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Just over a month and doing well, despite daily pressures

Old 03-25-2010, 04:34 PM
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Just over a month and doing well, despite daily pressures

Last drink, 2/20 (a.m.). Hung tough. My wife is a coumadin patient and a bleeder, has had 2 near fatal bleeding incidents in her past. Just recently had another and 2 trips to the ER and then admitted to a local hospital last week, (she just got out today), really took a toll on me but I did not drink. It's like when I quit smoking in 2000, once I was set firmly in my mind that that behavior was no longer optional for my long term existance, it was a no brainer to stop, tho the cravings lasted, it was easier to say no. Drinking was the same, I "relapsed" many times in past attempts, but last month, I decided drinking was no longer optional for my survival and for those who depended on me. Touch and go for abit, but did not cave. Still alcohol free for just over a month after many, many years of daily drinking and many past attempts at quitting. I have been too pre-occupied with my wifes health to post much here, tho I have been reading posts here whenever I had time. I am not qualified to reply to postings here as I am still "recovering", but every post I read here helps me stay comitted to my long term goal.

Just wanted to pass on my continued "success" and thanks for all the people here who gave me confidence and strength to carry on and do the hard thing in the short term to better exist in the long term.

Thanks greatly for everyone here for their moral support, I am gratefull for it every day!

Peace,
Mike
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Old 03-25-2010, 04:47 PM
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Way to go on your sober time!!
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Old 03-25-2010, 04:50 PM
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Hi Mike,

It's good to hear from you, and I hope that your wife is doing better now.

I know exactly what you are saying. I relapsed many times while attempting to stop, but once I made the decision that drinking was never an option, it worked for me. When I was newly sober, we went through a few months where a stranger was actively stalking my then 19-year old daughter. It was a nightmare, but I knew that if I could get through that without drinking, I would have it made.
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Old 03-25-2010, 04:53 PM
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Mike, I was wondering how you were. Congratulations on your accomplishment. That's wonderful news.

(By the way, I was still drinking when I first joined SR & I still posted - there's no problem with that. We're glad to hear from you anytime!)
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Old 03-25-2010, 05:05 PM
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Way to go Mike!
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Old 03-25-2010, 09:24 PM
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Good to hear from you Mike

I know what you mean about getting to the point where drinking is not longer a viable option...keep it up!

best to you and your wife
D
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Old 03-25-2010, 10:05 PM
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Originally Posted by BurningChrome View Post
Last drink, 2/20 (a.m.).
...once I was set firmly in my mind that that behavior was no longer optional for my long term existance, it was a no brainer to stop, tho the cravings lasted, it was easier to say no. Drinking was the same, I "relapsed" many times in past attempts, but last month, I decided drinking was no longer optional for my survival and for those who depended on me. in the short term to better exist in the long term.
Mike -
Please don't say you're not qualified to reply to postings. I want to let you know that your post just really touched me. I can really relate to what you said about once deciding that drinking was just no longer an option, it completely changed your mindset about it. I found I had the same experience, and it was really nice to see that you shared that view. We're all works in progress...working on recovery. Please don't feel that you can't post. You never know who you will touch/help with what you say. We are all valuable contributors...including you! :day6
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Old 03-26-2010, 09:18 PM
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Thank you everyone for your words and messages of support, they truly do help me in a big way! Just an FYI, took my wife to her spine/pain management doctor this morning and then her cardiologist to discuss her blood thinner usage, as she needs Coumadin to not throw a clot (she had decades old afib and 2 fake heart valves), but we find that she is very sensitive to her coumadin dosage and has a higher risk of internal bleeding than throwing a clot. Anyway, after all that, I took her to a well deserved nice dinner (with delicious iced water to drink, Hehe, :-), then took her to a Talbots clothing store and let her shop for almost 3 hours. It's just amazing how how much your tolerance grows with someone you love after almost losing them 3 times :-)

Still alcohol free and see no reason to go back. My wife has more physical testing next Monday and a lower spinal MRI next Tuesday to detect any additional bleeding, may go back to work shortly after that.

Sigh, I do so much miss my evening shots to relieve more stress than I feel I deserve, but... slowly learning other ways to deal with that. It took me a decade to get into my current alcohol "dependency" situation, I know it will take me some time to more fully get over it. Having two direct blood relatives who had serious alcohol problems, I knew better than to start ever drinking and did it anyway, as Homer Simpson says: "DOAH!! Stupid brain!!". Again, not as much time to post here as 'd like but I do read postings by others every chance I get. Just wanted to pass on that my wife is doing worlds better than she was just a week or so ago and that in itself, makes it easier on me. I wish everyone else here the strength and will to do what they know they must do!

Peace,

..Mike
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Old 03-26-2010, 09:26 PM
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So good to see that you are both doing well.
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Old 03-27-2010, 05:45 AM
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Hi Mike;

glad you are doing well....(my last drink was on Feb. 16)...we are running about the same in sobriety....yes, I miss my nightly wine too to unwind....but I have made substitutions to the routine and it helps to develop new habits.

glad to hear that your wife's PT levels are staying in line...and that she is doing better (no blood clots I hope)...trips to the ER are stressful for both of you.
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Old 03-27-2010, 09:13 PM
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Congratulations with your sobriety! We're glad you're here!
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Old 03-27-2010, 09:34 PM
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Hey Burning Chrome, glad to hear that you have 30 days. That is great news! Also, I wish a healthy recovery for your wife. I'm a couple of days away from 30 days and I'm posting a lot on here. Even though, we might not have many days of sobriety, it doesnt mean that we dont have past experiences. You mentioned that you have tried several times to quit and it resulted to many relapses. I'm sure you learned something from those relapses or even if you didnt, you at least know what didnt work, right? I'm in the AA program and I believe that every person who has the desire to quit drinking carries the message. Basically, people share their stories, whether 10 days sober or 10 years sober, in order to maybe keep another person in the meeting sober for just another day or even another hour.

I came from a meeting yesterday and they emphasized on the fact that an alcoholic with 15 years of sobriety is no better than a person with 30 days of sobriety. In AA, we learn to just take one day at a time because we are all susceptible to relapsing the very next day. I dont know if you do work a program but i'm sure you have read on this forum that it is highly recommended to find a program. Anyways, I digress. Great job on the 30 days!
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Old 03-28-2010, 10:04 AM
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Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
 
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Way to go on your sober time ...

All my best to you and your wife
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Old 03-28-2010, 10:25 AM
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Congrats on the sober time! My counselor once told me that success in long term sobriety was finding the way to stay sober not just daily with normal life happenings, but also when life took a turn to 'bring me to my knees' in sadness, stress, anger, etc.. It's the true test of one's new abilities to cope in a different way than before. You're doing so well, and please don't feel you're not qualified to post here.. you absolutely are, we can learn SO much from each other at every stage of sobriety/recovery.. it's a journey, not a destination..

Glad you're here!
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