Cath1029

So I don't know if I have to start over or not (see "Did I Fail" post). Whatever. Who gives a s**t anymore. After tomorrow I will be stuck here until October 11th with no phone anyway. Sorry to b***h. I know I'm supposed to keep a positive attitude, but not feeling it right now.

Robzoloft

Hey All....My latest sobriety date is Sept.14th...got a week today. Thanks for the invite to join this thread......ROB

Dee74

Cath it's entirely up to you if you feel like you need 'start over' (and your sponsor too I guess, if you have one)

the important thing to me is you stay committed...don't let this episode sap your self conifidence...keep focused- use what happened as a wake up call, a reason to be more cautious in future, maybe?

hang in there!
D

Cath1029

Thank you, Dee. It's just that I've had financial troubles before, but nothing ever like this. I'm just feeling angry that it's coming on the heels of having made good progress in recovery. Not to throw myself a pity party, but I'm all alone here. I haven't heard my daughter's little voice in 3 weeks. My sons won't be able to spend the night because I won't be able to feed them. Just becoming increasingly depressed. I appreciate your support though.

Dee74

I hear you Cath - I haven't kids, but for the first time since I got sober two and a half years ago, I'm wondering if I'll have enough left to pay the rent next week.

It's not a great feeling. It's made my addict voice stir in the half sleepy early morning hours - why bother trying to do this when you just end up in the same old place?

It's pretty easy to shake it off tho - it's lies.....I am in a way better place now, and in a way better position to be able to get back on top of things sooner.

stay the course Cath
D

UniversesChild

Hey everyone and congratulations to all!

...day 12 for me! It's getting easier to quit obsessing about having a beer. I have been to 11 meetings in 11 days so far. The Boyfriend/Roomate/WhateverHeIsToday quit smoking yesterday, so now I'm smoking outside but not drinking, and he's drinking (a little) but not smoking. What timing. Have court on Friday but at least I'm not as anxious as I used to be.

Cath1029

Thank you for the kind words, but it's official. Took a third one so I can just go to sleep for the rest of tonight. Don't worry, won't take any more. Maybe I can be in the group for October. Best of luck to all of you who are staying sober and hanging in there. I am rooting for you all.

Dee74

welcome to ya lady b

Hey Bubba what the heck is succotash anyway? LOL
D

racerAK

Hi all! This is day one of sobriety for me - a little about myself by way of introduction: I'm 28, a business owner, total gearhead and F1/racing fanatic. I got arrested for a DUI (my first and last, God willing) in June. At first I was angry - I had felt 'fine', had drank 4 beers over 4 hours, so "safe" drinking, but for a woman my size that was too many.

So why am I here? I attended my DUI class yesterday and it was, contrary to my assumption walking in, extremely helpful and informative. I realized yesterday (day 2) when we were going over the signs and stages of alcohol abuse that I demonstrate more than a few of the major warning signs & it freaked me out. Considering my extensive family history of severe alcoholism I feel that it is best to quit drinking entirely.

I do not feel the compulsion to drink EXCEPT when I am in social situations. When I am there though, I often find that I cannot have just one drink. I go in planning on having one but then more often than not end up drunk beyond belief. The blackouts have been more frequent and frankly that scares the ever-living daylights out of me.

I do not drink when I am at home - maybe one, every once in awhile, but I have never gotten drunk at home, never drink alone, and NEVER drink when I am depressed. These are pluses but nevertheless I feel that if I keep drinking at all it will undermine my ability and desire to stay sober in social situations.

In light of the situational nature of my drinking problems, I have publicly announced to my friends that I have quit drinking and am committed to this for at least a year. Most of them have been supportive (in fact they've suggested it before but I ignored it cause I felt bad) but some have not. I have my DUI class evaluation on the 1st, and I am going to ask that they refer me to treatment.

I also think it might be worth my while to attend a few beginner's AA meetings to get the support I'll need from others committed to sobriety.

Reading your posts today have been so helpful and I'm so proud of you all for your commitment!

endzoner

welcome to the class of sept there Racer , you sound like youve gotta great plan of attack there , and AA is a great place for support youll be glad you went . I'd like to also say thats one big leap so many are scared to take " telling your friends" most fear the humiliation and such , but you yourself found out who your true friends were when you announced this to them . coo'doos on doing so . were glad your here .. Im Endzy an im a alki 6 yrs in recovery and its a great place to be .... anything IS possible if you willing to do what ever it takes .. have a great sober day ~ endzy~

racerAK

Thank you so much End - congrats very much on your 6 years, that is wonderful - keep up the great work!

Ever since I announced it, I have been happily surprised to hear from people that I haven't heard from in awhile who have been through this (I never knew!) and they have been such a blessing. I know now that I have the support around me to make it. And make it count!

Dee74

hi Racer AK

Welcome to SR - you've found a good bunch of folks here

D

recycle

Day 1 looks like it is the books. What a good group of folks. Dee & Cath hang in there, you know that booze will not help your finances. Right?

Kablume

Welcome Ladyb, Rob, and Racer. Hope you'll like the Sept. group. Congrats to those with sobertime. Can't remember it all. It is a good day to be sober.
Went to a meeting last night and the topic was on the 1st step. Just what I needed to hear. Coincidence, I think not. I was where I was supposed to be.
Hope everyone has a great sober day today.

Dee74

Absolutely mate

if I've learnt anything by now, it's that when you're clean and sober a good day is always just around the corner...

thanks recycle

D

Cath1029

Me too. I messed up my body and my mind by taking those pills yesterday. I don't want to go through that again. I want to be sober in every way. So I will start over this morning and do my best.

Daisywings

Hi everyone. Still here. Still not drinking. Hang on y'all. :-)

JeffreySandman

Day 13 - The weekend was a little dicey. The alcoholic brain was looking for some reasons to drink but I did OK. Fishing without Coors was a new concept - danced with the devil by cooking with wine and drinking an O'Douls. Got through it OK though, have a feeling the real challenges will come in the weeks ahead. Hang in there everyone.

thirtybubba

Morning y'all.

Not doing so well today, messed up again last night--the withdrawals are really bad. But on a very positive note, I might have found a way out of this whole mess yesterday. A big part of my problem is boredom and loneliness. I hung out in the housing office because I was debating turning myself in--to what I don't know, detox, rehab, heck if this state wasn't just releasing criminals these days I'd have turned myself to prison. Anywhere but here, I was just tired of it all.

But I just hung out and talked about normal things, and ended up feeling so much better it's not funny. Of all the things, this disconnected feeling is the hardest to deal with by far. Went home and my roommates had been through my room. Don't know what they were looking for, don't know if they found it (everything I could think of was accounted for).

Anyways, got a few hours sober, my fingers can't move too well, at least the directions I'd like them to move in, and I'm feeling much better about my chances now.

-TB, drinking ner non-alcoholic water and back to eating candies.

ANGELINA243

TB--loneliness and boredom were a big part of my drinking....why I would go out to places where others were...which usually meant hanging out at a bar etc.

Withdrawals can be kinda scary, but I too went through them quite frequently. After a while--it seemed like it all became a part of the drinking game, yet I continued to drink....I just hoped that they wouldn't be very bad. I had to go to the hospital on a few occasions...I do remember with severe alcohol withdrawal.

Do whatever you need to get back on track---whether rehab, detox, treatment etc......you only get ONE life. I am just now beginning to realize the importance of mine.
Stay strong. Never give up.