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Moving Forward, Leaving old habits in the dust!

Old 02-27-2010, 07:19 AM
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Moving Forward, Leaving old habits in the dust!

I thought it might be interesting and motivational to talk about what we do differently since we are newly sober and breaking old bad habits.

I used to come home from work and immediately pour a glass of wine as I did my "cat chores" household stuff, before I finished cleaning up I might finish 2-3 big glasses of wine....before i tried for dinner, too tired to cook of course, eating whatever I could scrounge from the freezer or fridge....continue drinking until sometimes 5-6AM as I could never sleep...I would drink 1.5 liters of wine minimum each night....i loved cabernet...(we figured it was about 1750-2,000 wine calories alone each DAY in addition to foods)....no wonder I packed on almost35-40 lbs....i was so dehydrated, my skin looked like crappola and my lips were always chapped...some days i just had a cup of coffee only and more winewine wine.

I purposely cultivate new habits...(I am on Sober Day 12 today, thankyouGod and SR)

I have substituted beautiful tasty, HEALTHY herbal teas each night to staisfy what I guess is a "sipping urge"....i use a oversized pretty glass cup and saucer, i cook myself something I have planned and set the table. i get more done by "keeping busy", even if it is just cleaning out a drawer or putting away clutter...i feel a sense of accomplishment...I feel more peaceful walking into a clean house too.

sorry to be so long-winded....looking forward to hearing from others too!
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Old 02-27-2010, 07:46 AM
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I wish i was as strong as you. Keep it up!!!!!
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Old 02-27-2010, 07:54 AM
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Gotta love those herbal teas! Here's to having a sober mind and body! I hope you can stick with it.
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Old 02-27-2010, 08:05 AM
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Fandy, thanks for the great topic and I too am looking forward to what others have to say.

Here are some of the changes I've made:

1) Make my bed - well, almost every day!
2) Pack lunch for work - and keep healthy snacks there.
3) Call a friend every day.
4) Pray.

I rarely did these things when I was drinking which now seems really weird to me but at the time was NORMAL. I entirely forgot that these are things that many people do as a matter of course every day ... and I used to do. It feels really great to be getting parts of my life back again.

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Old 02-27-2010, 08:17 AM
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One of the hardest things to change was cleaning the house. I connected housecleaning to drinking. I'd be drinking away whizzing through the house with the music on. It was yet another sick way of telling myself the drinking wasn't so bad. 'Cause, golly! look how well I clean!! ;-)

I had to break down the cleaning into 15-20 minute increments in the morning, afternoon, and evening.

That was a tricky one, glad I got past it. As there's no way to just break the habit of cleaning your house!
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Old 02-27-2010, 08:20 AM
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Dub, you CAN be strong, think of how happy your daughter would be to see you in a new healthy habit,( just one to show her, start small).

I make my bed now too....and I cut up fruit for breakfast so chomp on while i run around in the AM....we have a huge cafeteria at work complete with fresh sandwich selections, salad bar, 3 hot entrees, 2 soups each day for super cheap, so sometimes it is a better option to eat from there...but I must avoid the burgers, onion rings, fries, pizzas and frozen yogurt sundaes!....

I took out crabcakes for dinner tonight will make fingerling potatoes and a salad, and I have made a GROCERY LIST!!!

plus I made a "snack pack" for my mother at the nursing home...I am visiting her today..i no longer go empty-handed with just the newspaper, covering up my breath...I have raspberry cookies, a few boiled shrimp & cocktail sauce and made her some fresh ham/egg salad that i will put on toast....i am putting thought into a few of her treats i bring...I am thinking how would I like to be "trapped" in a place where I had no choice what to eat and no way to go out and get it???

I was a selfish drunk, i only thought of myself most of the time.
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Old 02-27-2010, 08:29 AM
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Today I have 21 days clean and sober after many false starts and stops. Old habits are hard to break. When I first got sober I kept my old habits. Not purposely but only because I didn't know what else to do! I would drink 2 pots of coffee in the morning and at noon another and after dinner another. Needless to say my body, now that I can hear it, objected strongly to this over indulence of caffiene. So I started to cut way back on the coffee and to try and eat right. Something I never gave 2 thoughts about when I was active. Today I eat high fiber cereals in the morning and lots of vegetables and fruits. Brown rice I find helps me with my daily regimen and I love the sweet taste of fresh vegetables. I stay away from salt as my BP tends to run high. It's quite amazing that I can do this. I used to eat nothing but garbage and the height of healthy eating was Chinese food. LOL Ocaisionally I order a pizza with some vegetable as a topping like eggplant. I had, over the past 59 years wrecked havoc with my body and today I try to make up for it. God grant me the strength to stay on this wonderful path I have found, to keep up my new habits and to find recovery like I found my alcohol/drugs. God bless you guys!
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Old 02-27-2010, 08:34 AM
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My new habit is going to bed by 10:30 PM. It was not a hard habit to form, since by that time of the night I am usually very tired. Some nights I am up until 11:30, but I rarely see midnight anymore. And as we all know, midnight sober is very different than midnight drunk!

I also love drinking tea before I go to bed... usually a chamomile-lemon blend, or a cinnamon tea. They both relax me, and help me to sleep through the night.

My other habit is spending Sunday cooking food for the week. I start Sunday mornings by planning what I want to eat, go to the grocery store to get the food, then start cooking away. I always have a tonne of leftovers, so I eat good meals during the week when I get home from work. Like you, I used to scrounge my cupboards and freezer for "whatever" (I think one night I convinced myself that a bag of microwave popcorn could suffice as a meal - it fell into the "vegetable" category on the food pyramid. Crazy!)
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Old 02-27-2010, 08:51 AM
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I hope to start back into an old habit (when i did not drink much i did it almost every day)...of morning exercise..it is done for the day, before it gets away from me, helps to keep my BP even and boosts my mood.

I still catch myself thinking about what i "used to do"...but it is getting easier to put the old habits out to pasture and bring in new fresh thoughts.
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Old 02-27-2010, 05:19 PM
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Bump...
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Old 02-27-2010, 08:36 PM
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(Glad you bumped......weekends are low traffic times here at SR.)

This is some excellent stuff, Fandy. When I think about my old routine I can hardly believe what I considered a normal day. I'd come home and start pounding down beers - just to "face" the housework, dog feeding, getting clothes ready for next day. How ridiculous. If anyone called or came to the door, I'd be so resentful. How dare they bother me while I was busy getting trashed?

I, too, rarely slept. I'd have a drink by my bedside for when I woke up with the shakes. When morning came, I was already half in the bag (disgusting). I looked awful, too, dry hair that was falling out - pasty white skin, red eyes & very bloated. Yummy.

I thought I kept things clean, but as the fog lifted I noticed so many half-assed things I did. Nothing was really organized or orderly. Just before I quit it was utter chaos. I was wearing the same outfits over & over so I wouldn't have to iron. I could never stand to go back to those days. To think it was a way of life for over 25 yrs.

I'd like to say I have all healthy new habits, but not yet. I need to work on it - thanks for the inspiration! I ate so much candy in the beginning, and that's stopped. Now I have a coffee, diet cola, and ice cream addiction to get rid of. *sigh* Always something.
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Old 02-27-2010, 09:46 PM
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Wow this is a great thread so far, I usually only post in the Substance abuse area but since I am still a newby (2 months this tues) I might wander through these forums as well. I still don't sleep as well as I would like, even 2 months out from kicking a bad pill habit. But what was amazing is the things I start to notice that I never use to. Sort of like seeing in color after a long time of black and white.
Last week I walked out my back door to go to work and I actually paused on the steps and listened to birds, a very minute detail I would have never noticed in my usual drug induced hyperactive mind. One foot in front of the other all the way to work that day, feeling very blessed to be sober.
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Old 02-28-2010, 05:33 AM
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another new habit I've developed seems to be going to bed earlier and waking earlier, (which is very useful for being on time for work and getting some exercise before work which is my best time)....i am no longer in bed until Noon. I'm up enjoying my coffee and Sunday TV.
...In the past I was always a "morning person", perhaps that will be true again. I sure do get more time to do real normal *STUFF* like shopping and cleaning up. i am making progress on the house every week and i applaud my little accomplishments like organizing the untensil drawer in the kitchen.

Heavn, i was wearing clothes out of the dryer as i washed them too....same thing almost every day....now my other clothes are fitting...and i feel like I have new sweaters (for free)!

another new habit I have is flavored herbal teas, now that I actually go grocery shopping i've found Blueberry, Lemon, Tangerine and Red Zingers....all caffeine free, all delicous...and I bought Stevia sweetner which is sweeter than splenda...i have more sugar cravings due to withdrawal I guess...but i am still losing weight and I allow myself chocolate and a few cookies every day with the tea.

I now eat breakfast everyday, fruit mostly....I hadn't been able to do this the last 2 months i was drinking....(i told myself that wine counted as fruit...)
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Old 02-28-2010, 06:55 AM
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I don't know if this habit is considered *healthy*, but a little smear of Nutella on slices of granny smith apples sure is good! Fruit and chocolate/hazelnut for breakfast? why not.....

i could do worse, much worse....thought I would share my discovery.:ghug3
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Old 02-28-2010, 11:43 AM
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I wish i was as strong as you.
You CAN be that strong. Just do it!! No more 'wishes', just action.
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Old 02-28-2010, 12:34 PM
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Thera, I hang out in newbies every day - even though I'm over 2 yrs. sober. There's alot of activity here, plus I get to welcome some of the newcomers, which means so much to me. I like what you said about seeing things in color now vs black & white (and foggy too).

Fandy, you just reminded me of something. I was a morning person too. During my drinking career, very little remained of the real me from years ago - but now I'm getting up earlier too - & appreciating not having that soul-destroying feeling of remorse and dread. I am now reading again. It was years since I was able to concentrate on a book. I'd read a few pages & not retain anything. Same for movies I tried to watch. So sad - we thought we were living. We were just going through the motions.
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Old 02-28-2010, 01:38 PM
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I amazed myself today.....OK I would have LIKED to sleep a little longer on a Sunday, (damn cats wouldn't allow it~WHY do they Biotch-slap each other in bed)? but i got more done before 10AM today then I did in a WEEK when I was drinking heavy! I am talking vacuuming, washing, folding, empty the dishwasher....mundane chores but they are DONE.

now i can leave work, go home and relax..all I have to do is make oven roasted veggies and put my crabcakes in the oven for a REAL dinner! no Sunday night anxiety before tomorrow either...(I have 2 new groups of students beginning Surgery in the AM.)
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Old 02-28-2010, 01:51 PM
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This was and is a GREAT thread.

Old: Pour wine around 4 PM and drink until lights out. Obsess all day about how I couldn't wait until 4 PM. Skip events outside of house in favor of staying in and drinking. Shut myself in the bedroom while watching no minded tv and drink.

New: Cup of coffee mid-afternoon. Go over homework with son. Watch some tv with son. Prepare dinner and eat dinner with son. (Husband comes home late and eats when he gets home). Read to son. Son goes to bed and I read or play on computer. If there's a school event I not only go I usually volunteer. We have after school things we are involved in too, such as cub scouts.

I actually am living life instead of existing and being a slave to the 4 O'Clock hour or rather that first drink of the evening. I am a Mom, a Wife, and a caring individual.

Husband and son went away last night together and I was left for the night by myself. I loved it and not once did I think of getting trashed, which is what I normally would have done. I watched Lifetime tv and haven't watched that in years and had some shrimp and cocktail sauce just for me. Soda was the beverage of choice.

Need to do some work on that diet and exercise thing at some point, but I eat "pretty" good. I, like Hevyn, like my icecream for sure! I also like popcorn A LOT!
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Old 02-28-2010, 06:07 PM
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I came home from work today, after stopping at Petsmart and buying mass quantities of kitty supplies...after carrying 80 lbs. of litter and dragging everything else in the house, the "old me" says "Time for a Drink/reward"....

I screamed/groaned, stomped around the house like a 2 year old for a few minutes, then my hissy-fit was over....made a cup of tea and took some of my vitamins and reflected on how NOT to backslide.
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Old 02-28-2010, 07:39 PM
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Originally Posted by Fandy View Post
Bump...
Great thread - but I give...what is a bump???

Re: new habits...I began getting things organized on Sundays too -preparing healthy meals for the week, filling the car up with gas, organizing clothes for work - all the stuff that I used to just *react* to.

Feels good.

Bump?
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