tricky
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 151
tricky
dunno if this is the place to post this sort of thing. but ill go for the 'All In' approach right from the bat, even if it is just on an internet forum. ive had positive experiences on other forums unrelated to alcoholism, so im willing to give it a try.
Im a 31yr old guy and due to my drinking everything is slowly coming apart . ive been losing friends, aspirations, self respect, sense of purpose, health, financial security etc etc and happiness is away on permanent vacation. ive always been well liked, bubbly and full of life. but has been slipping away one drink at a time for at a guess 10 years.
I have been to 3 AA meetings with an open mind, didnt really take part just sat & listened. It hasnt helped YET. I have a wonderful girlfriend whos also alcoholic, but she has been 2 1/2 years sober (she was the one who introduced me to AA. shes been an angel to me but after 3 benders over the last 3 weeks the last one finishing 2 days ago (6 days solid drinking (ouch)) her patience is worn thin and i can tell im just hurting her & shes getting angry with me which is in turn making me unhappy, which makes me wanna go '**** it' and drink. i think shes pretty much gonna give me the flick, booo. i dont wanna sober up just to save the relationship. i wanna sober up so i dont spend the remainder of my life in this personal hell ive managed t build.
but its proving to be too 'tricky' so far.
so yeah thats probably enough for an intro, any advice will be listened to.
hopefully some good will come of signing up to this forum
for reading
Im a 31yr old guy and due to my drinking everything is slowly coming apart . ive been losing friends, aspirations, self respect, sense of purpose, health, financial security etc etc and happiness is away on permanent vacation. ive always been well liked, bubbly and full of life. but has been slipping away one drink at a time for at a guess 10 years.
I have been to 3 AA meetings with an open mind, didnt really take part just sat & listened. It hasnt helped YET. I have a wonderful girlfriend whos also alcoholic, but she has been 2 1/2 years sober (she was the one who introduced me to AA. shes been an angel to me but after 3 benders over the last 3 weeks the last one finishing 2 days ago (6 days solid drinking (ouch)) her patience is worn thin and i can tell im just hurting her & shes getting angry with me which is in turn making me unhappy, which makes me wanna go '**** it' and drink. i think shes pretty much gonna give me the flick, booo. i dont wanna sober up just to save the relationship. i wanna sober up so i dont spend the remainder of my life in this personal hell ive managed t build.
but its proving to be too 'tricky' so far.
so yeah thats probably enough for an intro, any advice will be listened to.
hopefully some good will come of signing up to this forum
for reading
Owner of a strange glitch.
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: midsouth
Posts: 2,331
Welcome ND 
Yeah, it's the right place, the right post... and this alcohol thing is mighty tricky indeed.
I don't really have any advice, although I believe I am acquainted with your personal hell... they must mass produce them somewhere. More people will be along that know more things than I do.
Hang in there,
-TB
Yeah, it's the right place, the right post... and this alcohol thing is mighty tricky indeed.
I don't really have any advice, although I believe I am acquainted with your personal hell... they must mass produce them somewhere. More people will be along that know more things than I do.
Hang in there,-TB
Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Littleton, Co.
Posts: 3,317
Welcome to SR
It does indeed sound like your ready to give up the alcohol and it is a good thing that you want to do it for yourself and not to save a relationship. Keep coming back here; this place saved me in the beginning and continues to be a huge support.
It does indeed sound like your ready to give up the alcohol and it is a good thing that you want to do it for yourself and not to save a relationship. Keep coming back here; this place saved me in the beginning and continues to be a huge support.
being me
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: CA
Posts: 252
Welcome to SR!
I too found that I wasn't growing as a person with alcohol so dominant in my life. It isn't always easy, but I can say it is getting easier and the rewards are very worth it.
Keep reading and stick around, a lot of great advice and people here.
I too found that I wasn't growing as a person with alcohol so dominant in my life. It isn't always easy, but I can say it is getting easier and the rewards are very worth it.
Keep reading and stick around, a lot of great advice and people here.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 3
I'm totally the last guy that should give advice, strugling with my own personal hell as well. However I agree you shouldn't do this for or even remotely tie it to your relationship with your GF. The truth it, that relationship might not work for other reasons and if it goes downhill you don't want to have your sobriety leaning on it.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,476
Welcome!
Alcoholism is an incredibly tricky disease. The power of denial is so huge. When I look back on the way my mind worked during the years I was drinking, I am amazed at the level of denial.
There is lots of support here, so keep reading and posting.
Alcoholism is an incredibly tricky disease. The power of denial is so huge. When I look back on the way my mind worked during the years I was drinking, I am amazed at the level of denial.
There is lots of support here, so keep reading and posting.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 151
wow quick on the replies! thanks for the kind words...appreciated 
was actually pretty helpfull just writing stuff down.
...just had a long yack on the phone to aforementioned female...i think we have a plan in place that obviously involves me sorting my life out somewhat...again tricky but she wants to stick by me...up to me now i guess
ill have a scan around the forum soooon
\"/
was actually pretty helpfull just writing stuff down.
...just had a long yack on the phone to aforementioned female...i think we have a plan in place that obviously involves me sorting my life out somewhat...again tricky but she wants to stick by me...up to me now i guess
ill have a scan around the forum soooon
\"/
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,536
Congratulations on your decision, nd - you will not regret it. You'll be saved from the living hell many of us have put ourselves in. Life will not become chaos - your health won't suffer. You're at a fork in the road, and you're choosing the right path.
Hoping to hear more about how it's going for you. We care.
Hoping to hear more about how it's going for you. We care.
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