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How insidious this all is.

Old 04-11-2010, 03:18 PM
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How insidious this all is.

After 3 months fron october to January without a drink, I have had several occasions where I have had a glass or two of wine. And now these are more frequent lapses and I don't want to go back where I was. Howdo people re-commit themselves to abstinence? I feel so much better yet have romantic notions about wine. Am clearly trying to straddle a fence. The pressure to be remain straight is hard to deal with but then giving into even moderate drinking creates pressure too. Why can't I get comfortable with either lifestyle?
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Old 04-11-2010, 03:24 PM
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I know it's hard. At three months, there simply wasn't enough time to find out if you're comfortable with a sober lifestyle.

Start with simplier ideas perhaps? Tell yourself that in six months you can drink if you still want to. Then just try to keep repeating it every six months. ;-)
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Old 04-11-2010, 04:02 PM
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Am clearly trying to straddle a fence.
So was I. I finally had to get off the fence and decide what I wanted to do with my life and drinking just didn't fit in with what I wanted for myself. I didn't want to waste anymore time and money and was tired of always feeling sick when I drank. I don't know what exactly happened but I know that this time is for always. I haven't had a drink in over four months and am feeling better and more determined than ever.

I hope you can get off that fence and stay sober. Sobriety really rocks! Not to mention the dangers of drinking that staying sober eliminates.
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Old 04-11-2010, 04:08 PM
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Read here watsonc. Read everyday.
Not just this forum, but Alcoholism as well - and Family and Friends.

That's the best way I know to challenge those romantic notions, and re-commit oneself to sobriety

D
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Old 04-11-2010, 08:32 PM
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Yep. SR everyday. Several times a day.
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Old 04-11-2010, 08:57 PM
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Keep coming here... I'm sorry your struggling. <3 Hang in there you can do this. You can stay sober it's hard but it can be done.
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Old 04-11-2010, 11:59 PM
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I have those "romantic notions" as well. I work in a restaurant (where about 35% of our sales are alcohol) and see our customers, many of whom are my friends, and employees (after work, of course) hanging out and having fun and enjoying a few drinks. I find myself thinking, "I can do that. 1 beer and 1 shot won't hurt."

But the problem is, I know that when those people leave and go home, they'll probably have a nice feeling from the alcohol, watch a little TV and head to bed.

I, on the other hand, even if I controlled my drinking in public, would likely pick up a 24-oz beer to drink on the drive home and kill a 6-pack of tall boys once I got to the house. Or as many of the 6 as I could drink before I blacked out and passed out on the couch in my clothes and sweat from the night at work.

That's where my problem lies. Heck yeah, I'd love to be like most people and have a couple drinks, not have a problem cutting myself off, and have a lovely evening. That's unfortunately not how I operate. That 1 drink for me leads to a lot of bad stuff that the majority of the population doesn't have to worry about. And that kinda sucks, but all I can do is play the hand I've been dealt. I got a problem, and I can either ignore it and allow it to destroy me, or I can man up and attack it head on. I've chosen the latter.
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Old 04-12-2010, 12:21 AM
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For me, there was a big difference between abstinence and recovery. I can't abstain and feel good about it, but I can feel good in active recovery. AA, SR, helping other alcoholics -- that is what does it for me. There is no silver bullet, though, just a lot of honesty, open mindedness, and hard work. But, it is so so worth it.
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Old 04-12-2010, 05:19 AM
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I had nothing but romantic notions about my drinking for nearly 30 years. Those romantic notions finally landed me in the hospital, thinking I was losing my mind.

Nobody was going to hold my hand and make it stop...I had to dig down deep and find the strength to finally change my ways. That was almost 10 months ago and I can honestly say that my worst day sober has been WAY better than my best day drunk.

It takes a lot of soul searching, but we can and do recover.
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