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Old 09-08-2009, 10:11 AM
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just curious

I've been scrolling down on different posts, and I noticed most topics entail relapse. AA is strongly encouraged and I'm actually in it, but its scary seen so many relapses while in the program. if one has a sponsor and working the steps, why would there be a relapse?
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Old 09-08-2009, 10:29 AM
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Originally Posted by rochadad View Post
...why would there be a relapse?
This is the "Newcomers" forum.

A lot of the folks here have not even taken a first step. Some are still sitting on the fence, so to speak.

If you are looking for stronger recovery try;

Alcoholism - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Alcoholism-12 Step Support - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Old 09-08-2009, 10:53 AM
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I guess if it was that easy and plain sailing, i.e. just working the AA steps and having a sponsor.....then there'd be no need for sites like this....tis all a process....
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Old 09-08-2009, 11:32 AM
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Rocha, this isn't an AA forum..

However, tons of folks in AA "relapse", or "choose to drink" as I call it

Just like any other program or plan for recovery...

People drink til they're done.. we all know that, don't we?
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Old 09-08-2009, 11:40 AM
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"but its scary seen so many relapses while in the program. if one has a sponsor and working the steps, why would there be a relapse?"

Just a suggestion. Focusing on relapses and asking why in and of itself has the potential to cause relapse. As to working AA; make sure you're sponsor has some good sobriety, a least five years. And try focusing on why people DON'T relapse. As Smacked mentioned, some people just are not ready to be done. And when you or any one else is ready, is it really is about "whatever it takes (for you). Welcome and best of luck. Humbly on Day 40.
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Old 09-08-2009, 12:01 PM
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Originally Posted by rochadad View Post
...but its scary seen so many relapses while in the program. if one has a sponsor and working the steps, why would there be a relapse?
It is scary. Sort of tells me how daunting this alcoholism thing is. And how lucky we few are. The vast majority of real alcoholics will never find recovery. That's just the facts. If I don't want to be one of them, I better work at my recovery like my life depends on it.

In my experience, I've seen hundreds of folks get and stay sober without relapsing by thoroughly taking AA's steps. I've seen thousands more who are 'in AA' relapse over and over or just disappear.

In my experience, there is a huge difference between thoroughly taking AA's steps and being in AA. It's the difference between AA and group therapy, between night and day, between recovery and relapse, and between a spiritual awakening or white knuckling.

I have seen a fair number of guys have a drinking spree while thoroughly taking the steps. By all observation, they seem to be doing things thoroughly and still go on a few day bender. These examples are rare, though. That just tells me that alcoholism is a real serious deal. It also tells me that a spiritual awakening doesn't come from getting a step or two complete. The 10th step promises are placed at step 10 for a reason. You don't get those by working step 4.

Nine times out of ten, that relapse coincides with someone who has stalled in their progress in the steps. They just get stuck on something, entertain some reservations, and try to get through it on their own.

Even including those people who try the drinking experiment once more at some point while taking the steps, I have never seen someone relapse who thoroughly works the steps and lives by the principles. I just haven't seen it. Everybody I know that has had a spiritual awakening as the result of the steps has stayed sober. I know a lot of alkies, and that's a lot of years of cummulative sobriety.
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Old 09-08-2009, 12:33 PM
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The only real reason for relapse is that people decide they want to drink more than they want to be sober. I agree with keith alcoholism is extremely serious many people do drink until they die.
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Old 09-08-2009, 12:35 PM
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Just because someone is in a program does not mean they are WORKING the program. Alcoholics/addicts are experts at deceit/lying, I know I was; someone can perform the steps and go through all the motions but if they are not committed in their heart then they are just going through the motions.
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Old 09-08-2009, 12:44 PM
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I agree with Boleo, come on up to the AA 12 step forum, we are so busy disputing what Bill REALLY meant by his use of the word "is" we don't have time to drink

Bill Clinton and Bill Wilson had a few things in common you know.

I'm teasing, but come on up, there is recovery there, and quite frankly a number of recovered alcoholics, plus questions and answers about the steps in the steps forum
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Old 09-08-2009, 02:26 PM
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I understand what your saying and it used to really scare me. I am pretty new with 70 odd days under my belt but when i think back at how many times I "relapsed" when trying to quit or had a week in, they are pretty immeasurable....some people say it's a part of recovery, but I don't think so. I think when we are done, we know and we work our da#@est to stay sober, no matter what. Relapse for me is not an option but at the beginning it was all I knew.

~Jade
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Old 09-08-2009, 05:10 PM
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Its a recovery forum rochadad - relapse and struggles (and helping those in trouble) is kinda why we're here I'd have thought?

I'm sure there are some 'we're-recovered.com' sites out there but I have no interest in backslapping.

I'm not sure I get the 'stronger recovery elsewhere' posts either...I've been here nearly every day for almost 2 and half a years...beside places like the 12 step forums, I think the big forums - Newbies, Alcoholism, SubAbuse - are pretty much the same mix of people in trouble and people trying to help.

To me thats what SR is all about
D
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Old 09-08-2009, 05:22 PM
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I believe there is a probability (however low) of relapse regardless how perfectly one works any program of addiction treatment. I think it has something to do with being a fallible human.
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