Giving it another go.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Florida
Posts: 83
Good morning all, It's a nice one here in fl. sun's a shining, and I'm enjoying some nice hot coffee, and a clear mind. I've prayed again this morning, as I try to do every morning, for god to take the compulsion to drink away from me. And to thank him for keeping me sober the past 14 days. I forget to do it, it's easy, I'm not in the habit, but when I remember, I just stop what I'm doing bow my head and say my prayer.
I was particularly moved this morning by a number of posts I've seen in this forum, from Grace2, Severian, and Spikeman, about your "slips". I know you guys are trying hard to make this work for you, and I pray for you that it works, I know I couldn't do it without the help of AA. I've had a few days already, that I would have drank (Guaranteed 100%) if I didn't have an AA meeting to goto in a few hours.
AA for me doesn't teach me how to stay sober, I do that on my own day by day, by not picking up a drink. What AA teaches you is how to live your life day by day without alcohol. I hope some of you can make it to a meeting for the first time, if you are struggling.
Yesterday, I hung out with an old drinking buddy of mine, and he was insistent on getting plastered for the day. I was a little nervous about it, but figured that, I like the guy, I'm going to have to see him get drunk sooner or later. We went out to a steakhouse and he started with some long island iced teas, to be followed by several rum and cokes at his house, and then some beers when we went out for a cigar later, and finally some Malted beverage and more beer for the late evening. He was pretty well lubricated by that point, and kept apologizing for his behavior.
I on the other hand was fine with it, I had more fun with him sober than I did when I was drinking. Though HAD I been drinking, I would have been worried that he thought I drank too much! LOL, isn't that the mind of an alcoholic. Whenever I drank with him, I felt the need to hide the fact that I needed more and more alcohol to get a higher buzz. I couldn't stop. Whenever we finished drinking together, I would always go back and hit the bottle alone some more.
This disease is so insidious, and slippery. It's a *******, and I feel for all of us who suffer from it. But we don't have to be it's victims, we CAN fight back against it, and sticking together will make us stronger to do so!
I'm off to a meeting, I love all you guys, thanks for being here for me
-Lith
Day 14
I was particularly moved this morning by a number of posts I've seen in this forum, from Grace2, Severian, and Spikeman, about your "slips". I know you guys are trying hard to make this work for you, and I pray for you that it works, I know I couldn't do it without the help of AA. I've had a few days already, that I would have drank (Guaranteed 100%) if I didn't have an AA meeting to goto in a few hours.
AA for me doesn't teach me how to stay sober, I do that on my own day by day, by not picking up a drink. What AA teaches you is how to live your life day by day without alcohol. I hope some of you can make it to a meeting for the first time, if you are struggling.
Yesterday, I hung out with an old drinking buddy of mine, and he was insistent on getting plastered for the day. I was a little nervous about it, but figured that, I like the guy, I'm going to have to see him get drunk sooner or later. We went out to a steakhouse and he started with some long island iced teas, to be followed by several rum and cokes at his house, and then some beers when we went out for a cigar later, and finally some Malted beverage and more beer for the late evening. He was pretty well lubricated by that point, and kept apologizing for his behavior.
I on the other hand was fine with it, I had more fun with him sober than I did when I was drinking. Though HAD I been drinking, I would have been worried that he thought I drank too much! LOL, isn't that the mind of an alcoholic. Whenever I drank with him, I felt the need to hide the fact that I needed more and more alcohol to get a higher buzz. I couldn't stop. Whenever we finished drinking together, I would always go back and hit the bottle alone some more.
This disease is so insidious, and slippery. It's a *******, and I feel for all of us who suffer from it. But we don't have to be it's victims, we CAN fight back against it, and sticking together will make us stronger to do so!
I'm off to a meeting, I love all you guys, thanks for being here for me
-Lith
Day 14
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Florida
Posts: 83
Hey again, Just checking in, I was listening to one of my AA tapes in the car yesterday and I liked what it had to say about drink craving. It talked about thoughts being "trains" that came into the station, and you don't have to get on every train that comes in. Obviously those us in early sobriety have a much bigger battle to fight with cravings. It is the insanity of the drink that still has us, and we have to fight hard against it. I had a terrible craving 2 nights ago, and had to call my sponsor, and pop into SR chat just to talk about it.
I believe that there is light at the end of the tunnel though. Those in AA with years of sobriety, have serenity and peace, they worked hard for it, but they DID obtain it. My journey continues, but it's great to be here.
-Lith
Day 16
I believe that there is light at the end of the tunnel though. Those in AA with years of sobriety, have serenity and peace, they worked hard for it, but they DID obtain it. My journey continues, but it's great to be here.
-Lith
Day 16
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