Stacey999

Thanks everyone!

Yup, deep down I know Homeland Security probably wouldnt give a hoo-hah, Im just concerned about it being in my notes, I guess its shame. Apart from this forum, Ive never expressed to anyone, my drinking problem. Ive always laughed it off in public as its the norm in the bar scene...Shots!!!!!!!
Everyone in the bar is an alcoholic, same people everyday drinking and drinking so its easy to start thinking we are all normal.
I just got home, its 2am and I didnt drink. It was a slow shift and my colleagues were doing shots and sipping on cocktails to pass the time. I drank 4 cups of coffee and 2 sweet teas, lol which has me now totally wired but over the moon that I managed a shift without drinking alcohol.
It feels real weird to be sober at this time in the morning, totally foreign but I like it.
Apart from headaches, excessive tiredness, slight irritability, I havent had any major withdrawls, which of course has my beasty telling me that it means Im not a proper alcoholic, I just need to keep my drinking in check.
Fortunatley, I can smell the bs from here, I just hope and pray that I stay on guard from such nonsense.

To Snarf, its awesome to hear of a fellow bar worker in recovery, its such a tough business and I often wonder whether Id be in this trouble if I worked at Target, probably, Im sure I would have found another reason to drink.
Thanks for the offer of a headsup about local meetings, I shall look into them.

To Sobermax....Saturday,,,ENGLAND!!!!!!, Im a minority in my town, if we lose, Ill NEVER live it down.

Thankyou for all the support, Im off to bed, hopefully to have another bizarre dream featuring Glenn Danzig and a cucumber or if not, to lie awake and pat myself on the back whilst hubby snores next door completley unaware of my mini victory.

xxxx

Dee74

I think nothing is more important than our well being, Stacey.

There should be no shame whatsoever in going to seek professional help for a disease, condition, addiction - call it what you will...

As I see it, it's simply not a weakness or a moral lapse.

D

Snarf

Great job making it through your shift without a drink, Stacey! I know what you mean about seeing the same cast of characters at the bar every day. I've been at the same bar for 2 years, and only in my recovery have a really noticed how much and how often some of our regulars drink. Now that I'm not drinking, I worry about a lot of them. It's just not normal to sit at the same bar 5-7 days a week and drop a couple hundred bucks on booze. I also feel sad for a lot of the people. I've found ways to keep myself busy without drinking, doing positive, fun things that I didn't do when I was drinking. I feel sad when I see the same folks sitting at the same bar night after night. I want them to do something else. Go see a movie, catch a Braves game, head downtown to the High Museum...ANYTHING! Anything but sitting there drinking the night away, and doing the same thing again the next day.

And it's easy to get caught up in the drinking lifestyle when you're surrounded by it. In the restaurant/bar biz, most of your customers are drinking, and most of the staff drinks heavily as well (this has been my experience). You get off late, you want to unwind, you have a drink or 2 at work, then you head somewhere else and have 5 or 10, then stop by the store on the way home for more booze...It's a rough lifestyle. I didn't think I'd be able to handle not drinking while working in this industry, but I've done well so far.

You can do this. Life will be so much better for you and for your daughter. There's lots of evidence to show that to be true.

flutter

Welcome! We have a bit in common, I'm 35 and an ex vodka drinker, and most importantly, a mommy.. I didn't drink vodka til 'towards the end', but it really spiralled my life out of control. Glad you're putting a stop to it now, there's such a better life to be had!

I hope you get some support, if you aren't getting any at home.. there's several folks here who have lived a sober journey amidst being with a partner who drinks, or in a job where it's common. I can't imagine how difficult that is for you, but I'm so glad you're here..