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3 days sober

Old 04-01-2010, 03:49 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by foxy0116 View Post
Well its now late on my day of being sober. 23:41pm and not a drop has passed these lips! I even managed to watch my beloved Arsenal FC draw against Barcelona with only Coffee to drink. Im feeling really proud of myself at the moment but tomorrow is another day.
I have been invited to the pub (bar) by some friends tomorrow. I said id come. Thoughts?
Congrats on 4 days sober, it sounds like you are kicking a very serious habit.

In terms of going to the pub, I found that I had to change my playground (bars and pubs) and playmates (drinking buddies) in order to achieve lasting sobriety.

Where are you in the UK? There are plenty of your countrymen here if that's the case. Let us know how that first AA meeting goes.
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Old 04-01-2010, 04:35 AM
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Im based in Leicester dgillz very near the city centre. Im feeling very strong today and really want to test my resolve tonight. It may sound stupid, and probably is, but I want to prove to myself that I dont need booze to be sociable. Im going to this and if the urge gets too much get a taxi and go home or tell my mate I cant stay and see if he will leave with me. Im not sure about AA at the moment as I have never believed in spirituality or god. I hope not to offend anybody that does. My strength right now is my children. I need to prove to their mother that I can do this and be a responsible Dad. Your comments and advice are an inspiration to me. Wish id found this place years ago!!!! Would prob not be in this mess now
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Old 04-01-2010, 06:22 AM
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hi foxy, glad to hear your positive outlook. well can't chat long, have work to do. just wanted you to know i am thinking about you and praying/sending good vibes your way. :ghug3
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Old 04-01-2010, 06:34 AM
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Originally Posted by newagain View Post
hi foxy, glad to hear your positive outlook. well can't chat long, have work to do. just wanted you to know i am thinking about you and praying/sending good vibes your way. :ghug3
Thank you

I actually feel full of energy today, I have written practically an essay to my wife, written a poem and done 30 push ups and 30 sit ups. Now eating a salad, and guess what? Its not making me feel sick!!! I think all the water I have been drinking may have flushed out most of the alcohol. Now comes the mental part I guess?
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Old 04-01-2010, 07:01 AM
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Glad you're doing well, foxy. Keep it up!

I find that I have to speak to other people who have suffered the same problems as myself. This site has fantastic people that fit that bill perfectly. I've also found fact-to-face conversations to be extremely helpful. AA has been my source for that, but I'm sure there are many options available to you in the UK. Keep looking and trying until you find what works.
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Old 04-01-2010, 08:15 AM
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Originally Posted by Snarf View Post
Glad you're doing well, foxy. Keep it up!

I find that I have to speak to other people who have suffered the same problems as myself. This site has fantastic people that fit that bill perfectly. I've also found fact-to-face conversations to be extremely helpful. AA has been my source for that, but I'm sure there are many options available to you in the UK. Keep looking and trying until you find what works.
Thank you for your support!

Talking on here is really helping me to get through this. A lot of people just dont seem to understand what im going through but here there are people who know what they are talking about. Fells like home and i have only been here 2 days
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Old 04-01-2010, 09:54 AM
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Originally Posted by foxy0116 View Post
Thank you for your support!

Talking on here is really helping me to get through this. A lot of people just dont seem to understand what im going through but here there are people who know what they are talking about. Fells like home and i have only been here 2 days
This has actually been the easy bit in the past for me, believe it or not. It's a week or two down the line when you feel 'good' and you think that you could maybe 'go for a couple of pints' or if a party comes up or even going to a football match that I find I always fall down and invariably 'a couple of pints' ends up multiple day bender that ends in myself being in tears and feeling alienated and depressed.

Agree with you about this place, though. I'm very glad I found it.
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Old 04-01-2010, 09:55 AM
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Ok right so I have just looked again on the AA site and have found a meeting quite close by on Saturday. Problem is, I really do not believe in GOD and never have. Im actually not too sure whether to attend or not?!? I know id lose nothing for attending but am actually quite scared to go. Silly I know
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Old 04-01-2010, 10:00 AM
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Originally Posted by FrankBarone View Post
This has actually been the easy bit in the past for me, believe it or not. It's a week or two down the line when you feel 'good' and you think that you could maybe 'go for a couple of pints' or if a party comes up or even going to a football match that I find I always fall down and invariably 'a couple of pints' ends up multiple day bender that ends in myself being in tears and feeling alienated and depressed.

Agree with you about this place, though. I'm very glad I found it.
I really dont have enough experience in quitting and being sober so I dont know what it will be like in 2 weeks, or even if I will make 2 weeks!! Im feeding myself to the Lions tonight by meeting some friends at the pub. I just hope my willpower is enough to overcome the temptation. People say that an alcoholic should never visit a bar/pub but all of my friends are there tonight. So I have 2 choices, 1. Stay home thinking about all my friends getting drunk or 2. Join them but only drink diet coke. I have chosen 2 as I know too well what I am like on my own. Thats my drinking time usually!!!
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Old 04-01-2010, 10:05 AM
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I remember going into a pub for the first time and not drinking. I just drank diet tonic. It felt really really weird. In fact one of the surprising things looking around me was how many other people there were who were not drinking alcohol either.
Having said that I felt very uncomfortable and I tend to choose to avoid situations where alcohol is around.
All the best foxy!
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Old 04-01-2010, 03:28 PM
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hey foxy

I'm not a AA member, but I'm sure others who are will be along to tell you that a belief in God is absolutely not necessary there.

Go ahead and hit a meeting - I'm reliably informed they don't lock the doors either so you can leave anytime - what have you got to lose?

D
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Old 04-01-2010, 03:49 PM
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Hi Guys,

So I went to the pub tonight and have returned home sober, before closing time and right now am pretty damn pleased with myself

I wont deny that it was hard, no hard's not the word it was immensely hard! I got offered drinks but for the first time in my life I said NO! When asked why I told people, some got it, some didn't but I did it! Dont think it is something that I want to repeat any time soon though and I can understand why a lot of you advised against it.

There were a few moments where I really wanted a drink but I just hogged a pool table and for the first time ever, played well! Im looking into AA tomorrow, but a friend of mine has also given me the name of very good rehab counsellor. She is a youth worker and has had many positive results with the man. Im so glad I found this place, without all your advice I would have given into temptation long ago!!!
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Old 04-01-2010, 05:56 PM
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Originally Posted by foxy0116 View Post
Hi Guys,

So I went to the pub tonight and have returned home sober, before closing time and right now am pretty damn pleased with myself

I wont deny that it was hard, no hard's not the word it was immensely hard! I got offered drinks but for the first time in my life I said NO! When asked why I told people, some got it, some didn't but I did it! Dont think it is something that I want to repeat any time soon though and I can understand why a lot of you advised against it.

There were a few moments where I really wanted a drink but I just hogged a pool table and for the first time ever, played well! Im looking into AA tomorrow, but a friend of mine has also given me the name of very good rehab counsellor. She is a youth worker and has had many positive results with the man. Im so glad I found this place, without all your advice I would have given into temptation long ago!!!
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Old 04-01-2010, 07:56 PM
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hi foxy

i've just read through your thread for the first time and have really enjoyed your first couple days of sobriety. it is the hardest thing that i've ever done and am doing again today.

you dont' need to 'believe in god' to attend meetings or even to stay sober. many people say you do and the "big book" says that also...but people have and do get sober without god, and the big book also talks about that and that it worked for some back in the day (the 30's)

the important thing is to have an open mind towards spiritual principals. such would be: Honesty, Openminded-ness, willingness. the acronym of H.O.W.

I'm proud of you. go ahead and try some meetings if you can muster up the courage. maybe try 3 or 7 or 90 meetings no matter what, before you begin to decide if it might be for you.

You can do this. You NEVER have to take another drink. One is too many and a thousand is not enough
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Old 04-02-2010, 01:28 AM
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So its now day 5, and I actually managed near on 6hrs sleep last night!!! I would only sleep for a maximum of 7/8 when drinking so I am almost, almost sleeping normally (still wake a few times and lots of sweats)

It is a very important day for me today, not only for a milestone of 5 days (has been many years since i abstained for this long) but today I meet my wife to try and sort out the mess I have created. I know the relationship is not salvageable but I hope to be able to get access to my children, and soon! I know its early days but I really think I can beat this! You guys, along with my best friend have been my rock and thank you all so much!

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Old 04-02-2010, 01:36 AM
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Hey Foxy

We Shall Overcome! (M.L. King)

Good for you, your getting YOUR life back, your children will follow and let's hope your wife does, too. You are a great Dad, although giving up the beast is first and foremost for you, you are giving your children a gift that money can't buy!

Keep up the good work!:ghug3

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Old 04-02-2010, 01:41 AM
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Originally Posted by LifeIs View Post
We Shall Overcome! (M.L. King)

Good for you, your getting YOUR life back, your children will follow and let's hope your wife does, too. You are a great Dad, although giving up the beast is first and foremost for you, you are giving your children a gift that money can't buy!

Keep up the good work!:ghug3

Life Is....
Thank you

It feels like I have turned a corner. I know its still (very) early days but I am better than this addiction and feel like kicking its ass for holding me down so long!!!
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Old 04-02-2010, 04:06 AM
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Ok so the positive chirpy attitude of this morning has passed and I now cant stop crying! So scared il relapse if she still doesnt let me see my kids!!!
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Old 04-02-2010, 04:29 AM
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Foxy, try not to give in to all-or-nothing thinking. Imagine the possibility that she won't let you see the children, now. You have five days sobriety. I don't know what has gone on in the past, but she may need a longer period of sobriety before she trusts you. that doesn't mean you'll never see your kids again if she says no today. You have to keep workiing at it, regaining her trust day by day, staying sober one day at a time. It took longer than 5 days to get to this point. You can do it, always keep your goal in mind. You're doing great!
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Old 04-02-2010, 04:44 AM
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Originally Posted by NellieM View Post
Foxy, try not to give in to all-or-nothing thinking. Imagine the possibility that she won't let you see the children, now. You have five days sobriety. I don't know what has gone on in the past, but she may need a longer period of sobriety before she trusts you. that doesn't mean you'll never see your kids again if she says no today. You have to keep workiing at it, regaining her trust day by day, staying sober one day at a time. It took longer than 5 days to get to this point. You can do it, always keep your goal in mind. You're doing great!
Hi Nellie thanks for replying. Well after speaking some more to my friend (who has arranged the meeting on my behalf) this morning about why she has stopped me seeing them, he said that when I called her(at the end of the longest bender ever) that whilst there was the normal arguments I also said that id burn the house down!! Makes me feel sick seeing that in writing as its something I WOULD NEVER DO!!! I cant remember anything of this conversation and is why im trying to get sober. I know in the past when I "blackout" Iv said similar things to people, but never to my family and the ones I love the most. Im disgusted with myself and don't blame her for not wanting me around. Im a monster when drunk! I don't know how I could ever earn that trust back because I would hate and want to murder anybody that put my family in danger, or threatened them. Iv made such a mess of things
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