able to drink coke at my best friend's wedding? Watch the World Cup drinking ginger beer? How I am I going to fill this no-alcohol void alone? There were two strategies that helped a lot: The first was recognizing that drinking, like so many other aspects of our daily lives, is a deeply entrenched habit; the second strategy was to replace this habit with some other activity "just for today." Believe me, "just for today I will not drink" really works. If you do something positive instead, like helping someone else, it will help you immeasurably to stop drinking because you will be transforming your drinking habit into a positive result. Don't think about how you are going to be able to spend the rest of your life without alcohol. Stay with the present, because that's all you have and don't drink, just for today. And if you really want to relax, try meditation.

FBL

I figure it took me nearly 30 years to get where I was (12-18 beers per day, every day), it sure as hell wasn't gonna get fixed in a few days, weeks, months! Hang in there, it DOES get better

mftrader

You asked my next question for me. I will continue to read this thread in search of support. Thanks. Looks like we are in the same boat.

Kjell

Day 6 for me entailed going to work and then either going to an AA meeting or going to outpatient therapy. I did this for 4 months before I slowed down to a few meetings a week. I didn't have time to kick back, unwind, and try to overthink things.

I'm now close to 180 days (on step 8 in AA) and the brain fuzz is just now, just sort of...starting to lift.

I'm hoping I'm building a good foundation.

augustwest

As far as calming my mind, meditation is the best thing for that. I do it every day. Twice a day on many days, morning and night.

The restlessness you're experiencing only went away for me with time. For the first 60 days or so i had to keep busy and wasn't comfortable just relaxing at the end of the day. Meditation helped a lot, but time was the biggest help. I can totally relax now.

As far as this being it, yep, this is it. It's just life. It has it's ups and downs and emotions that come and go. The joy for me now is in this impermanence. Being ably to fully experience the range of what life has to offer. It's not always easy and sometimes it's better than i ever imagined.

Buckle your seatbelt cuz you're in for a hell of a ride.

augustwest

Also, the biggest thing for me in early recovery was meetings, meetings, and meetings. Every day, sometimes twice a day. And getting a sponsor and starting on my step work. And exercise and good nutrition and lots and lots of laughter. This holds true still, but with slightly less meetings. Like only 7 a week. hahaha

hendershot

Sobriety never = the chemical-induced euphoria you have become accustomed to.

I struggled early on when I thought happiness in the program would be analagous to how I felt when I was drunk or high. It isn't. It is better, but not the same thing.

At 6 days you are in your sober infancy, which is exactly where you need to be. Keep going and you will find a new kind of peace, but it takes time.

Rusty Zipper

LFM an emotional rearangement,

however one finds it,

good wishes on slowing down The Band of Gypsy's LFM

least

This is so true for me also. I was looking for a 'sober buzz' and it ain't like that. Hang in there. Six days is just the beginning. It does get better.

Fandy

I knew that booze was taking it's toll on my body and it showed....if you drink regularly for an extended time, you begin to look like you are 10 years older than you are....you are swollen, puffy and red in the face...you are SOB and have elevated cholesterol and HTN...you have palpitations, anxiety and generally feel tired all the time, until the next drink or 2-3-4-5 "perks you up"....then you can begin the whole cycle the next day again.

so maybe you haven't seen the extended effect of drinking yet and hopefully you won't get to my point.....there is a lot that can happen so you can feel that "all there is" is really something to celebrate.

I try to find something enjoyable to concentrate on to relax...usually reading works.

Brucel

I'm guessing, but I think that you detoxed for the same reason I did. My life before was unbearable. Booze and dope didn't work anymore and I was willing to try anything. My life has changed so much and so will yours if you stick with it. Keep it up and great things will come to pass. God Bless

Mark75

Least - sober buzz!! LOL ... Scary thing is, I know what you mean. But, it is possible... Exercise... Meditation... Reading... Sometimes just white knuckling it. But my goal in sobriety is more than just white knuckling it. But, we all have tough days... My trick is to go into a dark space, lie down and put on my headphones and listen to music. Really tough day... I put on my meditation music, liquid mind. Sometimes I fall into sleep, and when I wake up after about 30 min, the anxiety is passed.

Of course AA helps... If I call someone, it is amazing how well talking to another really helps... But I gotta make that call...

It gets a lot better. But take a personal journey and really recover....