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-   -   Have an issue, dog lovers may not want to read........ (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/188099-have-issue-dog-lovers-may-not-want-read.html)

vegibean 11-07-2009 07:04 PM

Have an issue, dog lovers may not want to read........
 
My issue is that WITH OUT WARNING, my roommate brought home a dog. Dog lovers, don't take it offensively, but I hate the creatures. They are dirty, stink and this one is just a b*tch!! She hasn't been here a week and of course she has messed in the house. I cleaned it up because I discovered it at midnight, DIDN'T WANT THAT JOB!!!! Another reason why I DO NOT WANT A DOG!!!!

Tonight she bit my son, his feelings were hurt more than he was but now I'm just totally over the whole situation.

My roommate knew before hand that I have a strong dislike for dogs and "dislike" is the much more gentle way of expressing my true feelings.

Anyway, while I've told her what her dog is like while she's not here (the dog has major issues), she's comes off being a great dog when the roomie is here but as soon as she's out the door to work, the dog cowers by the door all day whining and God forbid you go near her, she growls and snaps at you, OVER IT!!!!!

I swear, this would be totally different if the dog on top of just being a dog, wasn't such a b*tch.

I know, you all probably don't hear/read anything like this from me.........but WHEW!!!! Something has got to give.

I know I need to talk to her, right now isn't the time, my son is here, I'm FUMING right now, I have to calm down.

I really needed to get this out of me. I needed to vent.

I need to say something, don't appreciate the crossing of my boundaries with out even asking me about it............done, done, done!!!! :zx11pisse

thirtybubba 11-07-2009 07:10 PM

:hug: Vegi...

For what it's worth, and understanding the term roommate to refer to an equal partner, or at least another paying partner, on a lease/rental agreement (lawyer in me tehee), you have every right to request there be no dogs. Especially, if as you so eloquently phrase it, you are somewhat known not to be a fan of the canine species. This shouldn't even have been an issue.

That' said, :hug: again.... The things we go through with roommates... sheesh.

And I'm a dog lover. Same opinion.
-TB.

TTOSBT 11-07-2009 07:14 PM

Ok, I love dogs but for me, this is not about dogs.
This is about boundaries and respect. Your roommate seems to have neither.
So...yes, you need to sit down and talk to her/him about it.
If I were you, I would write a letter to get the anger out first. Then I would write another in a more reasonable tone and then I would sit down and talk to the roommate about the situation.
You have every right to be angry and feel taken advantage of. Is this the first time your roommate has shown a complete disregard for your feelings and wishes??
If so, this is a HUGE red flag!
Good luck.

ANGELINA243 11-07-2009 07:32 PM

My first question--did you report the bite, especially if it broke the skin? Animal bites are to be taken very seriously. I would recommend calling the city Animal Control to at least report it if so. Also, does your son need medical care? I had a coworker that was hospitalized for a bite wound that got infected. First things first...is your child ok? Is the dog current on vaccines? (Sorry--I work in the veterinary field.) Also, I agree with the others--speaking with your roommate about boundaries etc.

vegibean 11-07-2009 07:34 PM


Is this the first time your roommate has shown a complete disregard for your feelings and wishes??
I sincerely believe that her actions were mostly because the dog was on it's way to the pound. That shouldn't have been her problem and now it's mine. :(

That probably was an important part of the above mentioned issue, however I'm just a bit blinded by my anger at the moment.

chrisinaustin 11-07-2009 10:12 PM

Being that the dog is alone in a brand new environment with someone who's full of animosity and rage towards her, you should expect her to be cowering near the door.

Whatever situation has now developed between you and your roommate, and/or whatever poor judgement they may have exhibited, the dog is innocent.

Sikkisirus 11-08-2009 12:46 AM

As Angelina quite rightly said, you need to find out if this dog has been vaccinated regarding a bite if its broken the skin. And your roommate was way out of order bringing in a dog without asking. I don't like dogs either but this is neither here nor there, my gripe was that you were not asked :wtf2

Gypsy Feet 11-08-2009 07:30 AM

I hope a new suitable home can be found for the dog, if you were in cali, I would be on my way to pick it up.

Freedom1990 11-08-2009 07:48 AM


Originally Posted by chrisinaustin (Post 2425395)
Being that the dog is alone in a brand new environment with someone who's full of animosity and rage towards her, you should expect her to be cowering near the door.

Whatever situation has now developed between you and your roommate, and/or whatever poor judgement they may have exhibited, the dog is innocent.

Agreed. Dogs are very tuned into what people are feeling.

As someone else has suggested, make sure that dog is up to date on the rabies vaccine since your son has been bit, and address this issue with your roommate immediately.

Enough21 11-08-2009 08:01 AM

Since everyone else has touched upon the fact that this entire scenario should not have happened in the first place, I will add to what can be done now. Tell your roommate that she must hire a behaviorist ASAP. Make sure that is a behaviorist, not a trainer, her veterinarian should be able to recommend one in your area.

Gypsy Feet 11-08-2009 08:10 AM

I'm sorry, I disagree. I think the dog must be found a new home immediately, as it is neither fair for Veg to have to live with a dog if she is against the idea, and unfair to the dog to live with anything less than an accepting, loving home.

In my county there hasn't been a case of dog rabies in decades, and other dog diseases aren't transmittable as far as I know to humans. Dog bites, like any other puncture or abrasion can get infected and should be washed and watched. Some dogs, especially fearful ones, are not a good match for homes with children, and that is reason enough to find the dog a new home asap.

Enough21 11-08-2009 08:20 AM

Gypsy, I appreciate your opinion and of course, agree. That said, at some point, whether in it's current home or its next, an animal behaviorist will be absolutely necessary. As with all behavioral issues, the sooner the problem is addressed, the more likely there will be improvement, that is why I feel the current caregiver should hire someone ASAP, even while they are in the process of finding a new home.

ETA: This would benefit Veg because a behaviorist will provide instructions for keeping everyone as safe as possible, while the aggression is being managed/modified or until a new home is found.

smacked 11-08-2009 08:22 AM

I hope the dog is found a loving home, asap! Not sure why roomie thought she was 'helping' the dog by bringing into a home where it wont be loved and accepted.

Bad roommate.

gerryP 11-08-2009 09:24 AM

Awww, poor woofie...

I am a dog lover, can't imagine life without having a dog, BUT, I understand completely vegi. Given your feelings about dogs, your home is not a good match. The dog of course senses this and is acting out. it's not the dogs fault, he doesn't know any better but biting your Son is not acceptable, but again the dog doesn't know any better. He definitely needs some intensive training, but by someone else from a home that wants a dog and the challenges that come with an aggressive, untrained woofie.

Hevyn 11-08-2009 10:17 AM

Another great SR discussion & helpful advice as usual.

It's all been said, so I'll just be hoping for a happy ending for all concerned, dog included.

kj3880 11-08-2009 10:52 AM

I know in my area, dog bites are supposed to be reported to the police, by calling 911, for the purposes of disease control and safeguarding the public, especially children. The police respond, take a report, and in this situation, the dog would be taken out of the home to the SPCA for testing and to safeguard the child. I don't think that I'd feel safe having my child in a home where a dog that bites is present. Even a small dog can damage a child's vulnerable face, even take out an eye. Perhaps this is why the past owners were taking the dog to the pound, to safeguard the children in their homes.

I love dogs. My labrador sleeps on the foot of my bed every night, and we're very close. As much as I love her, I would have to get rid of her if she presented a threat to my children. Kids' safety comes first, last, and always.

Love,
KJ

vegibean 11-08-2009 02:12 PM


Originally Posted by Hevyn (Post 2425781)
Another great SR discussion & helpful advice as usual.

It's all been said, so I'll just be hoping for a happy ending for all concerned, dog included.

Wanted to thank you all for your suggestions.

Hevyn, I'm sure the outcome will be a good one. I just really needed some place to "release" my frustrations.

Thanks you guys, as always you all are awesome!!!

Much Love!

Caitlin

endzoner 11-08-2009 04:19 PM

Hey Vegi .. sorry your having a bad one and hope voicing this crude helps your sholders feel lil bite lighter . You didnt mention if this is your place or not and really dont matter . but , If it is YOUR place you have every right to be upset with your renter .
You mentioned that the dog is a Bytch when the owner is gone , have you thought bout takin a lil video clip of the dogs actions when shes not there ? this giving you proof of why the dog isnt wanted in your place , The dog deserves a home where its wanted like others above have mentioned , the tenent should of contacted you to see if it was ok . but apparently that didnt happen or the dog wouldnt be there,, but anyways .. I send a huggle your way and hope for a better day for yah .. Endzy

Bamboozle 11-08-2009 05:04 PM

Hey, vegi. Please make sure the dog has been vaccinated for rabies...

barb dwyer 11-08-2009 05:37 PM

I love dogs.
I was a dog groomer for four years,
and now I still love dogs

but I don't want to OWN a dog.

I agree with Gypsy on this one.

It's not good for anyone involved in this situation.
The roomate, for YOU, or for the dog, or your child.

The most immediate solution
might be to take thwe dog
to a doggie daycare
during the hours the roomate
is working
(and possibly looking for another place to live)LOL

I mean
anyone who disregarded my feelings, opinions, and damage to my residence
*(I'm assuming that you rent TO the roomie)
is NOT someone *I* would be under the same roof with other than socially.
and briefly.


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