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sundays can be tough...

Old 01-10-2010, 06:40 AM
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sundays can be tough...

i love my red wine while i make sunday dinner. i wish that that was all and the only time that i drank. i won't drink today, but i wondered if anyone had advice on how to make that time, where it became such an ingrained habit, a little easier? and, i've been a bit down the last few days. yesterday wasn't so bad, but today, like friday, i feel kind of down. stuck in nostalgia land (and its not just about my favorite drink... oh, they're all my favorite, but its not so much that!) i guess i keep telling myself its part of the process... thanks for listening.

gg
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Old 01-10-2010, 06:56 AM
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Hi GG. I was stuck in nostalgia land many times in the first few months. Back then I looked at quitting as giving something up, not gaining something. I was so sorry for myself and resentful. Those feelings do pass & you won't be stuck there forever, I promise.

This is a very good question you're asking - about the old habits being hard to break. Alcohol was my constant companion in the end, & when we broke up it was like getting over a bad love affair. I hope others will have suggestions on how to stomp out those thoughts you're having. I just kept going until the bad feelings faded into nothing, but I'm sure there are things you could do to change your routine & avoid triggers.

Sorry to hear you've been having a rough go of it lately. It is part of the process, as you said, and it does ease up. Every day brings you closer to the happy, healthy life you want for yourself. Even if you aren't aware of the progress, it's there. I'm glad you came here to talk about your feelings.
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Old 01-10-2010, 07:08 AM
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thank you so much hevyn. it is such a blessing to have the support, and the understanding.

gg
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Old 01-10-2010, 07:52 AM
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Just a suggestion but if you can fit it in your budget why not go to a restaurant for dinner today. You deserve it.
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Old 01-10-2010, 07:58 AM
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It sounds like your Sunday dinner is a trigger.

Fubarcdn had a great suggestion, if your funds permit, make a new habit of treating yourself to a meal somewhere.

If your funds don't permit, invite a friend/relative over for dinner to keep you company.

Perhaps volunteer at a Food Bank to put your craving in perspective.

I never realized how much triggers affected me until I cut them out of my life - not drinking has never been easier in all the times I've tried to quit before.
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Old 01-10-2010, 08:01 AM
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going out to dinner is a great suggestion, but my funds are a bit low today, and its around one degree F here, with a lot of snow to sludge through... so i won't be going anywhere but, that means i won't be going to get any alcohol today, either. i think when i have the funds, i will treat my daughter and myself to sunday dinner somewhere else, though.
thank you for the suggestion.
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Old 01-17-2010, 08:02 PM
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First of all, congrats for getting thru the weekend! Here is what I have been doing to combat my wine cravings esp in the evening while I fix dinner for my son and me. I have bought several types of juices, as well as La Croix sparkling water and I have been making yummy juice spritzers for us. I recognize those symptoms from HALT a lot too, and hugging my kiddo or stepping outside with the dogs to see the sky and breathe helps the hard moment pass.

Just remember where that one glass of wine used to lead...and how crappy you felt the next morning, and compare that with waking up now. Isn't it great to wake up clear headed! Woo hoo!
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Old 01-17-2010, 09:37 PM
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Substitutes

Originally Posted by ghostgirl View Post
i love my red wine while i make sunday dinner. i wish that that was all and the only time that i drank. i won't drink today, but i wondered if anyone had advice on how to make that time, where it became such an ingrained habit, a little easier?

Get a substitute while you break the alcohol habit. I found that if I had something that resembled what others were drinking around my kitchen I would be mostly fine. Have sparkling water but in a rocks glass with lemon. Dark fruit juice cut with water in a wine glass. My favorite: cranberry juice and tonic with a lime and dash of bitters. Just like real drinking going on! You know, minus the alcohol part.

Search for "mocktails" or "non-alcoholic cocktails" for some surprising substitutes.
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Old 01-17-2010, 10:04 PM
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Originally Posted by Untoxicated View Post

I never realized how much triggers affected me until I cut them out of my life - not drinking has never been easier in all the times I've tried to quit before.
Truer words were never spoken...when I'm away from the old haunts, it doesn't bother me at all not to drink. I never really did it at home...always out with friends. But last week, when we just went to visit our friends, and I saw their car, I immediately had a craving. Their CAR for god sakes. Oh the brain is strange, indeed.
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Old 01-18-2010, 08:09 AM
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hi guys! thank you for those suggestions; that is exactly what i have been doing to help me out, and the sparkling water with lime is soooo refreshing!! i have a special little cordial glass that my beautiful daughter gave me as a christmas gift (i don't think she knew it was a glass for an alcoholic beverage; she just knew it was pretty ), and i use it to drink cranberry juice out of.

someone suggested that i go out for dinner to avoid my trigger, but i really wanted to work through the trigger (making sunday dinner) without the alcohol, because that is what i want to be able to do: make a nice, slow cooked sunday dinner without the alcohol. and so now i've gone through three sundays without the alcohol!! yeah!

thanks again, guys.

gg
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Old 01-18-2010, 08:30 AM
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It's good to see you again, GG.
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Old 01-18-2010, 08:36 AM
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Hi ghostgirl!

YaY you for making it through the weekend! I, too, used to cook and drink, especially on Sundays. I do what others have suggested and have a fancy alternative beverage. I like La Croix orange flavored sparkling water.

It took me a while to not miss drinking while cooking until I realized that the finished product was way better when I cook it sober. What used to happen when I was drinking is that I would sometimes not follow the directions, be too tipsy to make something come out right or just plain mess it up.

Now I follow the directions precisely and it almost always comes out right. Focus on your love of cooking and you will find a new way to enjoy it. Sober!
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Old 01-18-2010, 09:20 AM
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Hey GG
so relate 2 your post
Wine and cooking - go together and part of my "wind down zone out time"
Great advice from others that I will also be trying to follow. Changing the "routine" of what you cook and when you cook on a Sunday could also help reduce the trigger.
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