Want to try again.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 232
Want to try again.
I'm back and I'm sure im not alone today wanting to try again at sobriety. My last attempt gave me 33 days. Then I started feelking better...feeling stronger and healthier and had more energy.
This made me want to drink because it gave me a false sence of security. The addict in me somehow had me thinking that I really wasnt that bad and maybe I can handle it....sound familiar?
I fell off that wagon and began drinking more frequently and harder.
I just dont know how to break this ugly cycle. I know Im an alcoholic, I know I have to stop drinking.
Guess im here to try it yet again. Im back and for those of you who remember me from a few months ago, missed you and my sobriety
Carrie
This made me want to drink because it gave me a false sence of security. The addict in me somehow had me thinking that I really wasnt that bad and maybe I can handle it....sound familiar?
I fell off that wagon and began drinking more frequently and harder.
I just dont know how to break this ugly cycle. I know Im an alcoholic, I know I have to stop drinking.
Guess im here to try it yet again. Im back and for those of you who remember me from a few months ago, missed you and my sobriety
Carrie
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,428
Welcome back Carrie
It's certainly familiar to me - eventually I thought I was 'wasn't that bad' so many times, and found out I was....I just accepted what I was.
checking in here regularly - reading, posting, and re-reading my early posts - all helped me break the cycle too
D
It's certainly familiar to me - eventually I thought I was 'wasn't that bad' so many times, and found out I was....I just accepted what I was.
checking in here regularly - reading, posting, and re-reading my early posts - all helped me break the cycle too
D
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
Hi Carrie,
I went through that same cycles for years. I'd hang on tight and try my best to not drink. Talked to my doctor, went to a counselor, did outpatient treatment, inpatient rehab, went to AA meetings. I'd put together a few weeks or a few months of not drinking, and then for some insanely trivial reason (like being bored or anxious), I'd start drinking again.
Finally it was pointed out to me in AA's Big Book that I was not the first person to be in that cycle. The book spoke of countless vain attempts to control our drinking. It spoke of always making a resolution, but never a decision, not to drink. Because a decision requires action.
The actions were laid out for me precisely in the first 164 pages of that book. I took those actions as best I could at the time, and I recovered.
I stay in those actions in my daily life, and I've never had to worry about alcohol since then.
I went through that same cycles for years. I'd hang on tight and try my best to not drink. Talked to my doctor, went to a counselor, did outpatient treatment, inpatient rehab, went to AA meetings. I'd put together a few weeks or a few months of not drinking, and then for some insanely trivial reason (like being bored or anxious), I'd start drinking again.
Finally it was pointed out to me in AA's Big Book that I was not the first person to be in that cycle. The book spoke of countless vain attempts to control our drinking. It spoke of always making a resolution, but never a decision, not to drink. Because a decision requires action.
The actions were laid out for me precisely in the first 164 pages of that book. I took those actions as best I could at the time, and I recovered.
I stay in those actions in my daily life, and I've never had to worry about alcohol since then.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 128
Originally Posted by Carrie36 
I fell off that wagon and began drinking more frequently and harder...I just dont know how to break this ugly cycle.
Carrie
Carrie
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,560
Hi Carrie. I don't know why we procrastinate, knowing what has to be done. I knew many years ago I couldn't drink, but kept trying to control it. Playing with fire that way caused so much damage to my life and health.
When I found SR I started to see the light, knowing everyone else had been down the same road I was on. They made it, and I knew I could too. We'll be here to help in any way we can. Congratulations on your decision, a whole new world awaits you.
When I found SR I started to see the light, knowing everyone else had been down the same road I was on. They made it, and I knew I could too. We'll be here to help in any way we can. Congratulations on your decision, a whole new world awaits you.
Living in the moment!
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Wondering where I belong!
Posts: 126
Hi Carrie,
I am in the exact same place with wanting sobriety, I've been through many different types of treatment.....only to fail again! The longest I have to date is 6 mths.....I am so sick of the drinking, the binging, the headaches, the hiding etc.....
I have started repairing my relationship with God, I can NOT do this alone! I hope I can find some encouragement with SR....I have read some very strong sobriety here. Something I want today!!
I am in the exact same place with wanting sobriety, I've been through many different types of treatment.....only to fail again! The longest I have to date is 6 mths.....I am so sick of the drinking, the binging, the headaches, the hiding etc.....
I have started repairing my relationship with God, I can NOT do this alone! I hope I can find some encouragement with SR....I have read some very strong sobriety here. Something I want today!!
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