SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

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-   -   June 2010 Sobriety Group (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/202412-june-2010-sobriety-group.html)

livefierce 06-22-2010 11:03 AM

Sorry to hear that you're feeling down today, Super71. Is there anything specific that's running through your mind that you're comfortable sharing? Or is it just general malaise?

littlechicklet 06-22-2010 12:59 PM

Hey everyone. Day one again. I feel really ashamed, did some stupid stuff last night that I have to confess to my husband this evening. Not really looking forward to that.

I've been thinking today about how I NEED to change. I really can't control my drinking. So, obviously this solo white knuckle quitting isn't working. What do I need to do to find accountability? Go to a meeting? See a councilor? Tell my husband? Probably all three of these things. I'll start tonight by really talking to my husband about my alcoholism. I can see a councilor for free at school which is really nice. AA seems really scary and I'm nervous to just go alone.

I can't live like this anymore. I feel horrible about everything.

BreakFree 06-22-2010 01:54 PM

Hello Everyone :)

(((Traderjane)))

I'm feeling really tired today and my eyes are bothering me from all of the allergens in the air. All of which used to be a trigger for me. Really unproductive, I know! Anyway...I don't have much to share, but wanted to pop in to say HELLO and see how everyone was doing today.

This afternoon I was part of a conversation that involved having drinks. For a moment it sounded like a really great idea, but then I remembered that I'm not drinking alcohol AT ALL anymore. I reminded myself of how bad I feel already and how much worse alcohol would make me feel. I have come to realize that it's more difficult accepting the fact that alcohol is no longer the release it used to be (or that I thought it was), than it is to say NO.

The computer screen is bothering my "allergy eyes" so I'd better close here.

Have a great evening everyone :)

OZboy 06-22-2010 03:35 PM

:welcome...all..:newbe:s...lol..

..I got 2 weeks to-day :dance4: Ozy..

traderjane 06-22-2010 03:49 PM

Hi everyone and Breakfree --- I had a day exactly as you described. No allergies for me, but kind of an unproductive day, which I truly hate.

Also like you, Breakfree, I have had a little sadness about the realization that alcohol isn't what it used to be for me. There was a time when it was something I could look forward to -- a release of tension, just as you described. A fun activity with friends, etc. Now I truly know there is no such thing as that for me. I can't drink normally and moderately. The party is over.

There were other reasons for me to stop (the list is too numerous) but I was having lower abdominal pain on the days after I drank. After I stop drinking for a few days, the pain magically disappears. I'm on Day 2 today and the pain is gone. My body is thanking me for not poisoning it anymore.

I hope you are all doing well. Even though I did not have the best of days, it was and is a sober day and it will be great waking up tomorrow with no hangover.

I guess it did not help that is was hot as h*ll here today and every activity was a real chore!!! Enough complaining :) Later all.

Dee74 06-22-2010 03:59 PM

Congrats Oz :)

D

anono 06-22-2010 04:12 PM

hey good to see you all here :) .... well done laura on starting this thread... you go girl!!!

traderjane 06-22-2010 06:28 PM

Congrats OZboy! And hiya Kate!!!

I'm a little more cheery now. Got out of that little afternoon funk.

I was thinking about the second to last time I drank and how I still felt drunk in the morning. What an awful feeling. I only wanted it to go away and to feel normal again. Feeling sober is a good feeling and I'm going to enjoy it tonight :)

Going to watch "Design Star" now with my daughter... night all!

mayorob1 06-22-2010 07:14 PM

Day two, worried about the weekend
 
Hi everyone,

I am back on my second day, didn't feel like drinking today but I am concerned About the weekend, we go away on the weekends, small cottages are close together & lots of neighbors gather to talk, joke and drink. I will have to do lots of walks, keep busy, no doubt my wife can find me a million jobs Around the place.

Anyone have pointers,

Regards,

Rob

super71 06-22-2010 07:25 PM

Livefierce,

Thanks for the message.. just feeling overwhelmed I guess by not being able to drown my feelings in alcohol.. Made it through the day though and that is good. Not sure if AA is for me, but am committing to going to a meeting Thursday. I hope you are doing well!

mayorob1 06-22-2010 07:27 PM

Still drunk in the morning
 

Originally Posted by traderjane (Post 2633202)
Congrats OZboy! And hiya Kate!!!

I'm a little more cheery now. Got out of that little afternoon funk.

I was thinking about the second to last time I drank and how I still felt drunk in the morning. What an awful feeling. I only wanted it to go away and to feel normal again. Feeling sober is a good feeling and I'm going to enjoy it tonight :)

Going to watch "Design Star" now with my daughter... night all!

So many days in my life have been wasted because of exactly that, for me I still feel drunk, hung over & have no motivation the day after. As the guy from the animal house movie said to John Belushi (drunk, fat & stupid is no way to go through life son). By remaining sober i will hopefully kill three birds with one stone.



Thanks for listening, all stay strong we are worth it!!!

Robi

traderjane 06-22-2010 08:06 PM

OMG Rob, that is the cutest dog I've ever seen... and he looks just like my dog!! :)

RE: the weekend, try to enjoy the feeling of being sober and think about how much crappier you will feel in the morning if you give into temptation. And keeping busy is always a good plan. Exercise, long walks, snacks and soft drinks....those all help me.

I know I will be sober this weekend because my parents are coming to stay with me - for 3 nights. They know of my drinking issues *somewhat* and so I would never drink in front of them. Aside from all that, I made a pledge to myself to stop drinking, which is really more important!

KC1 06-22-2010 08:33 PM

KC here. I have to admit - I have been trying to "moderate" lately. I've been successful sometimes, not so good other times, but the good times outweigh the bad. I am not afraid to admit that here. We are all struggling. I don't know how I will end up. We are here for support. Some of us are going to fall down. We pick ourselves up and dust ourselves off and start again. Let's not forget what this board is about. It's about SUPPORT. It's not about criticism if we fall off the wagon. It's not about lecturing and trying to get people to go to AA. It's about helping each other. We are all different and have different ways of trying to quit. Let's support one another in whatever manor we need support. I hate to see people leave the board because they feel they don't belong. Enough of my "soap box" for this evening. Everyone should feel welcome here. And that, is my very opinionated opinion.!

Dee74 06-22-2010 08:40 PM

Let's please not get out the soapboxes LOL :headbange

KC, what makes you think this time will be any different from all the other times?

Just interested.

D

mayorob1 06-22-2010 09:09 PM

My she-poo is a cuteee
 

Originally Posted by traderjane (Post 2633294)
OMG Rob, that is the cutest dog I've ever seen... and he looks just like my dog!! :)

RE: the weekend, try to enjoy the feeling of being sober and think about how much crappier you will feel in the morning if you give into temptation. And keeping busy is always a good plan. Exercise, long walks, snacks and soft drinks....those all help me.

I know I will be sober this weekend because my parents are coming to stay with me - for 3 nights. They know of my drinking issues *somewhat* and so I would never drink in front of them. Aside from all that, I made a pledge to myself to stop drinking, which is really more important!

Hi Traderjane,

She is almost three now, I will have to upload a new picture but she is still a cutie,

Thanks for the thoughts, I think mostly the hangover is a pain (no pun intended) but emotionally is where I feel the worst, when drinking has caused me so much pain over my life time. The next day my mind wonders how many people I upset while the drunk month is charge or what I might of did that will never be able to be reversed or forgiven,

Time for bed, stay strong.
Thanks Rob

BreakFree 06-23-2010 05:15 AM

Good Morning :)

You know...life is stressful. I know...tell me something you don't already know! ;)

Anyway...in thinking about life's stresses, which I am feeling right now, I came up with this idea. Everytime I feel like drinking, I am going to journal about it. The time, place, circumstance. The next day, I'm going to go back and read it and then I'm going to record what actually happened after that/for the rest of the day and what WOULD have happened if I drank. I know having access to a journal AT THAT MOMENT might not always be possible, but I'm going to try. Should make an interesting/enlightening reading!

Well, I'm off to get another cup of coffee :)

traderjane 06-23-2010 05:32 AM

Good morning! I like your journaling idea, Breakfree. While on my yoga retreat, I took a journal with me and recording all the ideas I had -- very therapeutic!

Rob, I have a two year old cockapoo who looks a LOT like your 3 year old shi-poo. So adorable!!! I'll try to get a picture of him on here soon.

I spent a lot of time reading on SR last night -- different other threads in all sorts of forums. It occurred to me that this time quitting is more of a relief than a feeling of "it's going to be hard." What a relief to be done trying to moderate, trying to squeeze alcohol in my life where there is no room for it, and as Rob described, the emotional toll of drinking. I know that all too well. It's so time to let go of this addiction that has had a hold of me for a few years now.

Happy Wednesday :) Time for coffee.

super71 06-23-2010 08:18 AM

Day 5 - feeling good. :) Thought I was on day 6 - must be that "brain fog"..

littlechicklet 06-23-2010 08:33 AM

I made it through day one, yesterday, which was one of the worst days I've had in a long time! I talked to my husband for the first time about my issues and he just WOULD not accept it. He has no problem with drinking so he can't imagine how once I start I just can't stop until I'm passed out. We talked for a few hours and while he still won't accept an 'alcoholic' label, he has agreed to help hold me accountable and is ok with me going to AA meetings if I want to. So, there's progress anyway.

traderjane 06-23-2010 09:53 AM

Hey there Super71 and LittleChicklet! Glad you are both doing well. LC, isn't it amazing that we have to convince someone else that we have a problem? I can see telling my friends I'm quitting drinking and having them say, "Why? You're not an alcoholic!" The thing is, we all know ourselves better than others know us. And only we know the personal hell that we have been through.

I just had an OMG moment.

My new sobriety date is 6.21.10, which I hope is my last, and it is also the date of Summer Solstice. It was the date I went out to the woods and threw away my last bottle of wine. So today I ordered a charm for my necklace with that date on it to remind me of my decision and promise to myself on that day.

I then remembered that I had joined SR last June under a different name (something like Hopeful999). I went through some crazy stuff, canceled my account and rejoined under a new name (traderjane) in July. So I went back to the Hopeful999 account and looked at the join date -- it was June 21, 2009. Exactly one year ago I found SR.

I like to believe that these things mean something. Very cool.

super71 06-23-2010 12:28 PM

Disclaimer: I am a huge "airhead" in general, so I don't think this is just a side effect of my new sobriety brain fog.. but I AM on day SIX - not five. I just realized where my confusion lies... the date on my computer says 6/24/10.. but it is actually the 23rd..so on my quit date I assumed the computer was correct and thought I had quit on the 19th but had really quit on the 18th! So glad I figured this out - it was making me think I was truly going nuts! I feel much better now. Now, off to go figure out how to fix the date on my computer?!

Dee74 06-23-2010 01:24 PM

if you're running XP, just double click on the time down in the bottom right hand corner Super 71...that will bring up a calendar and you can click on your correct date.

D

super71 06-23-2010 02:12 PM

Got it! Thanks Dee :)

Grace2 06-23-2010 04:08 PM

It's 7 minutes past midnight here and I'm now moving into day 12! Whoo hoo, it's a good feeling. Long may it last/1 xxx

mayorob1 06-23-2010 04:15 PM

Only you can hold you accountable Littlechicklet
 

Originally Posted by littlechicklet (Post 2633619)
I made it through day one, yesterday, which was one of the worst days I've had in a long time! I talked to my husband for the first time about my issues and he just WOULD not accept it. He has no problem with drinking so he can't imagine how once I start I just can't stop until I'm passed out. We talked for a few hours and while he still won't accept an 'alcoholic' label, he has agreed to help hold me accountable and is ok with me going to AA meetings if I want to. So, there's progress anyway.

If you pass out from drinking you are an alcoholic (unless it only happened
Once in high school). Even if your husband won't let you label yourself an alcoholic hopefully he will understand you need distance from alcohol especially
In early sobriety. But for me & I hope you we are staying sober because our DNA won't allow us to control alcohol. It controls us!!!

Stay sober for you and the rest will happily fall into place

Stay strong,

Rob:c011:

mayorob1 06-23-2010 04:19 PM

Day 12 Congradulations Grace2
 

Originally Posted by Grace2 (Post 2633990)
It's 7 minutes past midnight here and I'm now moving into day 12! Whoo hoo, it's a good feeling. Long may it last/1 xxx

Way to go'
:c011:

BreakFree 06-24-2010 04:26 AM

Good Morning :)

Just wanted to wish everyone a great day!

traderjane 06-24-2010 06:09 AM

Good morning!!

I am doing well -- was going to go for a run but it's already too hot and humid outside at 8:00 am! Well, there's always the evening.

So yesterday I decided to book a hotel for a weekend for me and my daughter. She graduated 5th grade and wanted a weekend alone with me to shop, see a movie, eat out, get manicures and pedicures, etc. She's my only girl and I spoil her rotten :)

So I went online and looked at a couple of nice hotels and looked at the photos. I was amazed at how much alcohol was made to be part of the hotel experience in the photos. A couple of them had wine cellars and nightly wine tastings for their guests. A few had complimentary happy hours. In nearly all of the photos, alcohol was prominently featured. One picture had two happy career type women sitting at the bar laughing with martinis in their hands. Another picture was of shopping bags thrown on a chair in a hotel room with a nice full glass of red wine on the table next to the chair, suggesting you could shop all day long and then come back and enjoy a glass of wine in your hotel room. For someone trying to give up drinking, it was quite obvious what is going on. Many industries use alcohol, specifically good wines, to suggest the "good life."

Given this, I'm not surprised I have returned to wine drinking so many times. It's so prevelant in our adult lives. But they don't show the other side of the story, do they.

Well, I just decided to book the trip and forget all the references to wine and make it my own trip with my daughter. I'm now a sober person and better off. But what a powerful lie those pictures tell.

Have a great Thursday!

super71 06-24-2010 07:37 AM

One week today!
 
Very proud of this, and hoping I truly work up the strength to attend the AA meeting tomorrow. Hope everyone is doing well - we can do this!

bdiddy5522 06-24-2010 07:55 AM

TJ- Sounds like a fun weekend. Good for you. Yes, alcohol is glamorized all around us. But we know the truth, and what it does to US. Alcohol is just one of those things that we can't have. Oh well. Life can be even MORE fulfilling without it. The keys is remembering where that first drink leads us..... straight to a living hell! Enjoy your weekend with your daughter. :)


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