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Old 04-17-2010, 06:10 PM
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Last attempt

So, next Wednesday I'm going to make my last attempt at going sober (from alcohol) Please don't send me any funny faces or winking eyes, it really doesn't help me. However, I have had a lot of good advice from this site and would appreciate any genuine help that anyone has on giving up this nonsense for good. Before anyone asks, yes this date does have significance for me and might just make the difference. If I don't make any change it won't be the end of the world.
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Old 04-17-2010, 06:12 PM
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Originally Posted by Scarlet20 View Post
If I don't make any change it won't be the end of the world.
For me, it was going to be the end of the world if I didn't make a change. So, I had a lot of motivation.
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Old 04-17-2010, 06:21 PM
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Originally Posted by Scarlet20 View Post
So, next Wednesday I'm going to make my last attempt at going sober (from alcohol) Please don't send me any funny faces or winking eyes, it really doesn't help me. However, I have had a lot of good advice from this site and would appreciate any genuine help that anyone has on giving up this nonsense for good. Before anyone asks, yes this date does have significance for me and might just make the difference. If I don't make any change it won't be the end of the world.

No excuses- That's what helped me. It is a complete mindset for me. Alcohol has absoultely no place in my life any more. Once I fully and completely accepted that, I was able to make the change.

Good luck to you!
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Old 04-17-2010, 06:29 PM
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Hi Scarlet

What helped me was finally accepting what I was - an alcoholic...and realising every drink, sooner or later, led me back to the same dark place.

I also agree with Anna - change, I'm afraid, is mandatory - a failure to embrace change just might have been the end of the world for me too.

Support is vital too, so I hope we'll see you around.

Have you got any real life support in place, Scarlet?

good luck!
D
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Old 04-17-2010, 07:50 PM
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
What helped me was finally accepting what I was - an alcoholic...and realising every drink, sooner or later, led me back to the same dark place.
D
That's it right there. Same thing for me. Whenever I feel the urge to drink, I remember that I'm an alcoholic. As long as I'm honest with myself that that's exactly what I am, then I can't come up with any excuses to drink. I cut off every line of rationalization that might lead to it being okay.

Rev
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Old 04-17-2010, 08:27 PM
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Did something happen that made you decide
you are now an alcoholic?
I sure hope you did not have a bad health
report...or lose your job due to drinking.

My drinking turned me into a depressed woman
with no joy in my life.
Is that happening to you?

Please give us a bit more information
so we can offer more specific support.

Last edited by CarolD; 04-17-2010 at 08:54 PM.
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Old 04-17-2010, 09:39 PM
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I went to AA and got sober...it was either that or kill myself...quite remarkable how receptive one becomes when there is no more BS and you are really looking at the end!
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Old 04-18-2010, 02:51 AM
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Like others have said - acceptance of your condition. Until I became convinced I was alcoholic I was wasting my time. An older long-time sober friend used to say "you've got to let go of the corner of the bar-towel". And I was clinging on, although for a long time I did not realise it.

Then realising I could not do it myself and turning the problem over to my higher power was a massive weight off my existance - I am not a christian or anything BTW, but still believe in a power greater than little me.

I really wish you well and hope you get going and remember it's only one day at a time.

Stu
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Old 04-18-2010, 03:06 AM
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Finally accepting that alcohol is the problem, not the solution, and that other drugs were just a substitute for alcohol was the beginning of sobriety for me. Until then, I was sometimes not drunk but always wanting a drink.
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Old 04-18-2010, 03:25 AM
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I'm from Dublin too and the only advice I can give (I'm new on the recovery road) is to go to a meeting if you haven't already. It's a big lift when you realise that you're not such a freak, that this effects so many people. It's a very warm feeling when you walk into the room, hard to describe. But it's a feeling of belonging (well it was for me) and it'll help when times are tough and you're feeling like a drink.
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Old 04-18-2010, 04:00 AM
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whenever i put a condition on quiting for good, i failed,

i struck the day i wanted it more then life itself

good wishes scar
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Old 04-18-2010, 05:10 AM
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No smiley faces here, just a sincere hope that you can give it up for good.
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Old 04-18-2010, 08:30 AM
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Hi Scarlet, No smiley faces here either, I'm looking this morning a what you just said Scarlet, " I don't make any change it won't be the end of the world". You all most got it!! but for me it was the end of the world. It's CHANGE, I wish someone told me this 30 years ago. You don't have to go down that road i went..

The key is change, Start a program of recovery and AA is one option, but there are others, to get started you need a open mind. For me I was not able to solve this problem myself, I had to have some kind of recovery program!!!!.

Recovery is a lot of hard work but its so worth it Scarlet.. This is all the genuine help I can give you and I hope you find your path in sobriety..

Best Wishes.
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Old 04-18-2010, 09:18 AM
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hi
i just wanted to say i wish u luck but you seem to be talking urself in and out of quitting in the same breath
i'm going to make my last attempt at getting sober
and then
if i don't make any change, it won't be the end of the world
- putting anything/condition on this will set u up like i did me and i failed -significant date or no date.. i really hope u seek some more support perhaps with your doct - sorry if i have said anything to upset you but you are seeking truths
good luck and keep coming back
i support you getting there
Karma
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Old 04-18-2010, 04:49 PM
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I knew I had a drinking problem and I tried to hide it from myself and others. I was negative and depressed and that is what alcohol will do. I have not seen the horrors that some have faced and have not lost everything but it was part of the reason I got divorced. Also, lost friends, angered and hurt others with my words and actions, embarrassed myself above and beyond, lost respect from others and more importantly I lost my own self worth/respect in the process.

Drinking is my enemy and it was only when I hated what I had become under the influence that I got realized - I am worth more then this.

You deserve more if you realize you have a problem. I understand the idea of a significant date but drinking is a 100% commitment and to become sober.....it has to be the most important thing in your life because this journey is about you. Support is essential but I guess for me......if I pick up another drink it is the end of the world. That is how much it means to me.

I wish you well.

Kim
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Old 04-19-2010, 06:10 PM
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To CarolD

No nothing made me lose job/get depressed/bad health, thank God but your post sure does a lot of smiley faces! Thanks for the input though
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Old 04-19-2010, 06:24 PM
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For me, it was acceptance, and the basic fact that I was NOT the person I wanted to be. I don't want to be a woman who hides vodka bottles all over the house. I don't want to be worried about what I don't remember from the night before, and see that look on my husband's face when he realizes that I was functioning in a blackout once again.

I don't want to be the person who has to figure out how to hide booze when we take trips to see our kids.

I haven't been living. I've been hiding. No more. I want to live.

Come on Scarlet. Be one of the living.
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Old 04-19-2010, 08:37 PM
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I'm glad nothing drastic happened to you.
Thank you for replying to my concerns.

however....I won't be changeing my Avatar or Sig line
to suit your taste. ...
I will step away and let others assist you.

All my best
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Old 04-19-2010, 09:13 PM
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Scarlet, do you think this date you have selected HAS to be the last time? Is it just a way to call up the energy to make it more definitive when you articulate it that way? I imagined as much when I read your line about it not being the end of the world too - almost like you are using reverse psychology on yourself to prevent disappointment.

It might turn out to be a bit of shame to request not to have smiley faces in the replies, because that is likely to make people afraid to talk to you. Some people like them more than others, but in some cases the use of the smiley is a form of punctuation or accompanying body language. I know I have added a smiley before so that I can soften the tone and prevent someone from thinking I am particularly cranky. Unless you were getting at a request to have more depth to the responses written back to you as opposed to general well-wishing and cheerleading.

Choosing a date that holds special significance might have a power inside it for you. My date wasn't pre-selected and was not special to me, but it obviously has a significance to it now. (It was a week after Remembrance Day.) I'd never really given it a try before. I just grabbed on to a passing moment of common sense, and kept going. I don't know where to begin to explain how I do it every day, but you can click on my profile and look at my previous posts on the Stat tab to see if anything there does you any good. As it is, I am only operating on assumptions that I know what I am doing, but I've got to start somewhere, just like you do.
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Old 04-19-2010, 09:17 PM
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Everything you've decided about yourself is in play at this moment..

Only good wishes from me on your journey..Thx..Oz..
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