NEW-Scared and ashamed to admit i have a problem
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: san diego, california
Posts: 5
NEW-Scared and ashamed to admit i have a problem
So, i've worked in a bar now since i was 21, i just turned 34. I havnt really considered it a problem since everyone around me drinks, that's what seems to always be done any social setting my friends are in.
My girlfriend 0f 7 years just moved out 2 months ago and ive been on quite a bender,ive been drinking out of lonliness and anxiety at night, and it starts off with a bottle of wine to sleep and if i'm still up, i'll walk to the store to get another. She works with me so seeing her 3 nights a week at work doesnt help to make it better, last night i saw her at work, i had a few drinks and proceded to text her the whole cab ride home like a weirdo, came home and drank a bottle of wine, woke up this morning with so much guilt and anxiety that i drank another bottle at 9am and went back to bed.
I'm realizing i have to stop, and can't do this to myself anymore. I looked up a AA meeting tomorrow afternoon, i just feel so down on myself realizing i cant just have a few drinks and stop. Finding this site has made me feel like i'm not alone and there are others in the same situation. JUst writing this makes me feel better, So thank you and wish me luck
My girlfriend 0f 7 years just moved out 2 months ago and ive been on quite a bender,ive been drinking out of lonliness and anxiety at night, and it starts off with a bottle of wine to sleep and if i'm still up, i'll walk to the store to get another. She works with me so seeing her 3 nights a week at work doesnt help to make it better, last night i saw her at work, i had a few drinks and proceded to text her the whole cab ride home like a weirdo, came home and drank a bottle of wine, woke up this morning with so much guilt and anxiety that i drank another bottle at 9am and went back to bed.
I'm realizing i have to stop, and can't do this to myself anymore. I looked up a AA meeting tomorrow afternoon, i just feel so down on myself realizing i cant just have a few drinks and stop. Finding this site has made me feel like i'm not alone and there are others in the same situation. JUst writing this makes me feel better, So thank you and wish me luck
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 8,326
TMC, welcome! You aren't alone! You'll find lots of support here and great information. If you haven't already, read the stickies. Lots of good stuff.
I'm here to tell you drinking doesn't work well as a sleep aid. I did that for years, just to make sure. LOL It made me more anxious and just added layers of guilt and bad feelings.
If you can, check out an AA meeting.
Love,
Lenina
I'm here to tell you drinking doesn't work well as a sleep aid. I did that for years, just to make sure. LOL It made me more anxious and just added layers of guilt and bad feelings.
If you can, check out an AA meeting.
Love,
Lenina
Owner of a strange glitch.
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: midsouth
Posts: 2,331
Welcome to SR 
Being new is scary... I was new here recently. I also was new to AA, and, boy was that scary. But I got inside, and so can you... just remember there are better days ahead.
Yeah, my first post I realized writing things makes it somehow better...
Take care,
TB, wishing you luck
Being new is scary... I was new here recently. I also was new to AA, and, boy was that scary. But I got inside, and so can you... just remember there are better days ahead.
Yeah, my first post I realized writing things makes it somehow better...
Take care,
TB, wishing you luck
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: san diego, california
Posts: 5
Thanks for the words of encouragement this is the hardest time of the night when my mind is racing and i'm alone in this house that i bought with the plans of us living here together, browsing this site will get me through the times i would usually crack open the bottle of wine, so once again, thanks
Grateful to be free
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 3,680
When you go to your first 12 step meeting, let them know it's your first time and they will give you a list of phone numbers to call at just those moments when you are tempted to go back to drinking.
those phone numbers themselves are invitations to call
use them....
those phone numbers themselves are invitations to call
use them....
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,243
Welcome TMC!!
You are not alone my friend. You have some very wonderful pluses going for you right now. First you have acknowledged that you have a problem, and secondly you are open to help!!! Took me a long long time to get to that point. Please stay in touch and let us know how you are doing.
You are not alone my friend. You have some very wonderful pluses going for you right now. First you have acknowledged that you have a problem, and secondly you are open to help!!! Took me a long long time to get to that point. Please stay in touch and let us know how you are doing.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Europe
Posts: 96
Hello TMC1
Stick around. This place is really great and you'll find a lot of genuine support here. I know exactly how hard it is to be a newcomer, I was one 3 months ago.
Don't let yourself stay in that situation. I know it must be hard with the x girlfriend and all, but really, you don't need her back at the moment. You might think you need her back but what you really need is to get sober. Go to an AA meeting. It's scary but once you did it you'll feel so much better and you'll feel a new kind of hope. I know I did and it was great
Plaease, don't be disparaged and know that there's light at the end of the tunnel
All the best.
Stick around. This place is really great and you'll find a lot of genuine support here. I know exactly how hard it is to be a newcomer, I was one 3 months ago.
Don't let yourself stay in that situation. I know it must be hard with the x girlfriend and all, but really, you don't need her back at the moment. You might think you need her back but what you really need is to get sober. Go to an AA meeting. It's scary but once you did it you'll feel so much better and you'll feel a new kind of hope. I know I did and it was great
Plaease, don't be disparaged and know that there's light at the end of the tunnel
All the best.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 159
Hi and welcome TMC-
Almost a month ago I was in the same place - the pain of a failed relationship and the shame of drinking.
It was really scary to go to the first AA meeting, but I was so glad I did. I hope you make it and get some phone numbers. You don't have to feel like this ever again.
Almost a month ago I was in the same place - the pain of a failed relationship and the shame of drinking.
It was really scary to go to the first AA meeting, but I was so glad I did. I hope you make it and get some phone numbers. You don't have to feel like this ever again.
Being Me for the first time
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Wishek, North Dakota
Posts: 1,160
Hey Hey TMC .. welcome to the best group of people your ever gonna meet ..
I can understand your share , Ive been in the bar/rest business since i was 14 Ive cook . bartended . managed . waited .. and even ran my moms bar/resturaunt for 5 yrs.
Today Im 6 yrs sober . Im not currently in the same business but Its always something I can fall back on if Im in need of a job . For me being around places that serve booze hasnt been an issue for me . Matter fact seeing those drinkin and being what I used to be , helps me realize exactly why I dont drink anymores . But I wouldnt suggest to anyone they test there soberity in doing a job that serves drinks , Its very risky ,
But anyways were glad your here and check out the fourms . there is a chat room full of great people come on in and introduce your self .. were glad your here ~ endzy ~
I can understand your share , Ive been in the bar/rest business since i was 14 Ive cook . bartended . managed . waited .. and even ran my moms bar/resturaunt for 5 yrs.
Today Im 6 yrs sober . Im not currently in the same business but Its always something I can fall back on if Im in need of a job . For me being around places that serve booze hasnt been an issue for me . Matter fact seeing those drinkin and being what I used to be , helps me realize exactly why I dont drink anymores . But I wouldnt suggest to anyone they test there soberity in doing a job that serves drinks , Its very risky ,
But anyways were glad your here and check out the fourms . there is a chat room full of great people come on in and introduce your self .. were glad your here ~ endzy ~
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