Ghostman

Hi, I came on one time recently,
I mostly was starting to notice a problem with alcohol..
I started getting a bit worse with alcohol and my prescription meds..
I guess I had been a bit down lately with things..
I let them get to me, and I think it is leading to addictive behavior..
I don't like to ask anyone for help tho, that isn't normal for me.

Fubarcdn

Good to see you posting Ghostman.
You can always come here and post if you are down or feeling anything else for that matter.
We will try to cheer you up by lending an ear and doling out a little encouragement and we are happy to do it as it helps us too.
I found that when I gave up the alcohol after a month or so my moods actually got 100% better and I would venture to guess that you will find the same thing.
Good luck and keep posting.

Ghostman

Yes, I remember your quote about positivity, from last time I was on here..
That is great, cause I always have believed in positive thinking..
It is good timing too, I need positive energy, maybe thats why I came back here..
Thanks for that post and your support.

intention

Hi Ghostman, good to see you posting again.

Have you considered going to AA?

Ghostman

Hey good to see you again too..
That had crossed my mind..
The reasone I didn't do it tho, is cause I didn't want to quit drinking beer completely..
Recently has been the first time I thought it may be a problem..

But latetly I had been messing around with a lot of prescriptions too..
The thing about me is I am always positive and don't get down like this..
just recently has been a bit different, lot of things going on..
I am letting them get to me I guess.. its not good..

intention

This is a very common pattern with addiction. Unfortunately, without treatment, it just gets progressively worse.

Ananda

Ghost...feel free to continue posting and lurk around some of the threads too...alot of us are totally out of control by the time we realize there is a problem, but when we look back at our drinking it becomes clear the problem started way before we realized it.

For me alchoholism is disease of perseption...one way it manifests itself is in the mind....that sounds like perhaps what you are describing.

My mind simply lied to me...twisted facts and cercumstances to meet my wants....or sometimes just my preconceptions that were negative in nature.

I struggled some with the definition of alchohoic, because I never decided to not drink and then drank ....that i could see.... After coming to AA at age 28, and returning to drinking neumorous times it became clear that was partly an age and environment thing....We always partied whenever it was available and control was never considered an option lol....thus i hadn't expreinced trying to quit and being unable to

Anyhow...crusing the threads and possibly trying an AA meeting or Smart or some other program...might give you an opportunity to explore your questions and come to a conclusion...just keep in mind that our mind will naturally try to lie to us about our ilness....so look closely

HumbleBee

I know I certainly drank to escape. It 'seemed' better to just get so out of it that the problems would disappear.

Of course, that only happens until I woke up, still had the same problems along with massive hangovers and self-loathing.

Like you, I had a very hard time asking for help. I thought it was a sign of weakness (I can handle it, yeah right). I found that asking for help is a sign of strength - to reach out, share our experience and receive feedback and support from those who know exactly how we feel...it was the best thing I ever did.

Maybe stop and ask yourself what things are so different that's making you feel less positive?

And by all means, keep posting and sharing - no doubt many of us have been there.

NEOMARXIST

Hey man. I agree with HumbleBee in that actually asking for help and admitting ones alcoholism is way more strong than just burying your head in the sand and coninuing to drink/drug yourself down lower and lower. Thats easy; any alkie can do that and consequently they do!

It takes courage to ask for help and to recognise and act upon one's problem.

CoF1984

Ghost, glad to see your post on here. Keep coming back and reading and try to keep with as much positive vibes as you can. Maybe try drinking a ton of water and a little healthy eating or so, it may help to feel a little better and clear your head some. Just an idea. Hope to continue to see you around.

Wes

Dee74

Welcome back Ghostman

I never asked for help either...things began to get on top of me, I lost my positive edge and then I lost myself....self medication led me down a very dark...and long road.

Have you considered seeing a doctor?
D

least

Asking for help is a sign of strength, to admit you can't do it alone. We are here to support you and help you in your recovery.

floridadetox

Hi Ghostman. First, I want to welcome you and thank you for sharing. I can understand you not being comfortable with asking for help. That is not an uncommon thing. Perhaps you can just share more things like this. I find that when I'm down, sometimes it's helpful just to share - even if no one immediately responds on the other end. It can help us to think through the issues we're having, and that thinking period gives us time to work through them and find alternate solutions or gain insight from others that can lead to better solutions.

It might also be helpful to journal your thoughts about what you're going through, either privately or publicly. Perhaps a regular blog or a video blog would be a good medium for sharing also.

Please feel free to come back any time if you wish to share what's been getting you down. We're more than happy to offer a little perspective any time.

- Dennis Hansen

Ghostman

Hey, thanks I like that.
I still dont even know where it started getting a problem..
It never used to be a problem..
but anyways, I am trying to be honest with myself like you said.
It has led to other problems, lately its the first time in a long time I started feeling depressed..
that isnt like me.. I am glad I came back here.

Ghostman

Hey, thanks.
I found what you wrote very interesting..
I sometimes feel like I am heading down a path of darkness,
thats what worries me.
A doctor? That hadnt crossed my mind at all really.

Ghostman

Hey thanks!
Yes, I don't like to ask for help, that isnt me.

Dee74

I think thats the cry of 99% of us, ghostman.
It's an insidious process...death of a thousand sips.

D

Ghostman

Yes! I know EXACTLY what you mean.
I feel it is showing weekness or something, thats what stops me from talking about it.
And as far as feeling less positive, that is probably to do with my habits getting worse and my life circumstances bothering me more than they should.
I didn't used to be bothered by little things as much as I have lately.

Ghostman

Thanks D.. I like your take on things.