scotslad

Wow....

Thanks to all of you for the fantastic response. Feeling kind of blue today as it was not the answers I wanted to hear but you are all so conclusive that the answer is NO...

Now I need to figure out how to mentally get myself ready to take the next step forward. As I mentioned I need a push and I am sure I can get it from this forum. I intend now to make an appointment with my doctor to talk about this further and see how they can help me with some medication for the withdrawls.

Many thanks to you all. I will keep you updated and be a regular on this forum from now on.

All teh best to you all

Hilltopper1972

I know I need to completely abstain from drinking as I'm sure you do. Despite this, there is a part of me that has some phony dream that I can control my drinking and be like everybody else. In fact not only have I not been able to completely walk away from alcohol, I continue to trick myself with complete lies and fabrications about it "being ok". Its all lies. I woke up this morning feeling like hell from a one night binge. Why? What possible logical reason did I do that to myself? For a buzz? Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Hill

gingernyc

Dear Scotsclad, I finally humbled myself and asked my doctor for a prescription to help with withdrawal. My main complaints were that I would get completely panicky, heart pounding, anxious as well as insomnia and night sweats. He prescribed benzos which I only needed to take for about a week. I also have a fairly high-powered job where I needed to really be on my game, and I was worried I wouldn't be able to function/perform during those first few weeks, but I was fine--a little off, but nothing anyone would really notice. I know we're not supposed to give medical advice, but all I can say is after years of telling myself that "I will not drink today" and then still drinking because I couldn't deal with the withdrawal, going to my doc was just what I needed to "be very comfortable" in his words. I was afraid to take the benzos for too long, because I didn't want another monkey on my back. Best of luck to you.

chrisinaustin

Ok, here's your push (courtesy of my great-grandsponsor):
Upshot: Take the step; find yourself ready for the next one. Instead of a push, think of being pulled to where you want/need to be.

seehseef

Great posts here about returning to social drinking and the traps and pitfalls we encounter when it's attempted.

Mrak, I haven't heard that statement before, but that sums it all up for me right there. I also agree with Tazman53's statement that it's far more difficult to try to control your drinking than it is just to avoid it altogether.

I'm five weeks sober now and my life is far better without the added baggage that comes with social drinking. I've been to a few social gatherings in that time where the booze was flowing and I was able to have a great time while watching several other people (for a change) drink far too much and make fools of themselves. On the way home from one of these gatherings last week, I was pulled over for speeding. While I was annoyed (and definitely guilty), I was also incredibly relieved that I didn't have to worry about gathering my wits to appear sober, or popping Altoids to mask my breath, etc.

I've bookmarked this thread, as it contains an awful lot of counter-arguments to social drinking excuses I've made to myself in the past. Thanks again to all for your helpful advice.

TheLadyb

For me, even one drink opens the door

and I am off to the races,,,,,for days.
Moderation does not work, if you are here, it is because deep down you know there is a problem. The disease will tell you you can moderate, it has told me that WAY too many times, and that is why I am back to day 4 right not.

This time I have committed to total abstinance....not even 1, not even 1 glass of wine at dinner with friends, because the one glass of wine, will turn into a bottle of Vodka in a few days, may-be I can control myself that night at dinner, may-be not, but without a doubt it will lead to more drinking in a very short time.

Do not open that door. Ugliness and disaster are on the other side.