Hi and Welcome,
I'm glad you found us.
I'm sure the situation is difficult for you, and I wonder if you have considered seeking help for yourself at AlAnon.
Also, we have two forums here for Friends and Families, and you might want to check them out.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.