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Old 10-01-2009, 10:36 PM   #1 (permalink)

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I'm new here-- and also CRAZY!! ???!?!

Hi, I'm new here. I believe I will overcome this problem relatively soon. Probably a lot of you do not believe this. I actually did it once before, when I was in my early 20's. I am now 30. Unlike a lot of alcoholics and drug users, I am a pretty authoritative and straight-forward guy. A lot of people even think I am mean. In that regard, I might be useful to you. I won't lie to you about your problems, or my own. I actually *have* considered several times becoming a police officer. And I could easily do it. I have no problem with argumentative people and even though I'm not a big guy, I am extremely strong for my weight, which is about 170, and I am a male.

So I am not on some huge mental trip about this, like I'm sure a lot of you, maybe most, are. I am deciding to quit drinking because of my negative words to family and friends recently while under the influence of alcohol. But I still, even when drinking, am able to remain a logical and authoritative person. The only, the ONLY reason I have not become a police officer is because I disagree with the United States' marijuana laws and in fact, this is the main avenue in which I became an alcoholic! Maybe that deserves a post in itself! This not a "taboo" topic! But I digress....

I was a regular pot smoker as a youngster and at age 19, I was arrested for posessing marijuana. At that age, thinking that drugs can actually make a person happy, I figured I would drink instead, since my probation officer wasn't testing me for alcohol. And so, that's how it began for me. I think alcohol is horrible and I think I would make an absolutely *great* police officer because I am sort of a drill-sergent type of guy by DNA. I'm a hard-nosed person you might not like.... but that trait can be a real grace in this life, sometimes.

So anyway....... I don't want to go on a tangent about law or politics. Alcohol is bad either way. But I will not become an officer and enforce ridiculous marijuana laws on 15 year old kids who smoke a joint behind the gym. They have enough to deal with already. But I do have some alcohol problems and today started an outpatient rehab. It is a good decision for me, the best I've made in 8 years probably.

I was hoping to not make this long because I myself hate reading really long posts but I hope you read this anyway. You should let *me* be your conselour because I will bust your A** without question! But I actually need to bust my own. So I hope I make some friends here. Hiya! I'm really freakin' crazy even WITHOUT alcohol so you can imagine how I eventually get with it!!! But I have absolutely no shame! I openly admit that I am crazy and a drunk!! Woohoo!!!!

But I also, joking aside, know it has sometimes been a serious problem for me, and probably for you. So..... let's crush this thing. It can be done-- I've done it before!! When you quit for a long period, you just can't ever do it again... That's where I failed. I quit in my lower 20's but I knew nothing about it. I just quit because I knew I needed to.... I didn't know you should never drink again if you quit. So anyway.... HI!!! I'm freakin' crazy! Even when I'm sober! Oh... I have ADHD!!! Maybe that's why I talk so much!!!!!!!!
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Old 10-01-2009, 11:03 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Hi Gem Star

Welcome to SR

I wish you success with quitting again like you did in your 20s - I found to my horror that alcoholism was a progressive disease - the stuff I could fairly easily put down and walk away from in my 20s became nearly impossible to put down in my 30s.

*Nearly* impossible, but not completely - luckily I found the great group of people here, who helped and guided me to where I am today - 2 and a half years sober next week.

I wish the same for you too.

Keep reading and posting - good luck with your outpatient course

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Old 10-01-2009, 11:04 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Welcome to SR ...

Good to know you are working towards sobriety.
Each Day Sober Is A Victory!!
Joy In AA Recovery!

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Old 10-02-2009, 01:34 AM   #4 (permalink)
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to SR Gem We are all a little crazy in our own way. You will find a lot of support here... and even the odd kick in the butt when you need it

Take Care,

"Today is the first day of the rest of your life"
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Old 10-02-2009, 01:39 AM   #5 (permalink)
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welcome to sr.

god bless
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Old 10-02-2009, 04:15 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Hey Gem, welcome to SR! Best wishes on your road to recovery. Maybe use a little of that Drill Sargent DNA on yourself.
"When you're green, you grow, when you're ripe, you rot. Don't stop learning." ~ Unknown
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Old 10-02-2009, 01:41 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Welcome, enjoy the sober life! I know I do
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Old 10-02-2009, 01:59 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Welcome GemStar! Keep us posted on your progress.

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Old 10-02-2009, 03:41 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Keep coming back, you'll find a lot of support here.
Always remember that you are unique. Just like everybody else.
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Old 10-02-2009, 04:24 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I am glad you found us and I hope you take a look around and make yourself comfortable.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

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Old 10-02-2009, 04:37 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Hello Gemstar,

A HUGE WELCOME to Sober Recovery! Sobriety is a wonderful way of life. Looking forward to sharing more of your experience, strength and hope in the days to come.

Love Pancake xo
Sober since January 1, 2009
NON-Smoker since September 16, 2009
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Old 10-03-2009, 08:56 AM   #12 (permalink)
Disposable Hero
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Any clean addict is a miracle and keeping the miracle alive
is an ongoing process of awareness, surrender, and growth
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Old 10-03-2009, 10:00 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Welcome to SR, GemStar.
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Old 10-03-2009, 10:13 AM   #14 (permalink)
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OK Gemstar, you will quit drinkin' and smokin' dope or I will rip off your head and sh1t down your neck...

Hey man, if that works for you. I prefer a less confrontational approach as found in the first 3 steps of AA.

Welcome to SR!!

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