new to recovery
 

I am a new member to this site. I have decided after a rough night and all day hangover that I am quitting drinking forever. I have had hundreds of failed attempts in the past. Heres my bio Im a very successful person. I make great money and own my own business which enables me to go out and drink / party. I literally spend close twenty thousand dollars a year on bars and buying drinks for people ect. I live alone and i do not drink by myself. I have periods of sobriety 3 weeks at the max. This year I have developed severe anxiety expecially when im hungover. I have went to the er twice this year thinking i was going to die after a rough night of drinking and doing coke. The only reason I ever tried coke was due to lowered ambitions with alcohol. I have never had the support group mentality until now. I need some help quitting bad. I probably drink three nights a week. 2 of the nights I slam shots and guzzle beers till 3 am. I party at bars and have tons of friends that drink. My main problem is I can stay sober for 2 or 3 weeks then I feel so good and healthy again I go out and do whatever I want. Very destructive. So I am giving this a try and could really use some sober friends and some ideas so i dont forget why I am quitting drinking.

Welcome to SR! :grouphug: I think it's a wise move to stop drinking as it's a progressive disease and will only get worse. I too used to get horrible anxiety after drinking. Now that I'm sober my anxiety and depression are more manageable with my meds. Now that I'm sober I no longer worry about money spent on alcohol or the many bad possibilities that can happen from drinking.

I hope we can give you the information and support you need to stop drinking for good.:)

one of my main questions is why am I not maintaining long term sobriety? I truely believe if i can get to 2 months I am so strong willed and smart i will make it forever. I really dont want to go out and disclose to my co workers that I have a problem. I just want to quit work hard help people stay sober. My new girlfriend thank god does not drink. So I am going to be spending alot of time with her. My anxiety seems to cure itself around the end of week two. But **** I feel miserable from a rough night. How long can expect for my brain to start healing so I can be a champion again. Thank god for easter I dont have to work until monday. So I should be detoxed and somewhat rested by then.

Looking back, I'd say when the anxiety and depression started to kick in following a drunken episode was when my drinking started progressively getting out of hand. I only wish I'd realised then and properly enjoyed the last six or seven years of my life.

Heed the warnings, I wish I did.

Hi timeforachange4

Welcome to SR :)

I'm strong willed and smart too - it sadly means nothing when faced with an addiction.

If you're like me, it's not about weakness and it's not about brute strength, it's about accepting that you can't drink like others can.

Your two months off should give you an indication of whether you're a normal drinker in a bad patch...or an alcoholic like me :)

Keep posting - you'll find a lot of help and support here :)
D

Hey man, I'm in the Big O as well! Man, I must have been at the wrong bars or we would have been best friends, throwing down 20k a year on booze. That's impressive.

I would have to say that you answered your own question in your first post, about not able to stay sober for longer than two to three weeks. You feel re-energized, your body feels good, and that first drink after three weeks tastes so damn good. I'm not sure you said the latter, but that is from what I remember.

Anyways, it's pretty hard after two or three weeks, to stay sober unless you have some serious determination. You've got to be pissed off, bottomed out, or just realize deep down that alcohol is no good. It's worthless.

Good luck man, and hope this thread grows after I post this morning.

Welcome to SR 10yrwasteland :)

Good to have you with us
D