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-   -   new and dont know what to do. (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/197868-new-dont-know-what-do.html)

hopefeen 03-31-2010 09:04 AM

new and dont know what to do.
 
Im an 18 year old female who has about 47 days sober right now. This is by far the most difficult thing ive ever been faced with. right now im in the "recovery sucks" stage. i feel like im going to miss ouut on alot in my life because i cant use drugs or alcohol ever again. i know how bad things got for me when i was using. so i know that soberiety is what i need. its just it sucks to think that i cant use and regulate it like some people do. Also, im still in highschool at the moment and peer pressure sucks. i havent been to school sober since 8th grade and going back just felt wierd. a bunch of old friends that i used with, hell i even used in the bathroom at school. so going back felt wierd. I just dont really know what to do right now. i mean i go to meetings like 2 times a day, but i havent gotten a sponsor yet and have trouble picking up the phone. advice?

HumbleBee 03-31-2010 09:20 AM

Welcome. So glad you're here.

Alot of us could tell your story and have felt the same way only to find that it was actually the drinking and drugging that caused us to lose out on life, not the other way around.

My advice...continue hanging out with sober people - believe it or not, we are not boring. :lmao I had never laughed so much in my life than when I began living in recovery, as opposed to just not drinking and there is a world of difference between the two.

Congratulations on your sober time. Do you have a plan or program for living in recovery? Having one, as opposed to just not picking up, makes all the difference - posting here is awesome too. Look around and read and learn from others like me who can share how much we pain we could have avoided if we had stopped at 18. Peer pressure at that age is hard - it takes a stronger person to not be like the pack and assume control over their own life. Good for you.

least 03-31-2010 09:34 AM

:welcome to SR! The 'recovery sucks' stage is a bear to get thru, but it does go away. I agree with having a good support system in place, whether AA or counseling or just coming here a lot. It helps to have others who understand us.:) I hope we can give you information to help you stay sober and lead a rewarding life. SR has been a valuable resource to me, I hope it is for you also.

keithj 03-31-2010 09:42 AM


Originally Posted by hopefeen (Post 2556620)
i mean i go to meetings like 2 times a day, but i havent gotten a sponsor yet and have trouble picking up the phone. advice?

Yep. Get a sponsor and call them. Work the Steps like your life depends on it. Start reading the Doctor's Opinion and first 44 pages and underline everything having to do with hopelessness, powelessness, insanity, despair, torture, lack of control, obsession, etc. See where you relate to Bill's Story. Turn all the statements in Chapters 2-3 into questions and answer them using your own experience.

NewMe11109 03-31-2010 09:28 PM

Hi Hopefeen -

Congrats on 47 days. Recovery does get better, it just takes some time.

After a while, you will be happy to not drink/drug, but I know it is hard at first.

There are a lot of young person's AA groups and they have lots of great activities; dances, trips, socials, etc. -- all without alcohol.

Once you start hanging out with other sober people, you will realize that we all have a good time together. We are not a glum lot (as the Big Book says) and it is true.

Don't worry about not drinking for the rest of your life, just focus on not drinking today. I view my sobriety as just putting together lots of single days of not drinking. To do this, I work on my recovery every day. It doesn't take a lot of time, but it keeps me in the present and silences all those little voices that take you to the wrong place.

Be proud of yourself. You are doing a great thing for yourself and your future.


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