New Guy

Old 04-02-2010, 06:34 PM
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New Guy

Hi. Found this site about six months ago and read a ton of posts and thought man I might have a drinking problem. I didn't do anything about it because the thought of not drinking beer was impossible for me. Its who I am. How can I be me and not drink beer?

Well I came back to the site a week or so ago. I started reading posts and I know I have to make a change. The thing that made me think it might be possible was all the talk about not drinking today. It's impossible to think about not drinking for the rest of my life but I have been able to not drink today for 6 days. Which is unbelievable, but is very very very hard. I'm not sure how much I will post but it has helped coming here and reading posts each day.
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Old 04-02-2010, 06:38 PM
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Hi and Welcome!

Good for you having 6 days sober! It really can be overwhelming to think of 'forever', so focusing on the day can really help. I hope you keep reading and posting because there is lots of inspiration here.
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Old 04-02-2010, 06:38 PM
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I have been able to not drink today for 6 days.

well, maybe not unbelievable, (i believe you) but a miracle!
thank you for posting trysober.
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Old 04-02-2010, 06:46 PM
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Tell yourself right now that you wont drink tomorrow.. and you know what I will do the same!
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Old 04-02-2010, 06:52 PM
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bona fido dog-lover
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Welcome to SR! You can only live one day at a time so why not stay sober one day at a time? It does make it easier for me sometimes to just not drink TODAY, and not worry about tomorrow or next week or next month. I've now been sober one day at a time for just over 100 days, and feel so much better in every way. I hope we can give you the info and support you need to stay sober.
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Old 04-02-2010, 06:52 PM
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Thanks for the responses. Fridays are by the far the hardest for me. Thats what finally got me to sign up tonight.
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Old 04-02-2010, 06:57 PM
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There's awesome support and wisdom on this forum - sometimes when you just need to get rid of the free floating stuff in your head in early sobriety, it's great to come here and just type-talk out loud - it helps - and we've been where you're at.

My early sobriety was not just filled with one day at a time - heck, sometimes it was an hour at a time - whatever it takes. It's an adjustment and it's important to re-center ourselves and develop healthier habits to eliminate the stress or whatever we used alcohol as a crutch for (and alcohol is beer, wine, spirits - all the same).

Something cool that I do is start my day over at any time of the day if things are going crappy. If it's 10am and the morning was full of headaches, traffic, whatever, I wouldn't let that set the precedent for the rest of the day - I'd just take a breath and turn the morning over and act as if the day's starting over again, kinda like a clean slate - it's pretty refreshing.

Again, welcome. Look forward to seeing you around here.
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Old 04-02-2010, 06:58 PM
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Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
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for sharing with us.....Welcome!

You are really doing the best thing for yourself
and your loved ones by quitting....

All my best as you continue to win over alcohol!
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Old 04-02-2010, 07:04 PM
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I like that idea Humble. I'll have to give that a try. Still wrapping my head around the whole not drinking thing. My wife has been very supportive, but it has helped a lot reading posts of people going through the same thing.
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Old 04-02-2010, 07:49 PM
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hi TrySober

Welcome to SR!
How can I be me and not drink beer?
Yep. That was me. Beer was Dee - it was part of who I was - it went basically everywhere with me that I could get away with it.

When that became harder and harder - cos I was drinking more and more - I just stayed home.

Eventually I drank all day everyday,,,and eventually I had to quit - it was either that, or die.

I was scared of who I'd be too - but the thing is, I actually became me again. A me I'd forgotten about...a me who existed before I started drinking, but with the added experience and wisdom that comes from lots of mistakes LOL.

And he's a guy I kinda like

What everyone else says is spot on...forever can be just too big to get your head around...and it needn't be any more complicated, or 'big' than not drinking today.

No matter what anyone else tells you I reckon that's all any of us can do

I hope you check in more than occasionally - this is a great place for support.
Good to have you with us

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Old 04-02-2010, 08:16 PM
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Thanks for the inspiration Dee. After six days I'm really starting to see how much drinking consumed my life. I thought I had it under control but a six day sober mind is already is starting to see how much of a problem I have. I hope I can reconnect and find "me" like you have.
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Old 04-02-2010, 08:19 PM
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This is a great place to start doing that TrySober

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Old 04-02-2010, 10:03 PM
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I am on my 6th day too! You did well to join this crowd, they are all an inspiration. You will find it is great having people on your side and there at any time for a little support and inspiration.

Keep posting and sharing, it is what gets me through the day.
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Old 04-02-2010, 11:12 PM
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Snarf Snarf
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TrySober, I'm about 2 hours into my 10th day. I'm having a blast. Oh yeah, I was the beer guy. I work in a restaurant, and whenever they would talk about putting a new beer on tap, I was the guy they came to. Heck, before I went back to school this semester, I was the bar manager. I put whatever beer I wanted on tap. And that meant I got free samples of lots of beer (and liquor, too. I did like the shots when I was out). And I always had beer wherever I was. Tailgating for a football/baseball game, drinking in the stadium, drinking at home, drinking in the car, drinking at my friends' houses, drinking at bars, just drinking lots of beer. All. The. Time.

But I'm seeing a better way now. I echo what Dee said: I don't feel like a new person. I feel like me again, like that 18-year-old kid before the 12-pack-a-day habit set in. I enjoy my day now, rather than dreading it. I smile and laugh, rather than puke and moan. And I feel feelings again. Good and bad.

My sponsor says I'm a rare case. I guess lots of people go into AA with hesitation and are not very receptive to what is being said in the rooms. I know that was the case for me 4 years ago. But this time, I knew it was the end for me. I went in there guns blazing, attended 8 meetings the first 2 days (now at 23 in 9), bought the books, went to work, got a sponsor, joined this site, and pretty much spend all my free time away from work, school and meetings (not much free time) on here talking to people like me, reading the literature and studying this deadly disease of alcoholism, with which I am definitely afflicted. I experienced something over a week ago that flipped the switch, for lack of a better term. And I can't express how thankful I am that happened.

I think if you want to get sober for the right reasons, and if you truly are committed to it, you will find that the fun you can have without beer (or whatever your fancy) is leaps and bounds above the fun you can have getting drunk. And you actually remember it all, don't feel like crap the next day, have more money in your pocket and more energy in your body! Like I said, I'm digging it.
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Old 04-03-2010, 12:32 AM
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Land of Suits and Ties
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I'm just about to hit the forty-eight hour mark -- (so I guess I'm basically just one night + a bit, no room to talk, but the posting helps).

But, I agree, Fridays are scary. Or, at least, I've been wondering what a today would bring. I had multiple friends and family, as well as someone I haven't seen in ages, call me out of the blue tonight. "It's a holiday, we're at the bar...." I declined and put in some much needed work time instead. In a way they couldn't have called at a worse time for me, but in the end I think it was maybe the best; because I declined and, somewhat shockingly, I'm okay about it.

I guess it's not that Fridays are scary, but that this Friday is/was. Maybe someday I can say something about how Friday is scary in the plural.
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