SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Hello SR Forum.

Alcoholic since 18 YO 1985.

My name is steven from louisiana.I am an 43 year old male alcoholic/addict.
My rock bottom was in March of 2007,when I was coming home from a bar drunk
driving in my truck with my wife.

I was about a 1/2 mile from my house in the country,when I
fell asleep at the wheel.I remember my wife screaming oh my
God and when I came to I freaked out and jerked the steering
wheel to get back onto the road,and the truck went air born
and rolled five times head light over tail light style,and
we both were thrown from the truck.

I remember seeing my wife at a distance face down.I managed to
get over to her and she was not responding.I then passed out my-
self and came to when the air-life helicopter was putting me on a
stretcher.Me and my wife were both flown to a trauma center.

The doctors thought we both would die.The miracle is we both were
released the next day.I had to turn myself in for arrest of a DUI and
I was quickly bonded out and payed my fines and the terms of my
year of probation ect.

Me and my wife were both bumbed up pretty good.Her neck was hurt
along with her back.Most of my ribs were broken and we both were
scraped up by rolling through the gravel and grass,where we received
grass burns.We are miracles to have survived and I thank God.

I was sober for a few months while recovering from the wreck and
decided to have a beer and was drunk for about 6 months before
going into a short 72 hour detox center.

I have had three small slips since Feburary 2008.My first slip I drank
a six pack and got a head ache and drank nothing again for about another
six months until another slip where I drank about a twelve pack and then
nothing for another four months.My last slip about eight months ago was
roughly a three week relapse and I have had nothing since as far as alcohol
goes.

I started visiting my sister on a daily basis who is a pain management patient.
She knew I was still hurting from my wreck in 2007 and would give me a 10mg
percocet,every time I would visit her.I would feel so good from this pill that
I finally got into pain management after test and MRI`s ect.About seven months
ago I was put on 20mg of Oxycontin every twelve hours which is twice daily.Since
starting them I cut them into four pieces into 5mg pieces that I would take every
3 or 4 hours throughout the day.

I have noticed my thinking has changed for the worse since getting on these pills.
I have been slowly weaning myself off from the generic oxycontin which is oxycodone.
I was in wal-mart in the book section last Friday,and I had a weird experience mentally.
I felt for a short period of time that I was going to go insane.Then on Sunday me and my
wife went to church and while the preacher was preaching the same feeling came over me
again and I almost lost it in the meeting but managed to not freak and finally the service
was over.

I dont know if my weaning off oxycodone is to fast causing these weird feelings but I am
determined to get off for good.I am down to 5mg 4 times a day from up to 40mg a day.

In the past I was diagnosed at 8 years old as being ADHD and a couple of years ago having a
panic disorder and a bipolar disorder where I stay in the manic phase constantly and the Oxy
induces mania.

Thank you for listening and being here.

Steven.