This is how bad i want to be clean! Help! Please!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 15
This is how bad i want to be clean! Help! Please!
I have been addicted to opiates since 2003. It started with Vicodin after spinal surgeries. I graduated to Oxycontin, then got off of that over a year ago by just going back on Vicodin. I then graduated to Heroin. I snorted it, never injected, not much differerence. I have been off of H for a month and a half. I cannot believe I got there. I went down to Oxycodones. Five Miligrams, taking about 12 a day. I have sucessfully withdrawn on my own more than once, but could never stay clean, as "people" in my life would call me and say they had something. THIS IS THE DRASTIC step I have taken to get clean. I LEFT THE STATE. I have been in a certain state for one week TRYING to wean down from Ocycodone to 5 mils of vicodin. I took 30 mils of Vics today, and have 2 left, ready for the freakin roller coaster ride to start, which it already has. It has not been easy this week, but this is how serious I am about getting my life back. I have no one to call here to get more. I will need your help and support this week. PLEASE!!!!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,355
Hi again wanttobeclean
Good to see you back.
You'll always find support here
What are you going to do different this time?
I'm not asking to be picky - I really want you never to be back at this point again.
Have you seen a Dr? Thought about counselling? NA? outpatient rehab?
I'm glad you understand it takes a lot - so pls...do whatever it takes - we'll be here to support you, but look at some real life support too.
Break the cycle
D
Good to see you back.
You'll always find support here
What are you going to do different this time?
I'm not asking to be picky - I really want you never to be back at this point again.
Have you seen a Dr? Thought about counselling? NA? outpatient rehab?
I'm glad you understand it takes a lot - so pls...do whatever it takes - we'll be here to support you, but look at some real life support too.
Break the cycle
D
Mr.MeToo?
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: East Coast to the Deep South
Posts: 828
Welcome to the site man. Sounds a lot like my story but once I "graduated" to heroin I never went back to Rx pills. Started injecting and was put in the half-nelson by dope for more than 4 years.
Just wanted you to know that you can recover. The geographical switch is a wise one if you truly are serious about recovery. I did the same (moving from NYC to south florida) to get rid of familiar people, environments, triggers etc.
Might want to suggest posting this in the substance abuse forums as well. Apparently you were around before (from Dee's reply) but I dont remember seeing you on the SA forums. Lots of great support // advice there. Stay strong ~~ Scott
Just wanted you to know that you can recover. The geographical switch is a wise one if you truly are serious about recovery. I did the same (moving from NYC to south florida) to get rid of familiar people, environments, triggers etc.
Might want to suggest posting this in the substance abuse forums as well. Apparently you were around before (from Dee's reply) but I dont remember seeing you on the SA forums. Lots of great support // advice there. Stay strong ~~ Scott
Owner of a strange glitch.
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: midsouth
Posts: 2,331
Welcome to SR, Iwant 
Stay around, "I want" can become "I am" astonishingly quickly...
Lots of support around here, lots of success. You're not alone :ghug2
Take care, stay safe,
TB
Stay around, "I want" can become "I am" astonishingly quickly...Lots of support around here, lots of success. You're not alone :ghug2
Take care, stay safe,
TB
Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Bethany, OK
Posts: 47
Welcome back to recovery wantto. I'm really glad that you proclaim yourself to be wantto and not needto. Here in my little recovery world we hate the phrase, need to. I have 83 days today although I have been a part of my recovery support group for 20 years. I feel that I must have face to face support but if I couldn't, I certainly would be prepared to pull up a comfy chair and wear out a few keyboards on this site as it is the closest thing to a really good recovery meeting that I have ever encountered outside the walls of a clubhouse or members home group. Please keep posting. Thank you for your honesty. John in Oklahoma
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 15
Thank you all for your kid words and support! This means so much to me. GOD has blessed me somehow. I got a massage yeterday morning and it releases a lot of the toxins, I downed as much water as possible to get them out, and I woke up today, with minimal withdrawl symptoms. The worst I (physical) is over, I HOPE. I am taking one 5 mg vicodin this am, and my LAST one 5 mil in 8 hours. It has been very hard weaning down, and I have been feeling like crap most of the week. I do plan on finding NA meetings down here and continuing support from you wonderful people who understand. I am so serious about this, I want my life back.....opiates have ALMOST destroyed it.
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