Horrible Mood Swings
 

I am almost at 90 days (for the second time around) and I am experiencing really bad mood swings. From anxious to depressed. Right now I am at work at I can't stop crying. I am lucky I have an office.

I need to think some happy thoughts, I guess. :a108:

Edit to say I am using AA as a my recovery tool.

put your finger above the bridge of your nose about 1 1/2 inches on your forehead and hit the "eject" button and release all the negativity into the white light of your HP. Or try asking yourself "do i want to be unstuck?" "when?" "NOW!"

Banannagirl, congratulations on 90 days sober!

Have you tried meditating? It can really help to keep the negative thoughts under control.

Journalling is also really good. Sometimes, by writing out the thoughts and feelings on a piece of paper, they lose their impact.

I have journaled today. I will try meditating at lunch.

I feel so stupid and weak.

You are neither stupid, nor weak.

Recovery from addiction is a really hard road and at times, it feels overwhelming. You are doing an amazing job!

Hang in there.
You can do this. We all know how hard this is!
Try taking a few deep breath or two and repeat. Meditation sounds good.
Exercise, pamper yourself, have a cup of tea. You deserve it.

Banana, I started getting back to journaling recently. I used to be prolific, and liked to write for as long as I can remember, and then it turned into a way of dealing with depression for me. It took a good 10 years or so for alcohol to supplant writing in that personal way. Then the desire to journal came back and I must have eyed a journal somebody gave to me about 15 years ago for two weeks before I could open it up and start going at it. But I did, like it was an instinct to stay healthy and symbolically stamp out some territory. At least it feels that way. I understand if it is only good to an extent though.

I don't think there is anything stupid or weak in what you said in the least. Having the ability to focus on "it" is a big DEAL to me. I am a bit past my 100 days now for the first time ever, so I am mindful of the ifs that will be there for me. I don't know what else to say other than to remember that you can do it today and then do it tomorrow again. You know your tools, you know this forum is here, you know what happened when Day One was there. All of that is strength you own and just have to keep.

BG,
You are WEEKS ahead of me! Be _Proud_ of yourself! You're walking an incredibly difficult road! Go easy on yourself. I am still getting thru just the physical separation from alcohol, I will get to where you are, the emotional separation, and undoubtedly, I will get to where you are now in terms of wild mood swings, please hang tough and get thru this so you can help me when I get there!
Best wishes!
..Mike

Nan this is compeltely normal about 90 days - it was for me I know.
You are not stupid or weak.

If you haven't read this link it's a good one
Post-Acute Withdrawal Syndrome (PAWS) — Why we don’t get better immediately) Digital Dharma

lean on us too :)
D

[QUOTE=Toronto68;2532438]Banana, I started getting back to journaling recently. I used to be prolific, and liked to write for as long as I can remember, and then it turned into a way of dealing with depression for me. It took a good 10 years or so for alcohol to supplant writing in that personal way. Then the desire to journal came back and I must have eyed a journal somebody gave to me about 15 years ago for two weeks before I could open it up and start going at it.

I have to say, I agree and relate to this feeling so well! I have yet to open that journal sitting on my shelf, but I used to consider myself somewhat of a writer and spent many hours in my past writing and creating. I, as well, have allowed all of that creativity to be buried and I'm so sad about that. I used to express through music as well and haven't picked up an instrument or sang in a very long time. I just don't have any inspiration these days....none at all.

Your post gives me the hope that i will find my creative spirit one day again and become the woman I am supposed to be.

I know exactly how you feel because I am going through the same thing myself. Sadly, I don't have any advice for you.

That was an excellent read and I've saved the link for later. Very enlightening. Thanks for posting that.