howmanyrelapses?
i've done my almost
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
howmanyrelapses?
I'm back on day one, again. I called my sponsor as soon as it happened, but of course, I should have called him before.
I was able to stop, this time, and catch myself. Do I think this means I can drink with control? Of course not. I'm going to get right back up and keep trying.
My question is - is it normal to have these relapses? I've come a long way in the last few weeks, but can't seem to get more than a few days to a week together before I "relapse" again.
Thank you.
I was able to stop, this time, and catch myself. Do I think this means I can drink with control? Of course not. I'm going to get right back up and keep trying.
My question is - is it normal to have these relapses? I've come a long way in the last few weeks, but can't seem to get more than a few days to a week together before I "relapse" again.
Thank you.
Disposable Hero
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Being, ME
Posts: 3,758
If you consider how long it took for you to become an alcoholic,
you may be able to answear that question better than anyone else.
IMHO, relapses are just a result of a process that is
still progressing unchecked & has not been addressed.
i hope & pray that you can put your desire for sobriety
into action, one day at a time, and begin to recover.
Thank you for staying sober today. Keep hope alive!!
you may be able to answear that question better than anyone else.
IMHO, relapses are just a result of a process that is
still progressing unchecked & has not been addressed.
i hope & pray that you can put your desire for sobriety
into action, one day at a time, and begin to recover.
Thank you for staying sober today. Keep hope alive!!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,474
I don't know if it's normal, but a lot of people have relapses.
For me, I would fail after a few days or a few weeks, out of fear. I knew that recovery meant accepting things about myself and my life that I didn't want to look at. I was afraid of living in the light.
I'm glad you're trying again.
For me, I would fail after a few days or a few weeks, out of fear. I knew that recovery meant accepting things about myself and my life that I didn't want to look at. I was afraid of living in the light.
I'm glad you're trying again.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: The Sunny South
Posts: 1,666
Hi there...glad you caught yourself.
The reason I couldn't get past a few days, or weeks for a long time was because I drank. I bought alcohol, or didn't get rid of what was in my home, the temptation was there and I caved.
I finally decided I want my soberity,my sanity more then I wanted any quick fix. I remembered the lies that alcohol whispered to me...the awful detox...and knowing the only way not to go thru this again was not to drink.
I had to firm up my recovery program to have the tools in place to face situations, and not drink.
What was working for you in your recovery program?
The reason I couldn't get past a few days, or weeks for a long time was because I drank. I bought alcohol, or didn't get rid of what was in my home, the temptation was there and I caved.
I finally decided I want my soberity,my sanity more then I wanted any quick fix. I remembered the lies that alcohol whispered to me...the awful detox...and knowing the only way not to go thru this again was not to drink.
I had to firm up my recovery program to have the tools in place to face situations, and not drink.
What was working for you in your recovery program?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 617
I can't count all the relapses I had. Just NEVER QUIT TRYING TO STOP. If you get knocked down a million times, get up a million and one. the" sobreity thing" will eventually sink in over time. Best of luck.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,899
Keep at it Kjell.
I've had my fair share of relapsing. Each time I review my addiction treatment program and make some changes. Even though I have relapsed a few times in the 3 3/4 years that I've been in addiction treatment this go around...I have made continuous progress in my over all well-being
.
I've had my fair share of relapsing. Each time I review my addiction treatment program and make some changes. Even though I have relapsed a few times in the 3 3/4 years that I've been in addiction treatment this go around...I have made continuous progress in my over all well-being
.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: SC, USA
Posts: 43
I started seriously trying to quit Oct 7, 2008. I failed, guilt-tripped, failed, guilt-tripped in three day to two week episodes until June 2 of this year. It took basically those 8 months to beat back the lying game I played in my mind. The other thing that beat me down over that time period was the guilt that snowballed with each failure to quit. I finally got so desperate with the load of guilt, the constant failures, and being sick and tired of the mental anguish that comes with denial. I finally just gave up....was sick of battling.....admitted I was an alchy.......and got help here.
Awaiting Email Confirmation
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 2,942
There is no normal.
But being honest and admitting the relapse, accepting responsibility is good.
Just try and remember - some don't live through their next relapse.
Keep coming back - make it happen.
But being honest and admitting the relapse, accepting responsibility is good.
Just try and remember - some don't live through their next relapse.
Keep coming back - make it happen.
i've done my almost
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
This is one of those times in life when you don't wish "ill will" on anyone, but it does make me feel better to know that others have gone through this before.
Everything seems complicated at the moment, but simple at the same time.
I'm starting to believe what "they" say is true. This is a constant, everyday battle.
Thank you to all that responded.
Everything seems complicated at the moment, but simple at the same time.
I'm starting to believe what "they" say is true. This is a constant, everyday battle.
Thank you to all that responded.
Owner of a strange glitch.
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: midsouth
Posts: 2,331
Kjell, I just did that. 11, 4, 5, 16 and counting...
Don't know what's normal--in anything, much less getting sober.
But, like Wolfchild said, consider how long it took you to get here. I abused the SR sober calculator and figured out I have been drinking for about 7500 days. I've been sober for a grand total of less than 40. Drinking is still the comfort zone, the chicken soup for the thirtybubba soul... And it takes pretty much all of me not to drink again, especially on days like today.
You fell, you caught yourself, you climbed back up off your knees, *you realize this does not equate control*--you've got the same skills I got in this 'field.'
All I did next was find some things to keep me as busy as possible. It's just every day, "don't go to the store." Don't have further advice, 'cause I'm not much further ahead than you...
Take care,
TB
Don't know what's normal--in anything, much less getting sober.
But, like Wolfchild said, consider how long it took you to get here. I abused the SR sober calculator and figured out I have been drinking for about 7500 days. I've been sober for a grand total of less than 40. Drinking is still the comfort zone, the chicken soup for the thirtybubba soul... And it takes pretty much all of me not to drink again, especially on days like today.
You fell, you caught yourself, you climbed back up off your knees, *you realize this does not equate control*--you've got the same skills I got in this 'field.'
All I did next was find some things to keep me as busy as possible. It's just every day, "don't go to the store." Don't have further advice, 'cause I'm not much further ahead than you...
Take care,
TB
Owner of a strange glitch.
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: midsouth
Posts: 2,331
Sure, let's do this...
Not a Lakers fan, Nets actually, but haven't followed the regular season for a couple years due to school. Hard to get to watch the games, didn't want to watch part time, and it ended up just another thing I liked that got in the way of school...
Not a Lakers fan, Nets actually, but haven't followed the regular season for a couple years due to school. Hard to get to watch the games, didn't want to watch part time, and it ended up just another thing I liked that got in the way of school...
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,378
Hi Kjell
I could never go more than a few days sober - I was like this for 15 years or so...I always said I was willing, always thought I was doing my utmost - but I wasn't. No way.
There's a million things I could have done back then apart from drinking, but I didn't bother, or dismissed it. I let my addiction do the talking, and I let it take the wheel....over and over again.
Some part of me knew recovery meant change - and I was never good with change.
I let that fear run virtually unchecked and I got worse and worse...that fear nearly killed me - don't let it get to the point where it nearly kills you, ok?
Make those calls beforehand next time, or post here - do whatever you need to do to break the cycle.
D
I could never go more than a few days sober - I was like this for 15 years or so...I always said I was willing, always thought I was doing my utmost - but I wasn't. No way.
There's a million things I could have done back then apart from drinking, but I didn't bother, or dismissed it. I let my addiction do the talking, and I let it take the wheel....over and over again.
Some part of me knew recovery meant change - and I was never good with change.
I let that fear run virtually unchecked and I got worse and worse...that fear nearly killed me - don't let it get to the point where it nearly kills you, ok?
Make those calls beforehand next time, or post here - do whatever you need to do to break the cycle.
D
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: In my head...tis dark in here!
Posts: 213
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Hi Kjell
There's a million things I could have done back then apart from drinking, but I didn't bother, or dismissed it. I let my addiction do the talking, and I let it take the wheel....over and over again.
Some part of me knew recovery meant change - and I was never good with change.
D
There's a million things I could have done back then apart from drinking, but I didn't bother, or dismissed it. I let my addiction do the talking, and I let it take the wheel....over and over again.
Some part of me knew recovery meant change - and I was never good with change.
D
That sounds like me...I'm not very good with change...I also feel a lot of confidence has slid away over the years, that doesnt help when you have to embark on something different...
I agree kjell, it's a constant battle...some days it can become very tiresome...trying to think of things to keep distracted when the pull is always there...
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: On my way
Posts: 173
it is a constant battle, everyday. and from what i am learning from some aa members, even with 13, 22, 25 years of sobriety, this has to be a life long commitment.
i have been trying to quit for almost 4 years, on my own. just started going to aa last monday.
i now realize how many changes i really do need to make in my whole way of thinking, my whole way of how i've been living my life.
it seems so overwhelming, but it is possible. i've met so many people who have done it and are truely happy!!!
don't give up. keep moving in the right direction. day by day.
try and keep it simple, and don't be down on yourself, it only makes things harder.
It is possible!!! Just have to work for it.
i have been trying to quit for almost 4 years, on my own. just started going to aa last monday.
i now realize how many changes i really do need to make in my whole way of thinking, my whole way of how i've been living my life.
it seems so overwhelming, but it is possible. i've met so many people who have done it and are truely happy!!!
don't give up. keep moving in the right direction. day by day.
try and keep it simple, and don't be down on yourself, it only makes things harder.
It is possible!!! Just have to work for it.
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