lostmyway

I am. I don't want to drink, and I won't. But I think I'm mourning the loss of my old way of life, and having a little trouble settling into a new routine. The Librium that my doctor prescribed to me is helping, but the effect seems weaker than it was during the first couple of days I took it. Sometimes I almost feel a little manic, like I am trying to take on too much this early in my sobriety. The Librium also affects my balance - I'm always tripping and falling over - people probably still think I'm drinking and I'm not, LOL. I am wanting to make it to an AA meeting tonight, but I'm not sure when my husband will be home, so I may not have anyone to watch the kids. Still, I'm on day six and that is good. How is everyone else feeling this evening?

Anna

Hi,

I think it takes a lot of work to get through the unsettling days of early sobriety. I had to push myself to change routines and do different things. Maybe you could talk to your dr aqbout t6he librium and the side effects.

I'm glad you're doing alright.

Astro

I'm feeling very good today lost, thank you for asking. Can you take your kids to the AA meeting? My kids went with me for years but I'm not sure how open your meetings are or if you're comfortable with taking them.

Congrats on day 6, I remember the first couple weeks being very difficult, but I went to a meeting almost every day. The folks at those meetings taught me that picking up again would be a personal choice. I never had to drink again, and I wouldn't die if I didn't drink again. And they loved me when I couldn't love myself.

I'm glad you're here sharing and hope it helps to keep your mind off drinking.

Horselover

(((Lost))) The beginning days were very emotional for me too. There is a bit of a mourning period for sure, but I am glad you are going to go to AA. Get some numbers and find out if they have childcare there. Do you have anyone you can call to watch the kids during the gap that it takes for your husband to get home? Wish I was closer. I would have you drop them off with me. Let us know how it goes and how you are doing.

sara19

i feel like dying.... this is horrible for me, i can be overemotional and melodramatic to begin with... this isnt helping... this is one of my days off work, i should be drunk right now

least

I'm feeling like sh!t myself tonight and it's my own damn fault. I wouldn't be on day seven if I hadn't screwed up eight days ago. I'm lonely and don't want to go anywhere or do anything. Early sobriety is rough tho, and I know that. But knowing it doesn't make it easier to deal with.

I hope you can get to a meeting tonght. (((hugs)))

Astro

How about just posting here Sara until those feelings pass or until you feel a little better? Do you have someone you can call? You don't need to drink, that's the disease lying to you.

SomethingBetter

I am not doing well at all tonight, I feel like I need a drink so badly, I can imagine taste it on my tongue, I have had a pretty bad day so far and have been tired since I quit 9 days ago. It does suck but I know if I drink tonight the cravings will just be back tomorrow not to mention the hangover.

The feeling is like a hunger, I am even shaking a little and I’m very irritable, I know after I eat dinner it will help a lot but just got in and it’s not ready yet.

Just needed to tell that to someone, I won’t drink tonight, its 8PM, dinner, shower bed…

Hang in there everyone! Bring on day 10…

coffeenut

Early sobriety can be rough at times. But, long term sobriety is so worth it. Stick close to SR....read and post all you can. Welcome to SR.

Mariposa18

Early sobriety is hard Sweetie, but trust me when I say it's worth it. SR was a life saver for me, still is. When I feel antsy or unsettled I come here and read a lot, I may not post but I read until the feeling passes. It was hard for me to concentrate on books when I first got sober but if that's possible for you I'd pick one up. I see you have Kids, maybe playing a board game or doing something as simple as coloring. Believe it or not coloring books can be great therapy!

Stick around and next thing you know the days will get easier, you'll learn new coping skills and you'll feel much better. It's hard to change your life, but it's possible and very worth it for you and your Babies~

barb dwyer

*sending prayers of serenity, beauty and peace*

I'm personally wound tighter n' a five gallon bag in a ten gallon bucket.

But I've been around long enough now to know that this too will pass.
When I stop and think of all the times
I was cared for,
looked over,
and guarded/protected
by Something Too Big To Understand....

I calm down.

And you will too, I promise
as time passes
and we build up the sober life experiences
to rely on ....
and the beauty of SR is that others are here,

and none of us... are alone.

we're gonna be fine.

lostmyway

Wow, these were great posts. Thank you all for sharing. Horselover, you are so kind, and I sure do wish you lived closer...my kids would probably have a great time hanging out with you for awhile!

sara19...your post broke my heart. Hang in there, girl - pray, go to a meeting, talk to someone - do whatever you need to do to not pick up that first drink. I am so new to sobriety, but I know that we can overcome this.

As for me, I made it to the meeting and met a warm, friendly, great bunch of people.

I hope that everyone who is struggling has a good night and an even better tomorrow.

Phan

Today is only day five for me, but am feeling rather optimistic. I too have been antsy particularly at night, probably because I'm used to being under the influence by now. I haven't been getting much sleep and when I wake-up, my hands are usually trembling until mid morning. I have urges throughout the day which I know is normal. I'm not saying that I embrace these urges as they are generally unpleasant, but I also realize that these thoughts will fade with time. I try to mentally challenge these thoughts by recognizing the costs and benefits to submitting to these urges. So far, I haven't come up with any benefits. By the way, these posts are extremely encouraging. Thanks to all.

Astro

Always love it when someone has a positive experience with a meeting. I'm glad you made it.

sara19

i dont pray, cause i dont think anyone is listening.. i dont go to meeting, i think they're a waste of time, and i dont have anyone to talk to... what i like to do to get me through the day is drink and get high

Astro

Sara, I learned that someone is always listening when I pray and they always answer.

Sometimes the answer is yes.

Sometimes the answer is no.

Most of the time the answer is let me show you something better.

Drinking and using never answered or solved any of my problems. And while I won't comment on meetings being a waste of time, there's always someone to talk to when I go to one so I find them very helpful.

NEOMARXIST

Go drink and get high then!! Who's stopping you. Sounds like you ain't willing to give anything else a chance so you may as well go drink and get high.

If you really want to quit drink/drugs then get your a*rse to an AA meeting. Don't cost a penny and if you want it bad enough and do what is suggested to you then it really works too. It has saved 1000's people 1000x worse than you I'm sure. Are you out on the street yet sleeping under a bridge? I know poeple who ain't touched a drop for 25 years who were doing just that who I take wisdom from when i phone them up and talk to them at AA meetings which are free and full of alcoholics who were much worse than I was and living decent sober lives with peace of mind.

jgull2010

You don't need to pray if you don't want to, you just need to get out of your own head for awhile. Your alcoholic Beast is raging about right now striving to get you to use again. Try just listening to some quiet music, read a book, take a walk. Meditation of any kind is good. Even 12 step meetings can be very useful because there are a lot of people just like you in them. They are only a waste of time if you are in the mood to waste time. If you don't have anyone to physically talk to then just post here...that is a good start.

Don't just sit there, do something!

It is ironic that we certainly can get drunk all alone but to get and stay sober, we usually need other people. If I stay in my own head and try to battle my addictive self all by myself, I always lose. Fighting It just feeds it.

J.

stephnc

It gets better, especially after the first few weeks. Hang in there, go to as many meetings as you can stand, and keep posting here.

I'd definitely check with your doctor about your meds.

Sending good thoughts your way...

lostmyway

Sorry, sara19...you sound like you're really down and I was only trying to help, but it's okay...keep doing it your way and let us know how it works out.