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God heaven help me :(

Old 05-26-2010, 10:35 AM
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God heaven help me :(

dunno what to say i drink too much...
i feel... like nothing, empty, not good enough.. worthless.

i need help, i did go to my doctor but he gave me a leaflet and told me to out the money id spend on booze in a pot and buy myself something at the end of the week, well!!!! im sure im not alone laughing at that!!

all good intentions, then something will happen OR NOTHING WILL HAPPEN! and u get that feeling....... i need a drink!

im not even quite 26, i just wanna be normal! i have 2 kids im so ashamed! they are well taken care of its the evenings...

my mums an alcoholic, drank since i was 2, i dont want my kids having MY memories! i lost my partner, im skint! and im a mess!

not sure what made me join this 2night but i really wanna get better and i dont know where to go
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Old 05-26-2010, 10:42 AM
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Hello there!

Your post made me laugh about the put the coins in the bottle...my poor old Nan used to say go for a walk hehe Have a bath is another one i was told , frig me i wouldve been having 30 baths a day and hundreds if i counted the thoughts about drinking before actually caving in and doing it!!!!!

Stick around and read some more and keep posting. By my signature line below its pretty obvious what i did and do to enjoy sobriety...takes some work and willingness but you can recover:-)
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Old 05-26-2010, 10:48 AM
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Welcome and yes u can
have a normal life if u
want it.

There is lots of good
suggestions here in SR
that will be passed on
to u as u continue to
read here.

I listened and absorbed
all i could and followed
the many before me
that thought their life
was over.

The allowed to let others
help them till they were
strong enough to help
themselves.

There will be suggestions
of clearing anything and
everything associated
with alcohol and drugs
out of ur home.

It will take a little time
to go thru the withdrawals
and get that poison out
of ur system.

In time as u get into a
recovery program u will
take steps one at a time
and a day at a time to get
u on the right path
to livingy happy joyous
and free from alcohol and
drugs.
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Old 05-26-2010, 11:13 AM
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Welcome Amy,
most of us have been and some still are feeling the way you do. Keep reading and posting to start with.
Number one: Find another Doctor - please.
Make a plan to stop, how, when and who (if anyone) will take care of your children.
It's not going to be easy, but it will be worth it - YOU are worth it.
Stick with us.
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Old 05-26-2010, 11:15 AM
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if i dont drink i cant sleep and sweat all night its horrible i dont feel better for it
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Old 05-26-2010, 11:22 AM
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Yeah i had that too on the nights that i didnt drink...would stay up till i couldnt stay awake anymore then fall asleep only to wake up abruptly in a state of panic...it was torture! Couldn't even relax, would just be constantly fidgetting to try and take my mind off of how i felt and the anxiety was overwhelming, like jumping if the phone rang then not picking up cos i couldnt talk to anyone i felt so bad...sucked!

People do go into detox, you might want to consider going to another doctor or someone specialising in addiction?
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Old 05-26-2010, 11:23 AM
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Hi Amy and welcome to SR:ghug3

You made the first important step, which is talking about your drinking problem and reaching out for help. I'm so sorry the doctor didn't take you seriously. You may want to look (in the yellow pages or call a local treatment center) for a doctor who specializes in addiction/detox.

Things will only get worse if you keep drinking, as many of us can attest to. This website has been a source of strength for me and as you continue to read/post, you find alot of people here who know exactly what you're going through.

Are you having withdrawal symptoms today?
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Old 05-26-2010, 11:27 AM
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no im ok but i cant sleep im up all night if i dont drink
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Old 05-26-2010, 11:29 AM
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It's normal and it takes a while. It could also be part of withdrawal. Everybody is different, which is why it would be so important to find a better doctor.
Once you are through it, it will get better, but........ only you can make that first step to get through it.
I'm sorry about your Mother, she is or was feeling just like you and the rest of us.
Do you have friends or other family member that can help?
Don't start thinking about the bad things when you stop drinking, start counting up the good things and what you would do if (when) you become sober. It is possible.
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Old 05-26-2010, 11:53 AM
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im so down
crying all the time, i really cant cope much longer
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Old 05-26-2010, 12:01 PM
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Originally Posted by AmyLost View Post
i really cant cope much longer
Yes you can! Hang on. It gets better. Is there somebody you can talk to in addition to us?
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Old 05-26-2010, 12:14 PM
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Welcome Amy, I too was in desperation and pain 86 days ago. Like everyone else has said, please see another doctor. A doctor usually will evaluate you and give you some withdrawal medication to ease the withdrawal symptoms. I didnt see a doctor but I wish I did because I experienced the horrible withdrawal symptoms for 3-8 days. The worst was that I couldnt sleep and I constantly kept getting night sweats. One of the worst nights was when I changed clothes 5 times in a span of 6 hours. I would sleep for an hour and wake up with chills and drenched with sweat. It was not fun. Plus, not being able to sleep and just sitting there waiting for time to go by was awful. All I did was just think about how miserable I was and what a screw up I was. It literally felt like each day lasted 48 hours.

I'm glad that you have come to the conclusion that this is not the way you want to or deserve to live your life. You are not alone. Everyone on this website is also dealing with these types of diseases. So it sounds like you need that extra push to start a plan.
1. Go see a doctor and tell him the truth about your drinking and how much you have been drinking. (this is very important) First, it lets your doctor know of your conditions and then he can properly treat you. Second, it will feel great to acknowledge to another person that you are suffering from this disease. On another note, there is patient/doctor confidentiality agreement so you can rest assure that he wont be saying anything. Plus, i'm sure he deals with it all the time.

2.While you are withdrawing from the alcohol, stay on this website and just read the stories and posts. This is what I did during my first week. It will help pass time and it will encourage you because others are in the same boat as you.

3. As you are feeling better, you should probably look into a recovery program. There are many out there and I think you can do a search on this website and it will give you many options. I am in the AA program and for me, it works, however, like I said, there are many out there.

4. Be proactive in whichever program you decide to go with and be proactive with the forum. People have told me that getting sober is easy but staying sober is the difficult part. For me, I have to stay proactive or I start to wander off and my alcoholic mind starts to take over. In my 86 days, it has happened many times already. Luckily, i'll catch myself before something bad happens.

5. By the way, add "do not drink" to each of these steps.
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Old 05-26-2010, 12:19 PM
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It sucks, I know. Just take it an hour/minute at a time. The emotions you're having are a part of the withdrawal period. The anxiety and depression will be so much better (if not gone) in another day or two, but if you keep drinking you'll just be repeating the scenario.

You really can get through this. There's nothing wrong with crying. Have some patient and compassion for yourself, drink some herbal tea (preferably the relaxing kind), take some good B vitamins, drink lots of water. And keep posting! Things really will get better.
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Old 05-26-2010, 12:31 PM
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i cant say to much to the doctor they will take my kids
i couldnt bare it
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Old 05-26-2010, 12:47 PM
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Who would take your kids, and why? Do you have some kind of court order already for drinking?

If you see a doctor, there is doctor/patient priviledge which means your visit remains confidential. They are sworn not to divulge anything you may say to them. Same for psychologists and psychiatrists.
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Old 05-26-2010, 01:07 PM
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Hi Amy,

I know how you are feeling right now.

There is help and support in AA. And people who have been through this will be able to help you work out how to approach things with the doctor. Are you in the UK or the US?

In my area there is a 24 hour AA helpline where anyone can speak to someone just to have someone to talk to if they are desperate and feeling alone.

You are not alone here.
Stay with us.
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Old 05-26-2010, 01:07 PM
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no i have nothing on my record

i didnt know that, my kids are happy and looked after, i dont want ss all over em!
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Old 05-26-2010, 01:21 PM
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WELCOME! We have VERY Similar stories, VERY! I am glad you are here, there is a lot of help to be found here.

I am currently opn day 3 of not drinking after my last embarassing antics to my husband this past weekend, but that is not why I chose to quit drinking, it was a long time coming and it was for me. I have been going to AA for 3 days, praying a lot, using this website a lot, taking all of the advice and assistance provided to everyone in AA and this board who i can tell knows what they are talking about b/c they are sober and thats what I want.
I have some substance issues I am dealing with as well but its the end of the road of all that for me and I feel relieved about that but I am just begginning to see all of the work there is to do, b/c I have tried many times at this before and was unsuccessful and now i am ready to do it the way everyone at AA and on this board got their SOBER TIME.
I wish you the very best, I can tell you peopl ehere are wondeful, you should read read read, dont be scared to post and figure out what you are going to do for yourself first, of course your familly and BREAK THAT CYCLE, thats whay I am doing for my embarassed husband, pooor 3 and 1/2 daughter, and simply for my LIFE and to find myself again b/c I have been mentally checked out for a long time from family, friends, everything but what I wanted to be doing and that way of life wasnt working and still isnt.
For me I am choosing AA, God and this website as my support b/c I have tried just about everything else and it hasnt worked, basically cutting corners, and doing it my way so I could still drink/use/and be in control, which had lead me to lose all control in my life.
The only people I have ever seen get sober and happy, which is an important component b/c I have seen people not drink/use but not untangle the messy lives they have created through their use of alcohol/drugs and they are not happy like those at NA/AA, so I am choosing to try it their way and doing EVERYTHING they suggest, again b/c for me, and I have been at this trying to get sober thing (not consistantly) but for practially my entire aduly life (at 33 and except for during my entire pregnancy thank God) and all of the ways I have previously tried have not worked, so I am going to try the proven methods.
Good luck, i hope you stick around.
<3 Dream
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Old 05-26-2010, 01:22 PM
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I understand; however if you sort your life out and begin treatment that is in favor of you, not against.
Please look up the helpline like others have suggested. They might be able to advise you what to do immediately.
Do it for your children Amy and try not to despair. You can get better, but you have to decide to.
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Old 05-26-2010, 01:25 PM
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amy,your in the uk right? i presume your a night drinker? how much are you drinking?
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