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I'm kind of glad I relapsed ...if that makes any sense. My relapse came after 48 days of sobriety and I truly hit rock bottom. My children could have been taken from me. I could have lost my job. I am lucky. I still have both. I have eight days now and I am feeling good and strong. Somehow, somewhere along the line, through all those meetings, all my discussions with the folks here on SR, support from my friends and family...IT JUST CLICKED. Sobriety doesn't scare me anymore. I am embracing it. I know that things will never have to get as bad as they did before because I am now armed with the tools to prevent it. I have accepted my disease and have gained control (and hopefully will continue to gain even more control as I progress in my sobriety.) I was doing the most random thing the other night - filling the pellet stove in my house - and the thought just hit me like a ton of bricks, "I never have to drink again." I felt like doing a little happy dance, LOL. Just wanted to share, and thank you for the part you have played in my sobriety. The support here is incredible and I am very grateful. |
Glad things are finally clicking for you. Hope it works out for you better this time. Take care. |
http://i273.photobucket.com/albums/j...idaydance4.gif Congratulations on hitting your bottom! You know, if you stop & think, Recovery is the only place where you are happy that someone has finally felt the worst that they hopefully will ever have to feel in their life. But you have to hit that bottom before you can begin to climb back up to where you can finally begin to live your life. Oh, Snoopy's doing that happy dance for you. God Bless, Judy |
Glad to hear you're feeling stronger LMW :) D |
Very happy for you :) I was also so released when I realised "Hey, I really don't have to drink". Every situation I could imagine myself in, being sober and being under the influence, looks SO much better sober. So I stopped making excuses for my drinking, after all "If we defend our habits, we have no intentions of quitting them" Good luck in staying sober for yours & your children's sake :) |
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