mariechi

I'm on about my 14th day of sobriety. Since the day I had to face my alcoholism, I have been here at SR frequently. The first week or so I was here as a full time job, reading and posting. I'm really happy and working on this and I have lots of support and everything is good.

I'm scheduled for five weeks Tues and Thurs, one individual and two group sessions. My counselor gave me an AA group I can attend Mon, Tues and Thurs. Tonight will be my first. So what's the problem?

I'm suddenly tired of the subject of my own recovery. I don't mean I think myself cured and beyond danger. Ridiculous. I'm not feeling any temptation to drink. Is it mental burnout from introspection? I'm sure it's temporary, but it's caught me off guard. I had a lovely day today. Got everything checked off my to-do list. Three birthdays coming up and found the right gift for each. Am feeling happy and productive and positive.

So do we occasionally just go through this?

Mattcake

I can relate, Mariechi.

Obsessing about recovery can be pretty draining for some of us. When I first found SR and committed to recovery, I spent every waking hour here (reading, posting and in the chatroom). It was necessary at the time.

Now, it's all about balance... working on my ongoing recovery issues/helping out my peers, and also making the time to actually enjoy the freedom of being sober

Aysha

I'm with matty on this one. And I have had many talks with him about this exact subject.
I think it is normal and healthy to live without obsessing about recovery. Like matty said. There will be a balance. Yes, we have to remnd ourselves everyday that using or drinking isnt an option. But it doesnt have to be all you think about and do every waking moment.
Its not a bad thing. Its what your suppose to do. Ease back into living your life like you should do. I think for me , obsessing about recovery and being all about it every second is just as bad a s when I was using.
It sounds to me your on the right track.
Its ok to forget about recovery for a moment to live life.
Just be sure to always have it handy. And always remember everyday what it is that your living for now.

Anna

I am SO enjoying the journey of recovery.

I enjoy working on my recovery every day. Sometimes, there are slumps when it seems nothing is moving forward, but then things pick up again.

I've been doing this for nine years and I can honestly say, I have never been tired of it.

least

Analyzing life may be necessary, but it's also necessary to just enjoy living. Finding a balance in life is hard but can be done. Just take it as you get it, one day at a time.:ghug3

Hevyn

It's definitely normal. In the beginning I obsessed over my recovery to the point that I was even boring myself. Our emotions are all over the map in the beginning & it takes some getting used to. Eventually we do calm down and relax a bit. You're doing great.

mariechi

Thanks everybody. It's good to know and very comforting. Yes, balance is key. I was afraid I was on my way to falling away and ending up as bad or worse than before. No, that won't happen. .

Aysha

I come here everyday. Thats helps me. I also have a daily readings book that I have made a thread of here. Body Mind and Spirit that I read everyday.
But once that obsession of using goes away. Sow ill the obsession of being stuck in recovery.
I am just egtting to that point myself where I can have a normal day where all my thoughts arent about trying not to use or wanting to use. It really isnt even part of my thinking much anymore. As before all I thought about was using, The past, not using, being scared. I mean I was 24/7 thinking about either using or not using. I also would talk about either all the time. I dont even mention it too much anymore. And I will tell you. It feels really good to not be a slave physically, mentally or emotionally anymore for either of it.
Anytime I got money I would have anxiety for days. And all I could think about was battling myself to try and not go get high. Now it really doesnt even cross my mind. At least it isnt the first thing anyway.
Now I look forward to paying bills and buying things I need and want. Going and doing things.
This attempt at recovery for me is very very differetn than any before.
And it is just happening naturally. I have to be sure and not feed those little thoughts if they do come up. I stop in an instant and just make it known to myself. It is not even an option. So dont even try and rationalise it.
And once I started doing that and meanig it. It has helped so much. I do have to do something for my recovery at least once a day.
But my life doesnt have to revolve around it anymore.
Your not alone.