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Old 03-15-2010, 10:05 AM
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First Day

Hi everyone,

I was online looking for some help/support and came across this site. I'm not really sure how this all works but am very hopeful
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Old 03-15-2010, 10:10 AM
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Hi Joseph,

Welcome!

I'm glad you found us.
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Old 03-15-2010, 10:12 AM
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Thanks so much Anna. I think I'm a bit overwhelmed by this site though. Does one have to follow the AA program to be involved in this site? I know it works and have been to some meetings but it honestly isn't for me. Are there any other options for me?
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Old 03-15-2010, 10:12 AM
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Hello Joseph,
Welcome to SR!
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Old 03-15-2010, 10:32 AM
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Hi Joseph! I do not follow AA, (it's not for me either at this time)...there are other options you can pursue and I'm sure someone with better knowledge will explain to you shortly.

I found the site the same way you did and have been using it as my support and sounding board, (i'm newly sober for 4 weeks). It has been very helpful and the people here are helpful and very kind.
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Old 03-15-2010, 10:38 AM
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Welcome Joseph and to answer your question - no.
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Old 03-15-2010, 10:48 AM
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Originally Posted by Fandy View Post
Hi Joseph! I do not follow AA, (it's not for me either at this time)...there are other options you can pursue and I'm sure someone with better knowledge will explain to you shortly.

I found the site the same way you did and have been using it as my support and sounding board, (i'm newly sober for 4 weeks). It has been very helpful and the people here are helpful and very kind.
Thank you for posting Congrats on your 4 weeks!!! I am on day 1.
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Old 03-15-2010, 10:54 AM
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Welcome Joseph.

To answer your question, I guess it depends on the person. I was adamant when I first tried getting sober that I did NOT need AA. I tried every other way - willpower, self help books (including one entitled "How to Get Sober without AA", or some such thing), white-knuckling, even the marijuana maintenance program

For me, personally, nothing worked until I finally surrendered my will completely, turned my life over to the power of God as I understood him, and gave myself to the AA program. But maybe that's just me.

At any rate, I hope you find a path that works for you.
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Old 03-15-2010, 10:57 AM
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I'm not sure what I am. Am I an alcoholic? An alcohol abuser? I don't know.
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Old 03-15-2010, 11:00 AM
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Try going to a bar, or to your home after work, and having just one drink. Just one. See what happens.

I couldn't do that...that's how I came to recognize myself as an alcoholic. "Just one" meant nothing to me once I started. I was on a mission of self destruction, and would keep going until I blacked out.
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Old 03-15-2010, 11:09 AM
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I can have just one but then there are times when I just drink because its there. If there's something in front of me; water, soda, beer, wine, whatever I will drink it all down.
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Old 03-15-2010, 11:14 AM
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Originally Posted by Joseph1 View Post
Thank you for posting Congrats on your 4 weeks!!! I am on day 1.
Welcome Joseph. You know what, we all only have today and the one that woke up the earliest has the most sobriety for that day. We are only give today, tomorrow isn't here, and yesterday is gone. I woke up at 11:00am so I am a newcomer probably today

Just wanted to say hey
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Old 03-15-2010, 11:15 AM
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Welcome Joseph. You know what, we all only have today and the one that woke up the earliest has the most sobriety for that day. We are only give today, tomorrow isn't here, and yesterday is gone. I woke up at 11:00am so I am a newcomer probably today

Just wanted to say hey
Thanks for your words Chance. Nice to meet you
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Old 03-15-2010, 11:24 AM
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Welcome Joseph! I dreaded using the word "alcoholic" and avoided it for years. When I came here I learned to finally admit what I am. I had so much company here - so much understanding - I wasn't alone anymore. I got the courage to quit after 25 yrs. of playing with it. My life had turned into chaos and I was a slave to alcohol.

You seem unsure of where you stand with it. Before I reached the final stages I went through all sorts of phases with my drinking - I was able to control it when I was much younger, but it finally overtook me. Alcohol was in charge of my life. If you are having problems now, there is the possibility that down the line you'll become more dependent on it. I'm sure you've heard the phrase, "alcoholism is a progressive disease". Only you can determine whether or not you're an alcoholic - but maybe reading & posting here will help you decide what steps to take. I don't attend AA meetings at the present time either, but know many who feel it saved their life.

We're glad you are here & hope to learn more about you.
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Old 03-15-2010, 11:32 AM
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I am so blessed to have found this site and all of you.
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Old 03-15-2010, 11:41 AM
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Joseph; take your time , look around , read and ask questions....someone will always answer them at some point.
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Old 03-15-2010, 04:11 PM
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Joseph, I noticed you mention that AA is probably not the way to go for you and that you are wondering where you stand as far as alcohol goes. You mentioned you were overwhelmed.

I think I posted a message somewhere about me managing to get something out of AA even though I am not going to meetings. I think the name of the thread that somebody started is called My First Step. Haven't checked if you were there yet, but there might be something worth reading there.

It sounded like your mind was racing a bit. If AA is not going to work, then set that aside for now. If you are worried about what to call yourself, set that aside too. Just read and post what you are feeling. I think it is a good thing that you came to this site, because you will find people that understand - many different kinds of people.

I don't think I have looked at all your posts yet, so I could be missing info you already shared...What do you think about alcohol, why do you want to stop? I compare alcohol to a false friend, a false medicine. It was there to block out certain feelings, but it didn't cure anything. It blocked out life.

Start with you and look inside and describe it. It felt like an amazing stroke of luck for me to reach a moment when I was able to stop. I'm so glad I have met people who have also stopped after years of putting on the fake bandage and doing harm to their mind and body. I'm also thrilled that people younger than me can do that too. Everyone who has been through that experience has a similar part to them, no matter how different they may be (how they look; write posts; earn money; whatever). Not everyone stays away from drinking with the same methods. People are not identical in the ways they would experience alcohol either, ie, not everyone would get drunk every day. But everyone UNDERSTANDS what it means to suffer in alcohol. It's the relationship with alcohol that needs to be looked at.

You don't have to be concerned about condemning words. I will listen and so will many people here. You won't be alone.
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Old 03-15-2010, 04:22 PM
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Hi Joseph

As others have said, this is not an AA board, but you will find a lot of people here are in AA...other people use other programmes like SMART or LifeRing, or some kind of counselling...we're open to a lot of approaches here.

As for worrying about whether you're an alcoholic or not - I always advise people to look at the facts and worry about the labels later - you're obviously here because you feel there is a problem with your drinking and, with all due respect to whoever suggested it here, I really doubt you need to go out and test yourself over it again.

I didn't really know what I wanted when I came here - I just knew I hated my life and I hated what my relationship with alcohol had done to me.

I read a lot here, posted a lot...and the folks here helped me sort some things out.

I'll be 3 years sober in about 3 weeks - and thats still miraculous to me.

If I can do it, anyone can LOL

Welcome to SR Joseph
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Old 03-15-2010, 05:09 PM
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Old 03-16-2010, 08:37 AM
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I'm not sure what I am. Am I an alcoholic? An alcohol abuser? I don't know.

Chances are if you're here - You probably know the answer. :-)

How goes day two?
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